Tears burned my eyes, but I forced myself to blink them away. I’d be strong. It wasn’t like I had many other choices. “According to Stephen, losing a soul’s a great thing, but I know this hunger is bad. According to you, I could kill people if I lose control. And I could change into something else, right?”
He nodded. “If you can’t control your hunger, you’ll become mindless, like a zombie whose only desire is to feed.”
“Awesome. A kissing zombie.” He wasn’t easing my mind, and yet I hadn’t pulled away from him. “So what am I supposed to do?”
There was a short hesitation before he spoke again. “Help me. And I’ll help you.”
My breath caught. “You can help me?”
“I can.”
“But…how? My soul, it—it’s gone. Stephen said it’s gone forever. I can’t get it back.”
Bishop sent another glance through the club before locking gazes with me again. “He was wrong. I’ll help you restore your soul. I believe there’s a way.”
I felt a sharp, hopeful lurch in my chest. “How?”
“Here’s the thing. I’ll help you, Samantha, but you have to help me in return. That’s the deal.”
I looked at him bleakly. “I thought only demons and car salesmen made deals. Not angels.”
“I need you to find the others for me. I’ll make a deal with you to make that possible. It’s that simple.”
His controlled expression gave nothing away, but his blue eyes—they told another story. They were filled with worry, with hope, and all of it was directed at me. I held the fate of his mission in my hands—according to him, anyway. And he held my entire future in his.
If I made this choice to help him, my destiny would be irrevocably connected to an angel who frightened, angered and frustrated me, but also intrigued me more than I wanted to admit.
Even though I was essentially one of the monsters, he was willing to bargain with me. If there’d been an outbreak of vampires in the city, I wouldn’t blink at the thought of vampire hunters running around with wooden stakes taking care of the problem.
Then again, if I was one of the vampires…
“Would you have killed me last night in the alley if I hadn’t gotten away?” I finally asked. “Despite our ‘connection,’ despite me being ‘special’? Would you have?”
His brows drew together and it took him a moment to answer. “I hadn’t realized what you were until Kraven pointed it out, so it took me by surprise. I should be able to sense that, too. But you aren’t feeding, you aren’t putting anyone at risk. You’re coherent and thinking rationally. No, I wouldn’t have killed you.”
“Liar.”
His eyes flicked sharply to mine as if I’d insulted him. After all, he had just told me that angels didn’t lie. “I can’t change what’s happened so far or what you think I would or wouldn’t have done. The question is, what do you want to do next?”
Again, Bishop was so close to me that our bodies were almost touching. It was as if he was a magnet for me and I couldn’t resist his pull. “If I help you find your friends—and you help to restore my soul—you also have to promise to keep me safe, just like you told Stephen you would.”
I was revising the contract as we went along. My father was a lawyer, so I supposed it came naturally.
He raised an eyebrow. “Deal. I also have another condition of my own.”
Great. Although, I supposed it was only fair. “What is it?”
“When I need you to, you’ll help take the cloud away from my mind.”
“You need me to…?” I began, but then I got it. “You want me to touch you sometimes, because it takes your confusion away.”
“You seem to have that ability,” he said, his expression tight as if it pained him to admit it.
I’d twisted my hair so tight that the tip of my finger had turned a lovely shade of purple. “Deal. But I’m not touching you all the time.” Which was too bad, really.…
“No, definitely not all the time.” But something slid behind his gaze then. Something that went against his words.
I’d started breathing quicker and hadn’t taken a single step away from him, despite how adamant I’d tried to sound about keeping my distance. God, what was wrong with me? He affected me like no boy I’d ever known.
Maybe because he wasn’t a boy at all.
I shivered.
Fine. I’d help him. I had no other choice from where I stood, other than going back upstairs and getting cozy with Stephen and his new “brothers and sisters.”
Carly must have gotten tired of waiting, because suddenly there she was, stretching her hand out to Bishop.
“I’m Carly, by the way,” she said. “Nice to meet you.”
Bishop hesitated a moment before he shook Carly’s hand. “Bishop.”
“So are we leaving or what, Sam? What’s going on?”
That was the question of the day. What was going on?
I might not feel like a monster who hungered for human souls, but kissing Stephen had changed me and could eventually take me down a very dark road if I didn’t do anything to fix it. Bishop had said he could restore my soul, which would take away the hunger I now constantly felt.
Stephen had offered no such solution.
“You need to go home now, Carly,” I said.