With one jump the cat was on the bed and curled up on the pillow where Melanie should have put her head. Tucker threw himself backward on the bed and shut his eyes.
When he opened them again, bright sunshine was pouring into the room. Both of his hands went to his face to block out the pain. He flipped over on his stomach and covered his throbbing head with a pillow. It was going to be a long, long day for sure, and he needed coffee—lots of it.
He tossed the pillow away and slung his legs over the side of the bed. With something between a groan and a grunt, he stood up and reached for his jeans, only to realize that he’d slept in his clothes. He padded toward the kitchen for his first cup of coffee with Sassy right behind him.
“Good mornin’,” Jolene said cheerfully.
“What’s so good about it?” he grumbled.
She pulled out a chair. “Sit down.”
“Not before I get a cup of coffee.”
She pointed at the chair. “Coffee is not first. Sit!”
“I’m not a dog,” he argued, but he eased down into the chair.
“One time only,” she said, “you get my famous hangover cure. But only once—so write it down or suffer from now on. The ladies are coming for lunch, and we’re going to have a talk with Lucy about the way she’s acting. You don’t need a headache.”
She picked up a bottle of honey and squeezed it out into a tablespoon until it was almost overflowing. “Open your mouth and take this like medicine.”
“I’ll gag,” he protested.
She moved the spoon toward his lips. He could either open his mouth or honey would drip all the way down his shirt. Not sure if he had another clean one until he did laundry, he opened his mouth. The honey was so sweet that it did almost gag him, but he got it down.
“That’s supposed to work better than coffee?” He didn’t need her bossing him around, and he had his own hangover cure—black coffee and lots of it, and then a couple of aspirin.
“That’s just step one.” She handed him two aspirin and a cup of coffee. “Drink that while I get step three ready.”
“This I can believe in.” He picked up the coffee and downed the aspirin with the first sip.
She folded her arms across her chest and eyed him from toes to nose. “Three will do,” she said.
“Three what?”
“Scrambled eggs. You got to figure them by size. Mama took one, but you’ll need three,” she answered as she cracked eggs into a bowl. “You’ve got to be sober because the ladies are having an intervention thing with Lucy today. They were worried about bringing out booze since you drink on weekends, but I told them it would be fine. So it’s going to be.” She raised both eyebrows.
“Yes, ma’am.” Sarcasm coated each word.
There was no way he could eat eggs. They wouldn’t stay down, and he didn’t need to be there while those women had—what was that word she’d used? He tried to think of it, but his head pounded. He almost snapped his fingers in victory when he thought of the word intervention.
“You think you’re magic, do you?” he asked.
“Nope, I’m not magic, but I lived with a drunk long enough to know how to take care of a demon hangover. I did this lots of times for my mother, but you’re not kin to me, Tucker, so I’m only doin’ it once. I don’t have a lot of sympathy for drunks with hangovers, but I want you to be your charming self for my friends this afternoon.”
By the time he’d finished his first cup of coffee, she’d put a plate of eggs and two pieces of toast in front of him. One bite and it was all going to come right back up—he had no doubt. But to prove himself wrong, he shoveled one bite after another into his mouth.
“More coffee?” he asked when he finished.
“Not yet,” she said.
“I need at least one potful, maybe two,” he groaned.
She laid a banana on the table. “Last step. You eat every bite of that and then go take a warm shower. When you come back, you can have another cup of coffee.”
He could feel his nose curling in disgust at the thought of taking even one bite, much less eating the whole thing. “You’ve got to be kidding me—a banana?”
“When the dance ends, it’s time to pay the fiddler. You had your night, and now you need potassium. Eat the banana and then go to the shower. I usually just lined all this stuff up for my mother on the cabinet Friday night. If she wasn’t up by the time I had to go pull a double shift on Saturday, she knew how to do it.”
“So if it works for me, will I find everything on the counter next time?” Dammit! She was beyond cute that morning with her take-charge attitude. Melanie might be right about her being a strong woman who didn’t need his protection.
“No, like I said, this is a onetime deal,” she told him and changed the subject. “Did you sleep in those clothes?”
“Yep.” He peeled the banana and took a small bite. It wasn’t nearly as bad as he’d thought it would be. “And once I get out of them, I’ve got laundry to do. Want to do it together or separate?”
“Might as well save on the water bill and do it together. Mine’s already in the utility room. Bring yours, and we’ll get it sorted after your shower,” she said.