When he’s seated fully inside me, I let out a little whimper. A rush of feelings washes over me. Front and centre is anxiety, but I push it aside, and focus on the man beneath me. He swallows hard, and I can see it’s taking every ounce of self-control not to move his hips.
Slowly, I pull myself up off him nearly to the tip and then push back down on him. Tyler tries to give me the control I need, but he’s not built to be a passive passenger either. His hips start to move and he pushes deep inside me before pulling back, over and over. I let him take control, my hands pressed against his chest as I move in time with his rhythm. My breaths are coming in sharp little pants now. His hands grip my hips as I move against him, rotating my pelvis to drive him deeper inside me.
My orgasm hits first, and I moan as I jerk on his cock. Then I feel him twitch beneath me as he shoots his load into the condom. I collapse onto his chest, feeling him slip out of me, hating the loss of him, but when his arms wrap around me, I snuggle into him.
“I love you, Tyler. Don’t ever forget that.”
There’s a long moment of silence. “I love you too, baby. Always.”
33
Ravage
Sasha dozes for a while after we fuck, and I leave her to sleep. It’s good to see. She needs the rest. She’s been working so hard, taking care of Lily-May and trying to work through the nightmares my brother left behind. I doubt she’s had any peaceful nights for a long time.
I shouldn’t have let things go as far as they did between us, but we both needed each other. I wanted to take things slow with her, get her comfortable with me again. I never wanted to use her body to soothe my own pain, but I couldn’t stop myself from taking what was offered. I needed her more than I’ve ever needed anyone. I still need her. Sasha does what I can’t do for myself. She appeases the savage beast inside me, makes me feel less broken.
Taking her pussy, connecting our bodies, helped put some of my monsters back in their boxes. I feel level-headed again, surer of my decisions. I know it’ll take me a long time to come to terms with what I did to my brother. I know I’ll feel the pain until my last breath is taken, but I know deep down it had to happen. Sasha was right when she said he wasn’t the James I remembered. Something had changed in him, twisting his mind. As long as he was breathing, Sin would continue to be a danger to Sasha. I know he would have killed her; that his obsession ran too deep for any other outcome. I couldn’t have him out there like that. Sasha would never be able to move on.
I know I can’t have the old Sasha back. I’m not the same man she remembers. She’s also scarred by her past. She’ll have to carry those marks with her, just as I will, but she is regaining some of that previous fire I loved about her. I can see it in her eyes, in the way she looks at me. Every piece of her I put back is redemption. I should never have trusted anyone else with the most important thing in my world. I won’t make that mistake again.
I peer at her face, dark purple bruises starting to appear along her cheeks, and my jaw clenches. She got hurt on my watch, and that’s something I’ll never forgive myself for. I’ll spend a lifetime making that up to her.
“Ty.”
She stirs and I watch as her beautiful eyes find mine. Her smile slays me. How did I go without her this long? How did I let her walk away?
I watch as she struggles to sit up in the bed, the sheet dropping to reveal dark nipples. My eyes slide to them before moving up to her face.
“Sleep okay?”
“Yeah. What time is it?”
“After seven.”
Her eyes flare and she pushes back the blankets. “We should get back to the hospital. Lily—”
“Will be fine with Lucy and Kyle.”
She leans over in the bed and presses her mouth to mine before she says, “I need to see my baby.”
How can I refuse her or Lily-May anything?
“Get dressed.”
I watch as she climbs out of bed and pulls on her jeans from the other night. Getting out too, I pull on my own boxers and jeans before moving over to the dresser. I find two clean tees in the drawer and toss her one, shrugging into the other myself. The tee, an old Harley one, swims on her, but seeing her in my clothes makes my cock twitch. Possessiveness washes through me and I move over to her, my hands skimming up the back of the tee to the bare skin of her back as I crash my mouth onto hers.
I feel her melt against me as I deepen the kiss, but I pull away before I get too carried away and we end up in bed again.
Breathless, she peers up at me. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Treating me like I’m normal.”
“You are normal.” I brush her hair back from her face. “Let’s go and see our girl.”
She nods, and I see the reluctance to release me in her expression as she pulls away from me to continue dressing. I like that it’s there.
Snagging my kutte off the floor where it was dropped earlier, I shrug into it and settle it into place. Then I hold my hand out to Sasha.
She takes it without hesitation and I lead her out of the clubhouse. I don’t take her to my bike, instead leading her to one of the pool cars we use when we need four wheels instead of two. She’d probably be okay on the back of a bike, but Whizz also said she has a concussion. I’m not risking her falling off.
Sasha doesn’t question it as she climbs into the car and waits for me to take off my kutte and turn it inside out before I get into the cage. I don’t ride in cages with my colours on display ever.
As we drive, she tells me stories about Lily-May. I listen to her words, feeling pride bubbling in my stomach.
When we reach the hospital, I can see the tension rolling through my woman, the eagerness to get to our daughter. I feel it too. Together, we walk into the building and head for the children’s department.
As we approach the room, Kyle rises from his seat outside the door. His eyes go to Sasha’s face, and I see him taking in the bruises and cuts with curiosity.
“Everything been okay?” Sash demands.
He nods and we push into the room. Lucy straightens in the chair at the side of the bed and I clock the moment she sees Sasha’s face. Her expression moves from smiley to downright homicidal, as her eyes lock onto my face.
“What the fuck happened?”
The unspoken insinuation that I did it has me growling under my breath. I’d never lay a finger on Sasha like that. That she would accuse me pisses me off as much as it impresses me. Not many women, fuck, not many men, would stand up to me like that. Sash has a good friend here.
“What the fuck are you accusing me of?” My anger flares. I’m guilty of many things and I’ve done a lot of shit that has stained my soul over the years, but I’ve never raised a hand to a woman and I’m not about to start.
“He didn’t do anything to me,” Sasha says to Lucy. I like her taking my corner. “It was Sin.”
Lucy’s eyes widen, a ripple of shock going through her.
“Sin did this?”
“I’m okay,” she assures her, her hand resting on her arm. “Ty wouldn’t hurt me, Luce. Not ever.”
“Sorry,” she mutters an apology.
I should be the bigger person and accept it, but I shrug.