"A little bit. What about you? What's going on with your frenemy?"
We got married. We got married. We got married. "Why?" I hedge, already chickening out. "What did you hear?"
"What would I have heard?" Violet repeats back to me like I'm crazy. "Was Mom supposed to update me on your sex life?"
"Haha. No, I guess not." Damn, I've got to tell my parents I got married too. I wonder if there's a window of time allowed for announcing an elopement? Surely you can't be expected to announce it immediately, am I right? I mean, why go through all the effort of not inviting anyone to your wedding if you're just going to tell them about it a couple days later? Right? "What about your British lover? Did you elope? I won't be mad if you did. Just throwing that out there. Random FYI." So not random. But how great would it be if Violet eloped this week too? Then I'd just have to say 'Twin win! Me too!' and that would be that.
"Err, no," Violet says, her voice changing. "We definitely did not elope." Oh, crap. Violet sounds like she's about to cry. What in the hell went wrong? She was nearly in love with him the last time I spoke to her.
"What happened?"
"I don't know. He just... left."
Been there, sister.
"What do you mean he just left? Elaborate."
"He ghosted me the last night of the tour. He missed the final group dinner, and then just sorta disappeared on me. It's not like he promised me anything, but I thought... I thought something was happening between us, you know? Something big."
Yeah, I do know.
"You could email him," I suggest. "You have his contact information from the tour itinerary so it's not like he's unreachable." Been there, done that.
"Fuck him!" Violet says in a random burst of indignation. "I left him a note. At the front desk, letting him know he's an arsehole."
"Violet, you did not."
"I did!" She's perked up a little with the mention of her note.
"Did you actually write ‘arsehole’ instead of ‘asshole?’" Violet's adorable. How could anyone not love her?
"I did. Arsehole."
"Arsehole!"
We're both laughing until Violet turns serious.
"I wish he hadn't made me fall for him. You know? If it'd just been hot sex and a great British accent, maybe it wouldn't hurt so much. But it felt like something wonderful was happening. Something bigger. And I never even got to tell him I wasn't you."
"Oh, right, he still thinks your name is Daisy." Yup. That's super weird.
"Yeah. But you know what's crazy? It's like he sorta knew, because he almost never called me Daisy. He also said he wouldn't have guessed me for a Daisy and I was so offended, you know?"
"No, I don't know." I really don't, since Daisy is my name and it's served me well.
"Because I always imagined you as the fun sister. And that perhaps if Mom had just named me Daisy and you Violet I'd have been the fun one all along."
Oh.
Well, I am the fun sister, she's not wrong.
But she's the good sister. And that's what I tell her.
"Listen, Vi, I think you were always meant to be a Violet and I was always meant to be a Daisy. Mom could have named me Mildred and I'd still have gotten myself into all kinds of jams. They could have given you a stripper name and you'd still have been an honor roll student. Some destinies you just can't fight. And I've always wished I had a little more of you in me."
"Same. Maybe that's why we're twins, to push each other out of our comfort zones."
I nod, even though she can't see me. "Hey, so what did he call you then, if not Daisy?"
"Love." She sighs when she says it. "He was always calling me ‘love’ and it was so stereotypically British but it really did it for me."
"Fair enough."
"When are you coming home?"
Crap. Now is really not the time to bring up my surprise wedding, not on the heels of her heartbreak. I run my hand through the safety blanket of Tubb’s fur while contemplating what to tell her. ‘I think I live in Philadelphia now’ is probably not the icebreaker I'm looking for. "I'm exploring a few opportunities, so I think it's going to be a while. But the good news is, you're welcome to stay at my place as long as you like! How is the job hunt going by the way? Any new leads?" I bite my lip, hoping she's going to accept that as an answer. Tubbs and I stare at each other while we wait for Violet to respond.
"Actually, yes." She pauses for a long moment and I wonder if I'm going to have to drag the news out of her or if she's still contemplating an attempt to drag my secrets out of me. "I've got an interview in London," she finally says.
"London? London, England? That's like, across the ocean, Violet!"
Cue panic. I don't want her to go to London! It's not that we're not attached at the hip or anything, we went to colleges clear across the country from one another, but another continent? What if I need her?
Except wait. Isn't this what I wanted? For Violet to live her life and not worry about me? Didn't I specifically hide this pregnancy from her, hoping she'd find a job first and move out so she wouldn't hold herself back trying to take care of me?
I did.
And I still want those things for Violet.
"Tell me about London," I urge while reminding myself that a flight from Philadelphia to London can't be much more than seven hours. And my new husband is loaded so I can afford an international flight. Okay, that sounded real gold digger of me but the thing is, he doesn't need my help paying the mortgage. I'm not even sure he has a mortgage.
The pre-nup actually spells that out. Living expenses paid by Kyle. Child-rearing expenses paid by Kyle. Medical expenses, Kyle. Family travel, Kyle. Which doesn't leave a whole lot left for me to pay for, so if I want to spend all of my own income on international airfare to visit Violet, I'm free to do so.
If we ever get divorced I don't get a KINGS store, I can tell you that much. I get three million dollars per year of marriage. Three million freaking dollars. Per. Year. And I get it while we’re still married. Kyle said it’s so I have access to my own funds. There are also larger sums—too gross to mention—every decade.
I told him I didn't want it. I told him it made me feel kind of gross, like this entire thing was a transaction. Kyle said that if I signed off on a pre-nup accepting nothing it would never stand up in court, so this protected us both. He also said I might change my mind someday, and if I don't, I could drop the cash off in a duffle bag and walk away.
I think he meant that as a joke but it's a valid point.
He also said it's a safety net for me so that I never have to stay with him if I don't want to, and that I should be asking for more. He looked a little uncomfortable when he said that, and I wondered if the entire thing wasn't as weird for him as it was for me. Imagine having so much money you have to quantify in advance how much you will give to someone else in the event of a breakup because if you don't you've opened yourself to a parade of lawsuits?
It's weird.