“Birdie, this is Gretchen, Marmaduke’s dog trainer,” Magdalene said.
“Actually, Gretchen is only my work name. You can call me Sadie.”
Birdie had a confused look on her face. “You have two names?”
I paused. “Yes.”
“I want two names! I’m gonna think about another name.”
Smiling, I said, “It’s kind of fun, I suppose.”
“Are we taking Marmaduke to the dog park?” Birdie asked.
“Yeah, I was thinking I’d let you watch me run through some commands with him, and then I’d have you both try them as well.”
Birdie bolted out of the room. “I’ll get my sweater.” With his tail wagging, Marmaduke followed her down a hallway.
After she returned, Birdie, Magdalene, and I walked together to the park. Well, it was more like Marmaduke ran to the park and took me along with him while Birdie and Magdalene ran behind us. I needed to figure out how to teach him “slow down.”
When we got to our destination, we went in search of a good spot to run our lessons.
Birdie turned to me and asked, “Are you German?”
“No, I’m not.”
“Then how do you teach Marmaduke in German?”
“I taught myself the important words, and I’m going to teach you, too, so that you don’t need me anymore. The goal is to get him to listen to you, and to Magdalene and your dad.”
“Can you teach him not to jump on my daddy’s face in the morning? That’s how Marmaduke wakes him up, and he gets so mad. I’m afraid if he keeps doing it, Daddy will want to give him away.”
“I don’t think your father will do that.”
I probably shouldn’t have made that promise on Sebastian’s behalf. At least I hoped he wouldn’t break his daughter’s heart in such a way.
This time, I came armed with a bag full of treats I’d brought. Having the right kind of reinforcements would hopefully make this easier than last time.
I demonstrated sitz (sit) and platz (down) a few times myself before handing over some of the treats to Birdie. As usual, Marmaduke’s tail was wagging like crazy whenever Birdie took the helm. The level of excitement he had for this little girl was unlike anything else. Birdie squealed in delight the first time the dog listened to her command for a treat. It was truly miraculous how this dog-training thing seemed to be coming together. I really hadn’t thought I could pull this off, but it seemed I was—for now.
But from everything I’d read, proper dog training typically lasted more than just a couple of sessions. There was no way I could just bail after two times without a good reason. So I was going to have to come up with an excuse after today as to why I couldn’t return. Even the thought of that was daunting.
Ironically, we were working on the command for stay, bleib, when Marmaduke did just the opposite after he became distracted by a puppy who’d entered the doggy area. No amount of shouting bleib was going to convince him not to chase after the little animal. It took the three of us to rein Marmaduke in and lead him to the quieter area away from the other dogs. After enticing him with a few more treats, we were able to take a rest with him under a tree. Even though it was cooler out, I was definitely breaking a sweat.
“So, how did you get into this dog-training career?” Magdalene asked.
Oh, you wouldn’t believe.
“It’s not my career. It’s just something I literally fell into. I do it on the side. I have another job.”
“You have two jobs and two names!” Birdie laughed.
Magdalene smiled. “May I ask what your other job is?”
“I write a column for a magazine.”
Her eyes went wide. “Oh, that sounds so fun. What’s the subject?”
“Dating, actually. I sometimes go on dates and write about them.”
Birdie scrunched her nose. “Ew. You have to kiss them?”
I laughed. “No. Definitely not.”
“Good. The only boy I want to kiss is my daddy.”
“And I think your dad will be perfectly fine with that for as long as possible,” I said.
Magdalene and I grinned at each other.
“I bet a lot of the boys want to kiss you,” Birdie added. “You have pretty blonde hair and a nice smile.”
That was sweet.
“Why, thank you, Birdie. Can I tell you a secret?”
She leaned in curiously. “Yes!”
I lowered my voice for effect. “Most days, I’d rather kiss a frog.”
She gasped. “And then he’d turn into a prince! My mommy read me a story like that once.”
My heart clenched. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. I don’t remember it too much. But I know there was a frog and a kiss and a prince.”
“That sounds like a cool story, though.”
She fell silent for a moment before she said, “Do you know my mother died?”
“Yes. I did know that, actually.”
Guilt crept up. Magdalene had told me about Amanda last week, but little did they know I knew way more than anyone could have ever imagined. Suddenly I was reminded of the fact that I was an imposter.
“She died when I was seven.”
I’d promised myself I would do everything in my power not to bond with this little girl today. I needed to let the urge to do that go. Unfortunately, the need to show her that she wasn’t alone was even greater.
“I lost my mom when I was around your age, too.”
The look on her face transformed from one of sadness to wonder. “You did?”
It was as if she’d never heard anyone say that before.
“Yes, I did.”
“What happened to her?”
“She died of cancer.”
“Mine too!”
My heart felt so heavy that I could have sworn it was weighing me down. She looked so relieved to know that someone had been through what she had. It made me happy I’d chosen to open up.
“Did you ever stop thinking about her? I’m afraid I’ll forget her when I get older. I only remember a little now.”
Trying to reassure her, I said, “I never forgot the things I remembered when I was your age. Because those memories are so important and precious that they are branded into us. And I have a great dad who also made sure I never forgot her, either. But you know the number one reason you’ll never be able to forget her?”
“What?”
I pointed to my heart. “Because she’s right here. Always. She’s a part of you and you carry her inside your heart every day. You can’t forget your own heart and you won’t.”
Birdie closed her eyes and whispered, “Yeah. Okay.”
This moment was one I would never forget. Even if I never saw Birdie again, at least I knew I was able to make her feel a little less alone in this world. The entire time she’d been communicating with me as Santa, the one thing I’d always wanted to say to her was: “Me too. I know how you’re feeling.”
“I’m really happy I met you. I’ve never met anyone who lost their mom young like me.”
I couldn’t help but smile. “Well, maybe we were meant to meet, so you could know there are other people out there just like you.”
Magdalene’s eyes were glistening.