Shattered

~MARI~

I love this. It's a rush, so much more than I thought it would be. Standing on stage, feeling the lights on my skin. There's no way to describe it. Add to the fact that I'm Trystan's co-star and it feels like a dream. Everything about him is contagious. He's dazzling on stage. He connects with me, calls to me, like we're two ends of the same string. I feel him tugging by just listening to his voice. It's magic and it's all Trystan.

I want to run and throw my arms around his neck when we take a break. I want to have that comfortable feeling of being close to him, but I can't. It's easier this way, I keep telling myself. Katie will have a stroke and I really don't need more crap from Seth or Brie right now. It's better that no one knows.

I smirk at Trystan. He returns the look with his blue eyes sparkling, before I run down the staircase on the side of the stage and up an aisle. I need a drink. I don't know how Trystan does it, especially since I know his throat is still sore from last night, but he's talking like nothing ever happened. It makes me wonder how many times he came in to school broken and battered and I didn't notice.

That smile of his hides so much pain.

Blinking hard, I push through the doors and smack into Brie. She's instantly irritated. "Watch where you're going, heifer." Brie shakes her head and her golden hair settles onto her shoulders before she shoves past me and into the auditorium.

I glance after her, wondering what she's doing here. I decide not to overreact. She's not a threat. Her part was given to me. It's not like Tucker will just hand it back. I turn and walk the few paces to the water fountain and drink. The water cools my throat.

When I walk back into the theater, I stand at the back half-wall, draping my arms on it. It's right when you walk in and separates the seats from the back aisle and the doors. Brie is a couple rows in front of me. She's slouched in a seat, but when they mess up the lights and blind everyone, Trystan turns around. For a moment, there's a halo of golden light around him. I smile. He looks like his video. My eyes drift to Brie. I wonder if she notices. If she does, she doesn't say anything.

A moment later Seth settles on the wall next to me. His voice is low, his lips barely moving, "What's the tramp doing here?"

"I don't know, but I don't like it. She's messed with Trystan enough to last a lifetime. I wish she'd fall down a hole or something."

Seth turns his face toward me and lifts a brow. "Is that venom from Little Goodie Two Shoes? I'm impressed."

"It's not unjustified." I watch Trystan dangling his legs off the side of the stage. I watch Brie watching him. It makes me nervous. He has enough pain in his life. He doesn't need anything else to go wrong. "She's got Trystan in her crosshairs."

He nods and looks back at his friend. Seth's expression softens and he sighs. "You care about him?"

"I'm not going to dignify that with a response," I say, tightly.

"I'm just saying, if you do - help me keep an eye on that one. I got his back for most of the day, but when he's in here..."

I glance at Seth. He's staring at Trystan unblinking. I wonder if he knows. Instead of asking, I lower my gaze and nod. "Done." Before Seth can say anything else and ruin my new, higher opinion of him, I walk back toward the stage.

Brie stands at the same time and smiles at me. It's one of those smiles that's good and pure, but when it's coming from someone like her, you know it's an evil omen. I narrow my eyes into slits as I pass her. She's trying to spook me. What could Brie possibly do to make life worse?

Tucker claps his large hands and thunder booms through the empty room. "Back on stage. Let's repeat the end of that last scene so the lighting guys can get their glitch fixed. Come on! Let's go!" He waives his arm toward the stage in a sweeping motion.

I climb the stairs and go back to the wing opposite Trystan. My stomach does a free fall when I see him. In the shadows, across the stage, Trystan looks up at me through his dark hair. He winks and I feel the need to giggle hysterically. I hear my cue and walk on stage. We run the scene two more times until lights and sound are at one hundred percent.

Tucker is pleased. Instead of pinching his nose, he's smiling at us. He stands at the edge of the stage. "You guys should be proud. You worked hard and it's obvious. Mari, thank you for stepping in at the last second. You are a perfect fit for this part. I hope to see you in more productions next year." I nod and smile awkwardly. Everyone looks at me. Trystan is standing next to me and bumps my shoulder with his. It attracts Tucker's attention. "And you, Scott. Try to refrain from doing anything stupid. We need you here, in one piece, tomorrow night." He rubs his palms together. "All right! Get out of here. See everyone back tomorrow night at 5:00pm. Don't be late!"

Trystan and I walk away from each other. I glance at him over my shoulder briefly. He's laughing, talking to Sophie about something. God, could she flirt with him more? Just as I'm thinking it, Trystan turns back and grins at me. I smile, and roll my eyes.

After I collect my stuff from backstage, I realize that I forgot a book and head back to my locker. The hallways are empty and the lights are off. I'm not supposed to be wandering the halls. I stop in front of my locker and rest my head on the metal, wondering how to help Trystan. I wish I could snap my fingers and make everything better for both of us.

"Are you holding up the wall with that pretty head of yours?" Trystan says softly. I turn my face and glance down the hall. He's standing with his hands in his pockets a few lockers down.

I sigh and straighten. "Someone has to."

He walks towards me, and his smile slips off his lips. Trystan is serious and that makes me more nervous than anything else. "Thank you. For not saying anything about last night. I know you're hurt." He's actually talking about it. When I tried to ask him this morning, he wasn't ready. But he is now.

"I know you're hurt. I wish I knew. I wish you'd told me." I can't look at him. Guilt is swallowing me whole. I'm the crappiest friend alive. I had no idea, none at all.

"There was nothing you could have done. Mari, this shit is normal. The cops don't even come anymore. I'm lucky they didn't toss me in jail last night. I'm eighteen. That arrest would have been permanent. I got lucky this time. There can't be a next time." He's next to me. His voice is soft, his breath is in my ear.

I know he wants me to turn to look at him, but I can't. Something is strangling me from the inside. I want to fix this. I know I can help him, at least a little bit. I know he can't go home anymore. I know he has no clothes. These are things I can offer. Before I even realize what I'm saying, the words are out of my mouth. "Then, stay with me. Hide out at my house until you graduate." I glance at him from the corner of my eye. My heart is beating too hard, too fast.

He laughs. "Your dad hates me - "

"My dad's never home. Last night after everything that happened, he didn't even call to see if I was all right. He stayed and worked his entire shift. The only thing he cares about is work and my mother." Trystan's eyes search my face. I turn toward him and press my back into the lockers. A sad smile lines my lips. Glancing at his chest, I say, "I shouldn't complain. Compared to you - "

He shakes his head. Dark hair falls in his eyes. Trystan's hands land on my shoulders. "Don't say that. Compared to me, you have your own hell. Compared to me, you're in just as much pain. I see it, Mari. It's written on your face and chiseled into your heart."

Trystan's eyes lower for a moment. His hand slips across my cheek, leaving a warm trail on my cool skin. "I wish I could take it away," he breathes. "I wish they'd see how wonderful and special and amazing you are. I don't know how your parents can't see that. They must be blind.

"You outshine the sun, Mari. And I'm not just saying that. It's true. When I look at you..." he breathes hard and rests his head against mine. "I see everything I ever wanted and more." By the time he finishes, his voice is a whisper.

I don't look at his eyes. I'll fall apart. Moving slowly, Trystan brushes his lips across my cheek. Every part of me reacts to his touch, to him. I'm breathing too hard. It's too hot. Trystan pulls back. There's a breath between us and no more. My heart hammers inside of me. We're like two magnets, slightly separated, pulling toward each other. When I lift my gaze to meet his, I melt. My lips part and I breathe. Trystan lowers his lashes and watches my mouth. I'm falling. I'm lost in his gaze.

Trystan is about to kiss me when a jarring voice slams through the hall.

"Oh, no. Not this shit again. Scott, you said you were over this." Seth walks toward us. His boots echo up and down the hall. He's as graceful as a gorilla with concrete sneakers.

Trystan gives me a look that says he's sorry and a million other things. Before Seth gets closer, he leans in and whispers in my ear, "I'll come. After seven?" I nod. Trystan's eyes meet mine and the only thing I want is his arms around me.

He winks at me and turns away. Trystan is all swagger and charm. He struts away saying, "You know how much I like to tease her." He looks over his shoulder at me. I play back and give him a pointed expression. Trystan laughs and grabs Seth's shoulders, pulling him away from me. "Come on. Let's grab dinner. I'm starving."

Seth looks at Trystan and then back at me, saying, "We had an understanding Jennings and this isn't part of it." Seth gives me a hostile look and points his finger at me. "You're back on my shit list."

"I was never off your shit list," I huff and slam my locker door. I walk down the hall and shove past them, adding, "And I don't really care if I'm on your list or not, Seth. Have fun making out with yourself, Sexbot." I feel their eyes on me.

My heart is flying, soaring so high, so fast. Trystan said yes. He'll stay over. Nothing could ruin this night. Nothing.