“No.” She gestures to the bucket with her foot inside it. “I’m kind of indisposed and am sick of playing games. Call Bree.”
“Don’t give me crap. I didn’t plan last night to play out the way it did.”
Julian taps me on the leg. “Derek, you said ‘crap.’”
“So?”
He leans in close and whispers, “It’s a bad word.”
Brandi nods. “It’s written on our no-no word list. You can’t say it.”
Only Brandi could have a no-no word list.
“‘Crap’ is not a bad word.” I look to Ashtyn for confirmation, but she shrugs like she has no opinion whatsoever. The girl can think of an argument for any little thing, but when it comes to backing me up, she’s at a loss for words. “I can think of a ton of other words that are way worse than ‘crap.’”
“Stop saying it.” Ashtyn joins the no-no list brigade. “You’re corrupting my nephew.”
“You’re just pissed at me ’cause of last night.”
“You’re so wrong,” Ashtyn says. “You couldn’t be more wrong.”
“Wait, did I miss something? What happened last night?” Brandi asks.
Ashtyn gives me a level stare. “Nothing happened. Right, Derek?”
“Right.”
“Where did you two go?”
“Trampolining, then White Fence Farm,” Ashtyn says.
Brandi puts down her polish and furrows her brows. “Then why are you pissed at him? It sounds like fun.”
“I don’t want to talk about it, Brandi. Okay? You just keep thinking that Derek’s perfect just like everyone else.”
“Nobody’s perfect,” I tell her. “Not even you, Ashtyn.”
“I never once said I was perfect. In fact, I’m an idiot.”
“Join the club.”
When Gus arrives home a few minutes later, he takes one look at Ashtyn with her foot in the ice bucket and mumbles something about canceling football camp and getting his money back.
“What football camp?” Brandi asks.
“Your sister wants to drive to some football camp in Texas. By herself,” Gus announces. “It’s not happening.”
“Wait, I have an idea!” Brandi, my scatterbrained stepmother, whirls around and looks at me as if I will save the day. She claps her hands, careful not to ruin her freshly manicured nails and says excitedly, “Derek is going to Texas to visit his grandmother. Derek can drop Ashtyn at football camp, then go see his grandmother. Then he can pick Ashtyn back up and come home. It’s the perfect solution!”
Everyone’s eyes are on me. What, does Brandi think that putting us in a car together will miraculously fix whatever’s wrong in her sister’s life? Not gonna happen. “I don’t think so.”
Ashtyn nods. “I agree. That’s the worst idea.”
Gus nods. “Then it’s settled, Ashtyn. You’re not going.”
Chapter 30
Ashtyn
I spend the next two hours calling everyone I know outside of my core group of friends. Nobody can make the trip to Texas with me. I’m out of options . . . almost.
Derek.
I’d rather eat nothing but green smoothies for an entire week than be stuck with him on a road trip. I made a complete fool out of myself on our nondate, and feel like an idiot because every time I think of his hands on my body or the way his tongue slid against mine, my knees go weak and I get a tingling sensation in my stomach. I hate myself for falling into Derek’s trap.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath, then try to come up with a plan on how to get to Texas without Derek. Ugh, it’s impossible.
Derek is the only person who can help me. I find him outside, on top of the shed, shirtless. He’s hammering a nail, but all I can think about is getting carried away feeling those tight abs last night. I wish I could wipe that memory from my brain, but it’s obvious that’s not about to happen.
“I need to talk to you,” I say.
He continues to pound away. “Why? You ready to talk about why you’re so pissed?”
“Not really, but I don’t have a choice.” I sigh. “I shouldn’t have kissed you last night. Or let you kiss me. It was a huge mistake that I’ll regret forever. I’m pissed at you for tempting me and I’m mad at myself for letting it happen. You got me at a weak moment and it sucks knowing I can’t turn back time and erase it. There, I said it.”
“Forever’s a long time, you know,” he says.
“I’m well aware of that, thank you,” I say. “I didn’t want to ask you this, but I need your help with the whole driving-to-Texas thing so I can go to football camp. I’ve called everyone I know and even some people I don’t really know. Nobody can do it.”
“I’m your last choice, huh?”
“Yep.”
He jumps off the roof of the shed and walks up to me. “You made the rule that we weren’t supposed to get into each other’s business. Last night we did and look what happened. I’d say drivin’ you out of state and sleepin’ at campgrounds in a tent together definitely counts as gettin’ into each other’s business.”
Wait. I think I heard him right, but I’m not sure. “Campgrounds?”
“I like to rough it.”
Roughing it isn’t my thing, but I’m desperate, so I lie and put on a big, fake smile. “I love camping!”
He shakes his head. “I don’t think so.”
I shield my eyes as I look up at him. “You wanted me to challenge you and argue with you. I’m willing to keep playing this game if you are, minus the kissing and touching part. Think of all the time we’ll have to argue and annoy each other driving to Texas.”
“Sounds temptin’, but after last night, that’s probably the worst idea. Ever.” He points to the chewed-up football. “Oh, yeah. And thanks for feedin’ the football I gave you to your dog. I’ll bet it’s sacrilegious to destroy Troy Aikman’s signature, but don’t worry. I won’t out you.”
He heads for the house. I can’t let him walk away from me, not now. I catch up and stand in his way.
He gently nudges me aside. “Sorry, Ashtyn. I can’t help ya.”
Time to let it all out, no matter if my ego is bruised. “Wait! Derek, football means everything to me. I need to go to Texas. I need to prove to everyone else and myself that I deserve to be there as much as any guy. I didn’t tell you before, but Landon left our team to play for our rivals. I refuse to give up, even though everything seems useless now.” I look away because my eyes are starting to tear up. “You don’t understand. I don’t have anything else besides football.” I gesture to Falkor, whose head is resting on Derek’s feet. “I don’t even have my dog anymore because he likes you better. I don’t have much, and I don’t ask for much. You’re my last hope.”
I take a deep, shaky breath, knowing full well that my tears are on the brink of overflowing. Derek rubs the back of his neck, deep in thought.
“Sorry, can’t do it.”
“Name your price,” I offer in desperation.
“My price?”
“Yeah. Just throw out a number.”
“A million dollars,” he says.
Yeah, right. “Obviously I don’t have a million dollars.” I calculate how much money I’ve saved up from babysitting, holidays, and birthdays. My dad gave me cash for special occasions—his consolation prize for my crappy home life. “I’ll pay you a hundred bucks and I’ll split the cost of gas.”
“Just a hundred?” he asks, unimpressed. “That’s less than minimum wage.”
“This is a cash job, remember?”
“You’re not takin’ the stress factor into consideration. Dealin’ with you, Sugar Pie, ain’t a piece of cake.”
“I’ll throw in two boxes of granola bars for the car ride.” I hold out my hand. “Deal?”
He looks at my hand for a long time. Then he shakes his head. “Listen, Ashtyn. I don’t—”
“Come on, Derek. This isn’t a joke. I don’t have anyone I can count on anymore. My boyfriend ditched me, we don’t have a decent quarterback. My life is a complete mess. I’m, like, drowning here. Prove to me that it’s not all hopeless.”
He rubs his neck again, then sighs a few times as he looks across the yard. Finally he says, “All right. Deal.”
Chapter 31
Derek
I got suckered into coming to Illinois.
I got suckered into going to Texas.
I got suckered into going on a road trip with a girl who makes me want to kiss her and stay far away from her at the same time.
How the hell does this stuff happen to me? I couldn’t say no to Ashtyn when she talked about how much football and this trip meant to her. Once upon a time football meant that much to me.
Ashtyn has that spark I used to have. I see it in her eyes. I don’t know what she thinks she’ll accomplish by going to football camp, but I have no doubt she’s going to use everything in her arsenal to get noticed by scouts.
Four days later, we load up my SUV. Ashtyn made a big deal out of raiding the pantry for junk food to chow on during the drive. I stuck some granola bars Ashtyn bought in my backpack, but decide to bring stuff to make my own food.
“What is that?” Ashtyn asks as I walk out of the house.
“A blender.”
“You’re bringing a blender on a road trip?”
“Yep.” Give me some bananas and spinach and I’ll have a good breakfast. If Ashtyn thinks I’m going to eat candy or cookies for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, she better think again.
After saying our good-byes to Brandi, Julian, and Gus, we’re ready to get out of town.
Falkor jumps in the backseat when I open the door.
“You’re not invited.” He looks at me with droopy eyes and doesn’t move. Ashtyn tries to get him out, but he doesn’t move until I say, “Out!”
Suddenly Julian is at my side, hugging my legs with his little kid arms. “You’ll come back, right?”
I kneel down to him. “Of course I’ll come back.”
Ashtyn peeks out of the window. “Hey, Julian. You want to give me a hug, too?”
Julian nods.
Ashtyn gets out of the car and kneels down. She pulls him toward her and hugs him. That hug is full of warmth and emotion . . . she doesn’t want to let him go. It’s like she’s craving the unconditional love Julian’s giving her right now. It’s something I could never give her.
Ashtyn kicks her shoes off and makes herself comfortable after we pull onto the highway. Soon, we’re out of the city and see nothing but farms and a lone hawk flying overhead.
“You hungry?” She reaches into her backpack and pulls out some crackers and a can of cheese spread. “Want some?”
“Nah.”
“It’s not gonna kill you, Derek.” She holds a cracker, piled high with semiliquefied cheese, in front of my mouth. “Try it.”