I smile.
And somehow, the world starts spinning again.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
-LUCY-
I switch my e-reader off—unable to concentrate on the words—and take a sip of my soda. I don't enjoy chasing a buzz when Cam's not around. "Better get used to that," I mumble to myself.
"What?" Lucas says, sitting on the chair opposite me. We've spent almost every day outside, in or around the pool.
"Nothing," I answer.
He nods, but keeps looking at me strangely.
I watch the mayhem going on in the pool filled with seventeen-year-old boys.
"It's pretty cool here," he says. "Was this what your last high school summer was like?"
Slowly nodding my head, I reply, "I guess."
His brows bunch. "When did Dad build the cabin?"
"End of junior."
"Ohhhh." He nods slowly, then his features change to a look of disgust. "I think I can guess what you got up to then."
I laugh. "It wasn't just that. Our friends came around a lot. Replace the pool with the lake, the bar with a bonfire, and the mansion with my cabin, it comes pretty close to this."
He opens his mouth to speak, then shuts it, then opens it, then shuts it again.
"Say it," I tell him.
He smiles, but it's sad. "Have you spoken to Cam since you left?"
My gaze drops, and my features straighten. "No."
"Lucy..." he sighs.
"What?"
"When I said that we should come here, I kind of meant for a few days. I thought that maybe you needed to get away, clear your head. I didn't think we'd be here for two weeks. I didn't think that it was that big a deal, you know?"
"Lucas, I've been with Cam for five years, how is it not a big—"
"That's not what I meant," he interrupts. "Just give me a second..."
I wait.
And wait.
"I've known Cameron a long time," he starts, "as long you've known him. He's like a brother to me, Lucy. He's a brother to all of us. You know when people ask Lachlan how many brothers and sisters he has; he tells them he has one sister and six brothers. He always, always, says Cam's name first."
I drop the sunglasses that were on my head to cover my eyes; shielding him from the tears I know are coming.
"After Mom died, he was there. Nobody knew why, but nobody asked. When shit got bad with Dad, he stuck up for you. He did what I wanted to do but never could. When you had an eating disorder—"
"You knew?" I tremble.
He nods. "We all knew, Luce. We just didn't know what to do to help you. But Cam—he knew. Somehow, he made it stop. He saved you, and that meant that he saved all of us, because you were our rock. You became a parent to us when we had no one. And you needed saving. You needed someone to help you carry that weight."
I try to breathe through the pain, through the hurt, through the cries that are bursting to escape.
"I just think you should maybe talk to him, Lucy. I think that that fifteen-year-old kid who gave up his world and made you it deserves that. Don't you?"
I nod, because the giant lump in my throat won't allow me to speak.
"Good," he says, a slight smile on his face. "Because he's here."
"What!"
He jerks his head to the side gate where Cameron stands, looking down at the ground with his hands in his pockets.
"You told him where we were?"
He shakes his head. "No. I was out front when a cab dropped him off."
I look over at Cameron again. My heart beats so fast, so loud, that I feel it everywhere. "Not now!" I plead with Lucas.
"Now Luce," he says, getting up from his seat. "It's time."
I suck in a shaky breath as I watch him get up and spin on his heels. "Hey..." He turns back around. "I love you, Lucy goosey smells like poopsy."
I let out a laugh. And a cry. "I love you too, Lucas mucus smells like pukas."
He shakes his head and walks away... toward Cameron. Toward the one guy I've spent two weeks trying to forget.
Cam's head lifts when he sees Lucas approaching. They shake hands, and then he looks at me.
And my world stops.
Breathe.
In.
Out.
-CAMERON-
"Hey." I haven't been this nervous since the few seconds before I finally worked up the courage to kiss her.
I sit on the chair that I saw Lucas on, but I'm distracted. Who the hell are all these guys and why are they here?
"Hey," she says quietly. My eyes drift shut when I feel her hand on the side of my face. "Stop it," she whispers.
I work up the nerve to open them so I can see her. And when I do, my world stops. She's lifted the sunglasses off her head and her clear blue eyes pierce into mine.
"Stop what?" I croak.
She smiles softly. "This." She rubs her hand on my jaw. "Your jaw's all tense... and this..." Her thumb brushes the space between my eyebrows. "They're Lucas and Jason's friends. Don't worry." And for some stupid reason it means something. Like she knows what I'm thinking and she cares enough to ease my fears.
"Hey," I say again, because I don't know what else to say. And then I take her in, and my jaw tenses and my brows furrow again. She's in a plain white bikini, and nothing else. "Can we talk, somewhere more private?"