Dax nodded. “Love doesn’t appear in that sentence anywhere.”
“Well, let’s see,” Ollie said, licking an orange muffin crumb from his finger. “You’ve felt lust and curiosity and affection for women before. You’ve also felt frustration and annoyance and fear.”
“Fear was one time, one girl, and that was all her, not me,” Dax protested. “She was a nutjob.”
He’d actually had a stalker for a while. She was very into Warriors of Easton and had been obsessed with its creators. Once she’d met Dax and Ollie at a few cons, she’d latched on to Dax. She showed up everywhere, sent him emails and letters and packages, posted on fan forums. It had been over the top, and the packages with her panties in them had been a lot, but it hadn’t been until she’d broken into his hotel room and he’d come in to find her in a full Warriors of Easton princess costume—complete with a sword—that he’d really gotten concerned.
He’d called Grant at 3 a.m. about that one. Grant had been just a few doors down and had been there, with the cops, in minutes.
“I’m just saying,” Ollie replied. “That you’ve felt a lot of things for a lot of women, so to say you’ve never felt this way before only leaves a few emotions. And,” he added, “this orange muffin is freaking amazing.”
Okay, Ollie had a point. Dax hadn’t really been trying to label what he felt for Jane, but it was very different, new, unique. And he loved that at least. He wanted to be with her all the time. He wanted to know all about her. He wanted to make everything better for her. Around her. For the people she cared about. If anything was even touching her life and wasn’t exactly what she wanted it to be, he wanted to fix it. He knew he couldn’t. He did acknowledge that. But he wanted to and that was new. The only people he felt that way about were his mother, the men in this room, Cam, and Piper.
“All I know is I want to be with her, and Hot Cakes is in the way, so I want to get rid of it.”
“Is it Jane?” Aiden asked, watching Dax with an expression that was part surprise and part concern.
“Yes,” Dax told him, meeting his gaze directly.
Aiden nodded. Jane was a friend of his. They’d gone to high school together. Zoe, Aiden’s girlfriend, was one of Jane’s best friends. It was important Aiden know Dax wasn’t just fucking around here.
That was also new. Usually Dax didn’t care if people thought he wasn’t taking things seriously. He knew what he was serious about and gave those things his all. What other people thought didn’t matter. Unless it was Grant, Aiden, Ollie, or Cam.
And there was also a niggle at the back of his mind that said he wanted everyone to know he was serious about Jane.
Which was interesting, because until that very moment, he hadn’t even told himself he was serious about her. He just didn’t get serious very often, about anything.
“You don’t have to give up your part of the business,” Ollie said. “That’s ridiculous.”
“She won’t date me because I’m her boss.”
Ollie snorted. “You’re not really her boss.”
“I own the company she works for,” Dax said. “At least a percentage of it. That does make me her boss.”
Grant lifted a brow. He was clearly surprised Dax would argue with Ollie but probably more so that Dax would consider himself a boss.
“And you want to date her that much?” Grant asked.
Dax shrugged. “I need to see what can happen with her more than I need to own twenty percent of a snack cake company.”
“You need to see what will happen with her?” Aiden echoed. “What could happen? You go out, have some fun, have some sex, and then you leave, right? Is that really worth giving up an investment like this?” His tone wasn’t confrontational though. He sounded more curious.
“I think there’s a chance there’s more there,” Dax admitted. For the first time out loud but probably for the first time to himself too. “She’s… amazing. Different than most women I know.”
“Worth giving up millions for?” Ollie asked.
Dax nodded. “Yeah.” He could admit it helped that he’d still have millions in the bank. He didn’t want to blow this “sacrifice” out of proportion. He wasn’t giving up fame and fortune here.
“And you want to make this grand gesture, right?” Grant asked. “That’s pretty typical. Do something big and crazy to make a point.”
It was totally typical. “Well, the thing is,” Dax said, “and I’m sure you’ll find this amusing,” he told Grant specifically, “I’m not sure she’ll go out with me anyway.”
“No?” Grant asked. “When you take the one thing she’s worried about out of the equation?”
Dax shook his head. “I think the boss thing is a convenient excuse. There’s more reasons why she doesn’t want to let me too close. But I’m definitely up for showing her I’m serious here.”
Aiden was watching him carefully. “Jane is special,” he said. “She’s not at all like your usual girls.”
Dax nodded. “I promise you I realize that. I won’t hurt her.”
Aiden gave him a small smile. “I think I’m more afraid that she’ll hurt you, man.”
Dax frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Jane doesn’t have time for anything extra, anything silly or outrageous.”
Dax gave him a nod. Aiden’s words jabbed him in the chest. “Got it. I’m silly and outrageous.”
“You are,” Aiden agreed. “Intentionally.”
“Maybe Jane needs a little silliness in her life.”
“Maybe,” Aiden said. “But that’s going to be short term. The seriousness in her life isn’t going to go away. You’re not going to be able to just help her through a tough time and make it go away. That tough time is her reality.”
And Aiden didn’t think Dax had what it took to help someone through a tough time on any kind of ongoing basis.
That hurt.
But the worst part? Dax thought maybe Aiden was right. He’d helped his mom through her lowest periods, but he certainly hadn’t been able to get her to a happy place on any kind of permanent basis.
“And this is going to hurt me how?” Dax asked Aiden.
“You’re going to have to eventually just let it be what it is. And that’s hard for you. You keep trying to reform your dad, for God’s sake, and everyone knows he’s the man he’s going to be.”
Dax really hated this whole fucking conversation suddenly.
“Just buy my shares out, and then when this all goes to shit, you can buy me a five-pound bag of gummy bears and get me black-out drunk,” Dax said.
“Is that how you deal with broken hearts?” Ollie asked.
Dax could honestly say he’d never had a broken heart. Not over a woman anyway. He looked at his best friends and shrugged. “Fuck if I know.”
8
The next day sucked.
Not because of the tequila shot or the later-than-usual night out at the bar or the fact that she’d had a hard time falling asleep because of all the thoughts of Dax and that kiss running through her head.