"She just...has a thing...with this weather." He spoke cautiously. "Could you just stay put until the weather clears?"
"Sure." I hung up, put her phone in the console and stroked the hair gently. "Amanda?"
She made a sound but didn't look up.
I don't know what the hell was going on, but it was more that just being afraid of rain.
A crack of thunder sounded. She flinched and started rocking back and forth.
I leaned over and tried to get her to calm down. I tried to hold her but she wouldn't stop rocking. "Baby, " I said.
That single word made her look up at me. She was crying. "I'm such a fucking baby." She sniffed.
"No, you're not." I soothed. "Come here."
I helped her so she was lying on top of me. I loved feeling her this close. It wasn't a sex thing, not all the time, sometimes I just want her. I moved the hair that'd fallen in front of her face to behind her ear. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?"
She shook her head. "I want to, Logan. Just not now."
I nodded and kissed her cheek before lowering my seat to a laying position. I got us comfortable while we waited out the storm. Honestly though, I could lay like this, with her in my arms forever, and it still wouldn't be long enough.
"I hate this," I told her.
"What?" She sniffed again.
"I hate seeing you like this; crying. I hate that you have to feel like this and I hate that I can't do shit about it."
Her head lifted from my neck. "You are doing something. You're here. That's something."
My hand started running through her hair. "It's not enough."
"It's more than I expected," she said, lowering her head to my chest.
Amanda
He put his free hand on the small of my back, and that's how we stayed, with his arms wrapped around me, his fingers in my hair, my head on his chest, and my heart in his hands.
Minutes went by before I felt his hand that was stroking my hair begin to slow, and his breathing evened out.
He'd fallen asleep.
I lifted my head slowly, hoping not to wake him.
And I looked at him.
And I forget where I am, and how I got here. I forget the storm outside, and all the memories associated with it. Because all I feel is him. I watched as his chest slowly rises and falls, his hair—that perfect mess, his lips slightly parted as his breath blew in and out.
My gaze lingered on his lips longer than it should, but I don't kiss him. Instead, I lay my head back down and let his rhythmic breathing lull me into my own slumber.
***
I get jolted awake by the ringing of my phone. It surprised me so much that I jumped and hit my head on the roof of Logan's car.
He was already chuckling as his hand soothed where my head just hit. "It's Ethan," he said, handing me my phone.
***
By the time we get home, the rain had stopped and the sun was out. We didn't talk about what happened in the stadium, and we didn't discuss my crying in the car.
A bunch of Ethan's friends were in the living room watching the game, including James. James walked past us to go to the kitchen. "Amanda," he nodded in greeting. Then looked to Logan, his eyebrows bunched in confusion. I don't know if he knew Logan lived here, or if he suspected something else. "Matthews," he did the same head nod towards Logan.
"Asshole," Logan replied.
We waited for James to be done in the kitchen before going in; I sat up on the counter while he got out two bottles of water. He handed me one the same time Ethan walked in.
"You okay?" he asked, clearly concerned.
I smiled at him. "Uh huh."
Logan leaned back on the opposite counter, crossing his arms over his chest.
"You sure?" Ethan asked again. He's always been a good brother, and even though we're twins, he's always acted like an older one, a protector of sorts. He understands who I am and he puts up with my shit, even when I don't deserve it. But the summer after senior year, things changed. He became more than just my brother, he became my best friend.
"'I'm sure E, it's fine. Logan took care of me."
Logan choked on his water, then tried to contain his laugh. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve, while Ethan looked from me to him, a look of disgust clear on his face.
"I don't even want to know," E said, shaking his head. He continued, "So, you don't..." a slow smirk developed as he took a step closer. I was confused for a second before his arms come up. "You don't need a hug do you?"
My legs automatically kicked out in front of me. "No. Ew. Gross."
He started laughing, backing away.
"What's that about?" Logan said through his own laughter.
Great. My brother and my whatever-the-hell Logan was, both laughing at me.
"Dimmy hates being hugged. Ask Tyson. It was the one thing he didn't love about her."
My face fell at the mention of his name. I could see Logan watching me from the corner of my eye. I knew what his next question was going to be. I mentally prepared myself for it.
Ethan left the room.
And then it was deadly silent.
I kept my eyes trained to the floor. I saw him take the few steps until he was right in front of me. He separated my legs so he could stand between them. Then he placed both hands on the counter either side of me.
I never looked up.
I waited.
And I waited.