“I just need two aspirin and some water and I’ll be fine.”
That’s no good at all. “When did you last eat some food, Brynne?”
“So, we’re back to first names again?”
Yes, we are, baby. I didn’t like her not taking care of herself. She needed to eat like everyone else. After a moment she said something about making food when she got home. At this late hour? For f**k’s sake, that will simply not do, Brynne.
I pulled into a corner shop and told her to stay in the car, I’d be right back. I got her a bottled water, a packet of Nurofen and a protein bar that looked palatable. I just hoped she would accept them from me.
“What did you need to get in the store—”
Not a worry. She took the water as soon as she spotted it and started drinking. I removed the pills from the packet for her and held them open in my hand. She took those too, and gulped them down, draining the bottle quickly. I set the protein bar on her knee.
“Now eat it—please.”
She sighed, a long, shuddering breath that made my c**k twitch again, and opened the bar slowly. But something changed in her demeanor as she took a bite and started chewing. I sensed melancholy from her when she bowed her head and whispered, “Thank you.”
“My pleasure. Everyone needs the basics, Brynne. Food, water…a bed.”
She didn’t respond to my subtle reprimand.
“What’s your actual street address?” I asked.
“41 Franklin Crossing.”
I headed back on the road and in a moment, heard her mobile chirp. She responded to a text and seemed to relax a bit after that. A few moments later, she closed her eyes and fell asleep.
Having her comfortable and feeling safe with me flipped some kind of switch inside my head. I couldn’t say what exactly, because it was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. I just knew I f**king liked the feeling. I did something reckless then. I wasn’t proud of what I did, but that didn’t stop me from doing it. I carefully took her mobile from her lap and called my number with it.
“Brynne, wake up.” I leaned in and touched her shoulder, speaking close enough to smell her natural scent. Her eyelids twitched erratically, the long lashes sweeping down onto creamy skin with just a hint of olive to it. Was she dreaming? Her lips were full and dark pink, barely parted as she breathed. A few loose strands of her long brown hair fell over one cheek. I wanted to lift it to my nose and smell it.
Her eyes fluttered open, flaring wide as she became aware of me.
“Shit! I’m sorry I—I fell asleep?” She grappled with the door latch frantically, the sound of panic in her voice.
I covered her hand with mine and stilled her. “Easy. You’re safe, everything’s fine. You just drifted off is all.”
“Okay…sorry.” She panted deeply, looked out the window, and then back to me warily.
“Why do you keep apologizing?” She seemed very rattled, and I wanted nothing more than to soothe her fears, but at the same time—I was annoyed with the strange sensation of which I had absolutely no purposeful reason to be feeling.
“I don’t know,” she whispered at me.
“Are you okay?” I smiled, hoping I wasn’t freaking her out. I didn’t like the idea of her being afraid of me, but I did want her to remember me after tonight. I wanted her to trust me, too.
“Thank you for the ride. And the water. And the other stu—”
I interrupted her, knowing I had to take charge so there would be another opportunity for me to meet her again. “You take care of yourself, Brynne Bennett.” I unlocked the door. “You have your key ready? I’ll wait until you’re inside. What floor is it?”
She retrieved her key from her bag and put her mobile into it. “I live in the top studio loft, fifth floor.”
“Roommate?”
“Well, yes, but she’s probably not in.”
What was she thinking? I so wanted to know what she thought of me, if she was interested in finding out anything more about me. “I’ll look for the light to come on then,” I said.
She opened her door and stepped out. “Goodnight, Ethan Blackstone,” she said to me before she shut the door.
I followed her with my eyes as she made her way to her door, used her key and went inside. I waited until I saw the light come on in her fifth-floor loft before I pulled out.
I didn’t know exactly what I felt, or what might happen when I drove away from her place. But I did know this: I would be seeing Brynne Bennett again. Most definitely. There was no other option I would accept on the matter…
I smiled to myself because I didn’t feel the cold anymore. My leg hurt, but I knew it really didn’t matter now. I felt warm, and I was in my safe place with my memories of Brynne, where everything was good and right. She was my light and had been from the first moment I looked upon her beauty. She’d loved me, and held me together, when I didn’t think it was possible for anyone to work that miracle. We were going to have a baby soon. Thinking of our baby made me happy, but very sad at the same time. I couldn’t see my child in the place where I was going. He or she wouldn’t ever know me. But Brynne would tell our son or daughter about me. She would be such a wonderful mother. She already was. Brynne was good at everything she did and motherhood was no different. I knew there wasn’t much time left for me. I couldn’t keep my promise to her. That ripped into my heart worse than anything could. I’d promised I would come back to her. I’d said that nothing could ever keep me from coming back to her.
I desperately wanted to tell her how much I loved her, and how happy she’d made me in our time together. How I could go away, knowing I’d been loved by the most perfect woman in the world? That she was the only person to ever really see inside my dark soul to find me—and still made me feel like I’d won the f**king national lottery of life. It didn’t hurt me so much knowing my life would be cut short. The joyfulness was in knowing she’d been a part of it.
Brynne was my life. The last piece of my puzzle that had finally completed me.
I just needed a way to tell her somehow, so she wouldn’t worry about me. I wanted her to know how happy I was at the end of my life…because I’d been blessed with the rare and precious gift…of loving her.
CHAPTER 17
10th January
London