When he put his hands on my shoulders for a brief moment after I’d accomplished the apparently impossible task of dressing myself with assistance, it took all the willpower I possessed not to lean back into him.
Oblivious to my plight, he pushed the button to the elevator and I gave him a shaky smile, hoping he didn’t sense how nervous and excited he made me.
Now if I could just remember that nothing was going to happen between us, everything would be fine.
CHAPTER NINE
The charity event was, as so many of them were, in the ballroom of a hotel downtown. There was a DJ playing innocuous music in the background, trees with white Christmas lights surrounding the room, tables and chairs set up on the outskirts of the dance floor. A few couples danced, but most of the people were congregated around either the open bar or what looked to be a silent auction.
There was a podium up front on the stage near the DJ and I wondered whether we had missed the speeches or if we’d be forced to sit through them while the Women’s Texan League congratulated themselves on how amazing they were for what would feel like an actual eternity.
“Can I get you a drink?” Tyler offered.
I figured with how pretty he was I should probably keep my wits about me. “Just a club soda for me. Thank you.”
“I’ll be right back.”
I tried to tamp down my jealousy when I noticed all the female gazes that followed him to the bar. I found an empty table and sat. My phone buzzed inside my purse and I took it out.
There was a text from Brad.
So much for not contacting me. He hadn’t even made it an entire week.
Annoyed, I clicked on the text. It said:
It was hard to tell with Brad whether this was just a friendly but completely misguided text, him forgetting that I’d asked for no contact. Or if he was just ignoring the fact that I had ended things and was still holding out some hope that he could “win” me back.
He couldn’t. I wanted more.
Speaking of more, my eyes were drawn to where Tyler stood. He had run into somebody he knew at the bar and I watched as he shook hands with the other man. The man must have said something funny, because Tyler laughed, and I wished I were closer so that I could hear him.
Brad got what he wanted because I was thinking about him and our relationship, but none of it was good. I remembered when I’d been talking to him at my parents’ house and had told him that we should move on and find other people. At the time I had thought it was strange that Tyler had popped into my head. But I realized that it was because he was the first person I’d been this attracted to, ever. It was quickly becoming a more intense crush for me than the one I’d had on Brad when I was fifteen.
And if I were still that teenage girl, I’d probably be scheming to figure out a way to get Tyler away from Oksana and to fall in love with me. But Tyler had been beyond clear that all he wanted was a friendship and for boundaries not to be crossed. I could do that. Even if part of me (okay, nearly all of me) resisted. I could respect what he wanted and just enjoy what he did offer, his friendship. I’d just spent the whole day with him. He was a fun guy to hang out with. That could be enough.
I couldn’t really control whether or not I was attracted to him. The constant flutter in my stomach when I looked at him testified that I was. And there was nothing wrong with that. It would only be wrong if I tried to push it to be something more.
If nothing else, at least I was going to get some amazing eye candy out of the deal.
Tyler got our drinks and I saw him looking for me, raising my heartbeat slightly. I waved so that he could see me and he made his way over.
“Thank you,” I said when he gave me my drink.
“My pleasure.”
His words sent little chills up and down my back. I took a sip of my drink, hoping it would cool off my heated skin. It was more than a little ridiculous to be getting so worked up over such an innocent statement.
“So, why a teacher?”
It took me a second to recognize that he had asked me a question. “What do you mean?” Didn’t most people become teachers because they loved teaching? I wasn’t sure exactly what he was trying to get at.
“Based on what you told me earlier, I’m assuming that you’re an heiress.” Well, that wasn’t quite right, but I understood why he’d come to that conclusion. “You don’t really hear about heiresses leaving it all behind to become an elementary school teacher.”
“No, you usually don’t,” I agreed.
“Why did you make that choice?”
This was something I had thought a lot about, because my parents had wondered the same thing. “Growing up, my parents had very specific things they wanted me to focus on. I loved stories and reading and drawing, but they thought those were wastes of time. That I should focus on more serious academics. It was my teachers who encouraged me, made me feel supported. I usually felt unseen and unknown at home. My teachers made me feel seen and heard. I wanted to do the same for other kids.”
He nodded. “I know what that feels like. It’s cool that you wanted to do that for other kids.”
“Nobody should have to feel that way. My family always made me feel like the odd one out. They thought television and movies were vulgar, and they only wanted me to associate with girls who were of our ‘standing.’ Which left me with a lot of time alone to read and daydream. From eight to ten years old, I was convinced that my parents were changeling trolls who had taken me away from my real parents.” I’d never told anyone that before. How alienated and alone I’d always felt, unwanted for not being a boy and for not living up to my parents’ expectations of me. Not wanting to dwell on it too much, I shifted gears. “But I just really love teaching. Seeing a kid’s expression light up when they grasp a concept is amazing. Although sometimes I feel like they teach me more than I teach them.”
“How so?”
“I love when they blow your minds with something you’ve never really considered. Like a couple of days ago we were talking about word pronunciation and letter sounds and this girl in my class, Brinley, came to ask me why all the Cs in Pacific Ocean are pronounced differently. She’s so smart.”
“I can see the appeal.” His gaze was intense and inquisitive, and it made me catch my breath.
Then I wondered if maybe I was painting too rosy a picture, so I said, “It’s usually great. That doesn’t mean it’s not without some hardships. And sometimes I’m not sure what to do. There’s a boy named Denny that I can’t get to stop acting out. I’ve sent his parents a couple of emails and called, but there hasn’t been any response. He’s never had an issue before, and now it’s like he just lives to find ways to get in trouble. I’ve been trying to discipline him, but it seems to make things worse. But even when it’s hard, my classroom is where I feel the most like me. Like I’m finally the person I was meant to be.”
“That’s a real gift,” he said. “Not everyone gets that.”
For some reason, his words hit me hard, sinking deep inside. It was a gift and I loved that he recognized it as such. But he said it like it wasn’t something he had in his own life. “Do you feel that way in your job?”