“Anything else?”
“It’s either him or me.”
“He owns the building.”
“Can’t you do something?”
“Like what? Tell Lucien to be a nicer person, to stop smoking, cussing, insulting people, telling dirty jokes, to sober up? In case you haven’t noticed, Roxy, no one tells Lucien Wilbanks to do anything.”
She grabbed a tissue and wiped her cheeks. “I can’t take it.”
This was the perfect opening and Jake wasn’t about to miss an opportunity. “Let’s call it resignation,” he said with compassion. “I’ll be happy to provide a good reference.”
“I’m being fired?”
“No. You’re resigning, effective immediately. Leave now and you’ve got the day off. I’ll send your last paycheck.”
The emotion turned to anger as she looked around her desk. She was gone in ten minutes, slamming doors behind her. Portia walked in promptly at 9:00 and said, “I just passed Roxy on the street and she wouldn’t speak to me.”
“She’s gone. Here’s the offer. On a temporary basis, you can work down here as the secretary and receptionist. You’ll be considered a paralegal, not a lowly intern. It’s a big promotion all the way around.”
She absorbed it coolly, said, “My typing is not great.”
“Then practice.”
“What does it pay?”
“A thousand dollars a month for two months, a trial run. After two months, we’ll take a look and reevaluate.”
“Hours?”
“Eight thirty to five, thirty minutes for lunch.”
“What about Lucien?” she asked.
“What about him?”
“He’s down here. I kinda like it up there, on the second floor, where it’s safe.”
“Has he bothered you?”
“Not yet. Look, Jake, I like Lucien and we work well together, but I sometimes get the feeling he would like to get a little closer, know what I mean?”
“I think so.”
“If he touches me, I’ll slap his ass across the room.”
Jake laughed at the visual, and there was no doubt whatsoever Portia could take care of herself. He said, “I need to have a chat with Lucien. Let me handle it. I’ll warn him.”
Portia took a deep breath and looked around the office. She nodded, smiled, said, “But I’m not a secretary, Jake. I’m going to be a lawyer, just like you.”
“And I’ll help you in every way possible.”
“Thank you.”
“I want an answer. Now. On the spot.”
“But I don’t want to miss the trial. If I’m stuck at this desk, I’ll miss the trial, right?”
“Let’s worry about that later. Right now I need you down here.”
“Okay.”
“So we have a deal?”
“No. A thousand a month is too low for a secretary, receptionist, and paralegal all rolled into one.”
Jake threw up his hands and knew he was beaten. “Well, then, what do you have in mind?”
“Two thousand is more in line with the market.”
“What in hell do you know about the market?”
“Not much, but I know a thousand a month is too cheap.”
“Okay. Fifteen hundred a month for the first two months, then we’ll take a look.”
She lunged forward, gave him a quick and proper hug, and said, “Thanks, Jake.”
An hour later, Jake dealt with the second office personnel crisis of the morning. Lucien barged in with hardly a knock and fell into a chair. “Jake, son,” he began in a tone that meant trouble, “I’ve made a decision. For months, even years now I’ve been wrestling with the decision about whether to begin the reinstatement process, sort of start my comeback, you know?”
Jake, who was hard at work drafting a response to a motion filed by Stillman Rush, slowly put down his pen and managed to look thoughtfully at Lucien. The word “comeback” had not been used until that point, but in the past three months Lucien had managed to drop every other possible hint that he wanted to become a lawyer again. Though he feared it was coming, this news still put Jake on a tightrope. He didn’t want Lucien around, especially Lucien as a lawyer because Lucien as an untitled and unpaid adviser had already worn thin. Lucien as a lawyer meant Lucien, the Boss, and Jake wouldn’t last. But, Lucien the friend was the man who’d given Jake a job, an office, a career, and was as loyal as anyone.
“Why?” Jake asked.
“I miss it, Jake. I’m too young to sit on the porch. Will you support me?”
The only answer was yes, and Jake quickly said, “Of course, you know I will. But how?”
“Moral support, Jake, at first anyway. As you know, before I can be reinstated I have to pass the bar exam, no small feat for an old fart like me.”
“You’ve done it once before, you can do it again,” Jake said with requisite conviction. He seriously doubted if Lucien could, starting from scratch, grind through a six-month cram session, studying on his own while trying to lay off the sour mash.
“So, you’re on board?”
“On board how, Lucien? After you’re reinstated, what then? You want this office back? You want me around as the flunky? Do we go back to where we were eight, nine years ago?”
“I don’t know, but we’ll figure it out, Jake. I’m sure we can.”
Jake shrugged and said, “Yes, I’m on board, and I’ll help in any way.” And for the second time that morning, Jake lent his assistance to a budding lawyer in his office. Who could be next?
“Thanks.”
“While you’re here, a couple of housekeeping matters. Roxy quit and Portia is the interim secretary. She’s allergic to cigar smoke so please go outside. And keep your hands to yourself. She spent six years in the Army, knows hand-to-hand combat, plus karate, and she does not fancy the thought of a creepy old white man pawing at her. Touch her, and she’ll crack your teeth, then sue me for sexual harassment. Got it?”
“She said this? I swear I’ve done nothing.”
“It’s just a warning, Lucien, okay? Don’t touch her, don’t tell her dirty jokes or make suggestive comments, don’t even swear in her presence, and don’t drink or smoke around her. She thinks she’s a lawyer and wants to become one. Treat her like a professional.”
“I thought we were getting on just fine.”
“Perhaps, but I know you. Keep it straight and clean.”
“I’ll try.”
“Do more than try. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll get back to work.”
Leaving, Lucien mumbled just loud enough for Jake to hear, “She does have a nice ass.”
“Drop it Lucien.”
On a typical Friday afternoon, it was almost impossible to find a judge in the courthouse or a lawyer in his office. The weekend began early as they all sneaked away in various modes. A lot of fish were caught. A lot of beer consumed. A lot of legal business got delayed until Monday. And on dreary Friday afternoons in January, lawyers and nonlawyers alike quietly closed their offices early and left the square.