“Did you kill him?” I asked curiously, feeling surprisingly sorry for the man.
“Of course not,” he replied, and all sense of sympathy left me.
“What did you do?”
“I dressed ye and brought ye home,” he answered, his cheeks growing red at the word ‘dressed’.
“Where is your brother?” I glanced at the window. Patrick had told me no one could fit through it, but at that moment I wasn’t sure if I believed him.
“I believe he’s still at our mum’s. She’s at her sister’s for de weekend.”
“That was your mother’s house?”
“Yes.”
“And you just left him there, to what? Watch some television? Make a little dinner? Have a beer?”
“I had to get ye home. Yer hand—”
My hand’s throbbing seemed to intensify as he pointed it out.
“Did you tell Peg where you found me?” I asked in suspicion. “Peg!” I yelled. “Peg!”
“Do not say a word!” he hissed quietly as we heard he steps moving toward us.
“Yer awake!” Peg cried as she came to the bed, pulling me up slowly and wrapping her arms around me as she burst into tears. “My poor baby.”
I met Kevie’s eyes over Peg’s shoulder, and barely held back the shudder at the glare on his face.
“What happened?” I asked Peg, never looking away from Kevie’s face.
“Ye don’t remember?” she asked in surprise, then hugged me even tighter. “Thank God. Thank God.”
“The priest here says he found ya in the alley behind the bar,” Doc said, coming into the doorway. “Says he thought you’d want him to bring you back here instead of the hospital.” His voice was laced with suspicion, and I couldn’t help the relief that ran through me. He didn’t believe it. He knew something was off.
“I’m just glad I was takin’ de short cut to Mum’s from de church,” Kevie said, his jaw clenching.
“I’m so glad yer home,” Peg whispered into my ear, “What would I have done? My poor girl.”
“I’m a little hungry,” I lied, leaning away from Peg’s arms. “And I’d really like a shower.”
“Of course!” she shot up from the bed, jostling my arm. “I’ll start some breakfast.”
She left the room and I turned to Doc, who hadn’t left his post. “Can I have a minute with Kevie?”
He stared at me for a long moment, and I honestly thought he was going to refuse, but then with a small nod of his head, he stepped out of the doorway.
“Why did you lie?” I asked, knowing from the shadow outside the door that Doc hadn’t gone far.
“If ye try to—” Kevie shook his head and stuffed his rosary beads into his pocket. “Do not go against me brudder,” he warned, “Ye’ll not come out of it unharmed.”
“I have nothing to lose.”
“Ye cannot honestly believe dat,” he argued.
“I could send him to prison.”
“Yer delusional,” he hissed leaning forward until I was forced to move back or our faces would be touching. “De police in Ballyshannon wouldn’t even arrest him, ye bloody idiot. No one would believe yer word over Malcolm’s. No one.”
“But they’d believe you. You’re a priest. They’d believe you.” I pointed out quietly, watching as his face moved from a pleading expression to completely void of emotion.
“I’ll not help ye put me brudder in prison,” he said resolutely, standing from his chair. “Keep yer accusations to yerself if ye know what’s good for ye.”
He left the room as I began to panic.
I had no recourse. There was absolutely nothing I could do. I couldn’t go to the police, Patrick wasn’t there, Charlie and Vera were gone… and I’d have to live knowing that at any time, Malcolm could come back to me.
Suddenly, I was overcome with a wave of disgust and I frantically pushed the blankets away from my body with my good hand. As I stood from the bed, the sore flesh between my thighs burned in protest, and I felt tears burn the backs of my eyes. I smelled like urine and sex.
“Need help?” Doc asked, looking at me kindly.
“I want to take a shower.” I lifted my right hand up to run it through my hair, and that’s when I finally remembered that it was gone. Tears dripped down my face as I looked at Doc. “I forgot,” I explained, running my fingers lightly over the patchy hair on my head. “It looks bad, doesn’t it?”
“You won’t be winning any beauty pageants,” he confirmed, “but it’ll grow back. Hair ain’t nothin’ worth worrying about.”
I opened my mouth to argue, but what was the point? It was gone.
“I’ll shave the rest off, if you want. It’s gotta be better than having patches all over like that.”
I think I nodded, and I didn’t resist as he ushered me toward the bathroom.
I’ll never know what he said to Peg that day when he went to get me painkillers from the kitchen, but I do know that she never bothered us as he shaved my head with a cheap razor from beneath the bathroom sink. He was careful. His hands touched me as little as possible, and when they did, it was as if I’d break at any minute.
I’m not sure why I didn’t balk at Doc helping me shower. Maybe it was because he treated me like a child. Maybe it was the air of calm that he exuded. More than likely, I was still in shock. For whatever reason, I didn’t panic once as he turned on the shower and sat on the toilet seat to help me get undressed.