Swallowing my annoyance, I snatch a jacket out of my closet and put it on. “Better?”
He studies me for a long beat before walking over to me.
I expect him to kiss me and apologize for being an ass, but he brushes his thumb over my lips, smearing my lipstick.
“I hate when you wear that stupid shit.”
Before I can protest, he grabs my wrist and charges out the door. “Come on. We’re late.”
“That’s fascinating,” Ruth exclaims as she takes another bite of her food. “So, how many brain scans have they conducted on you since the accident?”
Looking down at my plate, I shift uncomfortably in my seat. I suddenly feel like a specimen being studied under a microscope and I hate it.
“I’m not sure of the exact number, but I’ve definitely had a few,” I murmur, silently praying Stone takes the hint and comes to my rescue.
Ruth brings her glass of water to her lips. “Well, I’d love to take a look at them one day.”
For the love of God.
I force a polite smile. “Sure.”
Studying me intently, Ruth’s boyfriend Eugene pushes his glasses up his nose. “From my understanding patients with long-term retrograde amnesia don’t always recover.”
Well, isn’t he just a giant ray of sunshine?
I stab my Caesar salad with my fork. “Right.”
Across the table, Stone’s friend Robby clears his throat. “I wouldn’t say it’s impossible, though.” He drums his fingers along his chin. “Although they do say distant memories are the first to return and the most recent ones return last. It’s also been noted in some medical journals that if memories come back, they tend to return within two years.” He looks at me. “How long has it been since the accident?”
I’m about to answer, but Ruth beats me to it. “Two years.”
“Technically, it’s been a year and a half,” I correct.
The three of them exchange a thoughtful glance, as though they’re having a silent conversation about me.
Holy hell. I came here to meet my fiancé’s new friends, not be evaluated like some kind of lab mouse.
Aggravated, I squeeze Stone’s hand under the table.
He drapes his arm around my shoulder. “What do you say we give Bianca a break and talk about something else for a bit?”
Finally.
“Sure,” Robby agrees, but I can tell they’re all a tad disappointed about the change in topic.
“So,” Ruth begins. “When is the big day?”
I pause mid-bite. “Big day?” I question at the same time Stone says, “August eighteenth.”
Well, shit.
“Oh, duh.” I smack my forehead. “Sorry. Crappy memory and all.”
At that they all laugh.
Except Stone.
He pinches my thigh. Hard.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him to stop behaving like a child who’s not getting his way, but part of me feels bad because I know I’ve just embarrassed him in front of his friends.
“Wow,” Ruth declares. “The wedding is soon.”
Too soon.
“I know.” Smiling, Stone kisses my hand. “But we didn’t want to wait another second to start the rest of our lives together.”
Despite the ball of lead that fills my belly, I return his smile. “Yeah.”
“Well, I for one, love weddings. They’re so romantic and inspiring. What venue did you guys ch—”
I don’t hear the end of Ruth’s sentence because panic claws up my throat. Before I can stop myself, I fly out of my seat, desperate for an escape.
“I’m sorry,” I mutter. “I just remembered I have to make an important phone call.” Thinking quick, I add, “For the wedding.”
Stone starts to stand up, but I stop him. “It’s okay. Stay here with your friends. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
Heart beating double time, I quickly scurry to the first exit I see in the back of the restaurant.
The moment I’m outside, I draw in a cleansing breath, filling my lungs with the nighttime air.
It’s just cold feet—I assure myself. Happens to everyone.
“Are you okay?”
My head snaps up at the sound of his deep, familiar voice.
“What are you doing here?”
It’s been over a week since we last spoke and every time our paths cross on campus, he makes it a point to turn the opposite direction, intentionally avoiding me.
Leaning against the building, Oakley shrugs one of his broad shoulders and brings what looks like an e-cigarette to his lips. “Escaping.” He angles his head. “What about you?”
I tell him the truth. “Same.”
He studies me intently, only unlike Stone’s doctor friends inside, it doesn’t feel like an invasion. “From what?”
I open my mouth to tell him, but think better of it because it’s not okay for him to treat me like I have leprosy one moment and then start prying about my life the next.
“For someone who wants nothing to do with me you seem awfully curious about my problems,” I point out.
His tongue finds his cheek. “You’re right.” Disgusted, he examines his e-cigarette. “These things fucking suck.” Without warning, he chucks it across the parking lot. “Enjoy the rest of your night.”
“Wait,” I call out when he starts to leave. “If you tell me what you’re escaping from out here, then I’ll tell you what I’m escaping from.”
For a moment he looks like he wants to protest, but to my surprise, he doesn’t. “Fine.” Brushing a strand of dark blond hair away from his eyes, he murmurs, “I was at an AA meeting and a few of the guys wanted to grab a bite to eat after. Everything was chill until they started talking about all the funny shit they did when they were either drunk or high.” He shoves a hand in the pocket of his jeans. “It suddenly occurred to me that the only good memories I have when I wasn’t trashed out of my mind are…” His voice trails off with a shake of his head. “Doesn’t fucking matter.”
“Are what?” I press, taking a step closer.
Something passes in his gaze. “With you.”
His words punch into my heart.
I’d give just about anything to know what those memories are.
“I’m so—”
“Your turn,” he interjects.
“Well,” I begin, rubbing my damp palms on my dress. “I’m here having dinner with a few of Stone’s friends from the premed program.” I make a face. “Let’s just say they’re way more interested in my amnesia and wedding plans than they are getting to know me.” I look down at my shoes. “Long story short, I had a mini freak-out and came out here because I needed air.”
I have no idea what to make of the look he gives me.
The silence stretches between us until the only thing I hear are cars passing in the distance and the pounding of my heart.
“I feel like I don’t belong anywhere,” I confess after another minute. “Like I’m stuck on the outside looking in on a world I can no longer remember with people who want me to be a certain way…but no matter how hard I try, I’m constantly failing to live up to their expectations.”