I just don’t want those babies now. I’d prefer to at least graduate college first since the next four years are going to be the hardest of my life.
The years that will determine whether or not I go pro.
Feeling much better than I did five minutes ago, I head down to the kitchen for a bite to eat.
I’m supposed to be meeting with the head coach from Duke’s Heart later today and I want to make sure my stomach isn’t growling.
I’m rifling through the fridge when I hear a knock on the patio door.
Turning my head, I motion for Oakley to come inside.
For fuck’s sake, I don’t even know why he bothers knocking to begin with. He knows this place is his home.
“What up, man?”
I have no idea what to make of the look he gives me. “You got a second to talk?”
Shit. This can’t be good.
On the bright side, I know he’s not knocked up either.
“Sure. You talk while I make some food.” I pull out some eggs and peppers. “Is this a game of charades and you want me to guess what’s wrong?”
He shakes his head, the expression on his face growing grim.
My stomach knots. Like me, Oakley’s usually in a good mood.
But not right now.
Right now, he looks like he’s about to have a man-baby breakdown.
I crack a few eggs into a bowl, stir, add some peppers, stir some more, and pour the concoction into the frying pan.
All the while, he doesn’t say a single word.
“Dude. You’re making me nervous. What the fuck is up?”
He rocks back on his heels. “Sawyer…she—”
“Got into a huge fight with Dylan,” I interject. “Bro, I know. But let the girls handle it themselves. If Jace and I aren’t worried about it, you shouldn’t be either.”
“That’s not…” His voice trails off. “I just need you to know I never meant…”
I place the spatula on the counter. “Jesus Christ, Oakley. Spit it out.”
“Sawyer’s been taking Adderall.”
I pick up the spatula again. “The ADHD medication?”
She never mentioned having ADHD before. But the new diagnosis and the new medication would explain why she’s been acting so weird. She’s probably still adjusting.
Still hurts that she didn’t tell me, though.
“To be honest, I’m kind of pissed she told you about it instead of her boyfriend. I guess she was embarrassed because I always tease her about being a nerd when she actually needed help.”
And just like that, I’m back in the shitty boyfriend house.
His eyebrows pinch. “I don’t think you understand.”
“Understand what?”
He grips the back of his neck. “She doesn’t have ADHD and she wasn’t prescribed Adderall by a doctor.” He inhales sharply. “I gave them to her.”
He’s right. I don’t understand.
“Why? How? Why the fuck would you give her—”
“She said she wanted them to help her study…but, fuck, man. She has a problem. A big one.”
No, he’s about to have a problem.
It all hits me in one big rush. I don’t know much about this shit, but I do know college kids take it to help them study.
I also can’t help but wonder. “These pills…do they make people lose weight?”
“It’s an amphetamine, so yeah…they do.”
“Amphetamine…you mean—”
“Speed.”
Goddammit.
Placing the spatula down again, I look him in the eyes. “Let me get this straight…you gave my girlfriend speed?”
His guilt is palpable, but not nearly as palpable as the rage I have coursing through me.
“She said she needed it to help her stu—”
He doesn’t get to finish that sentence because I propel my fist into his face. “When?”
He staggers back. “When what?”
I punch him again. “When did you start giving them to her?”
“A few months ago. Around the time you two started dating.”
That’s when she started losing weight.
I grab the collar of his hoodie. “Where did you get the pills?”
“I’ve been dealing for Loki.”
Son-of-a-bitch. I launch my fist into his face again. “What the fuck is the matter with you?”
Giving her pills from a lowlife drug dealer? Fuck knows what could have been in them.
Jesus Christ. He could have killed her.
I’m so pissed. So fucking pissed I want to light his precious BMW on fire and then piss on it, so he feels just a small fraction of what I do right now.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “So fucking sorry.”
Sorry doesn’t cut it. Sawyer’s been disappearing before my very eyes for months thanks to him.
I punch him again. Hard. So hard I feel his skin split and his nose crack beneath my knuckles.
The guy who was my best friend is nothing but a traitor… a traitor who’s been dealing drugs to the girl I love behind my back for months.
He didn’t just break the code…the motherfucker shit all over it.
“You bastard.” I deck him again. “I went to my dad and gave you a place to stay when you had nothing, you piece of shit.”
I’ve held his head up when he drank too much and puked.
I’ve watched over him whenever he’s had seizures to make sure he was safe.
I’ve lied to Jace about him doing drugs because he didn’t want Jace to end their friendship.
I kicked people’s asses for fucking with him back when he was new in town.
Hell, I considered him my surrogate brother, the one who took Liam’s place…and this is how he repays me?
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, over and over.
Christ. If it was anyone else, I could probably forgive him.
But not my Sawyer. She’s my line you don’t cross.
She’s my everything.
Blood trickles down his face and onto the floor. I bring my hand back to sock him again, but a sharp shooting pain grips my chest.
I stumble back. “Fuck.”
“Are you okay?” Oakley questions.
It hurts so bad I can’t even tell him to go fuck himself.
Liam.
It can’t be, though. It’s impossible.
Another round hits, worse than before.
“You’re really starting to scare me, man.”
I’m about to tell him he should be scared because I’m not done kicking his ass yet—but my phone rings.
I dig out my cell. Why the hell is Dylan calling me?
I feel sick when it occurs to me. “Something’s wrong with Jace.”
“What—” Oakley starts to say, but I bring the phone to my ear.
“What happened to him?”
Dylan’s crying so hard she can’t form words…just sobs.
Gripping the phone in my hand, I scream, “Goddammit, Dylan! What the fuck happened to my brother?”
Jace is our glue…me and Bianca…we fucking need him.
“Jace is fine,” she croaks through another round of sobs. “Sawyer…she...had a heart attack. Her parents called an ambulance, but she coded on the way there—”