Time Untime

"What aren't you telling me?" Kateri asked with a very subtle drop in octave that told him she suspected she should be afraid. But other than that, she hid her panic well.

Damn. Ren should have recognized who she was the moment they met. Strange how the mind colored things and hid them from conscious thought. How something could be right under your nose and you missed it entirely ...

Now that he knew the truth of her, it was obvious, and he had no idea how he could have been so stupid as to have been blind to it.

While her features and height were nothing like the First Guardian's, she had his same eerie gold-tinged eyes that held a probing, deep intensity that seemed to strip away all lies, bravado, and pretenses so that their owner could see straight into the naked soul.

The first time he'd met the Guardian, that penetrating stare had reduced him back to the cowering dog that had lived only to gain his father's approval. The pathetic shadow of a human who'd allowed his own brother to walk all over him while he protected the bastard with his blood and bone. The dog that had accepted the kicks of everyone who came into contact with him, thinking he deserved nothing better than their contempt.

For most of his life, Ren had honestly believed that rather than be angry or bitter, he should be grateful that anyone was willing to offer him a home at all. Dignity was something reserved for his betters.

As much as he'd convinced himself that he hated his father and Coyote over how they'd treated him, the truth was he'd hated himself more. He had been the one to swallow their abuse and say nothing. The one who had allowed them to treat him as if he was lesser.

All the while, he'd had the strength and skills to silence them. But rather than risk his "home" and what little security he knew, he'd taken their verbal assault and made himself believe that he couldn't exist on his own.

That he really was weaker.

And the moment the First Guardian had looked into his eyes and stripped away the vengeance-seeking monster Windseer had awakened so that he was again a vulnerable human, Ren had unleashed that hatred all over the ancient for daring to see the truth. But in the end, the First Guardian had been right. It wasn't the First Guardian Ren had ferociously battled for that entire year so much as himself.

He, and no other, had always been his worst enemy.

Anyone else would have condemned Ren for his past atrocities and demanded his life. Instead, the First Guardian had embraced him like a brother. You allowed someone you loved to blind you with her lies. You trusted in her to look after a fragile heart that had never beat with acceptance before. While you committed evil at her command, the evil wasn't inside you. You took no pleasure or comfort from your actions. No pride.

I see your heart, Makah'Alay. You are shamed and horrified by what you've done. You know how wrong it was and you don't hide from that fact. You flog yourself far worse than I ever could.

But what you have to remember is that there are only two men in life who are perfect. The one not yet born and the one who has died. We all make mistakes. It's part of growing. The trick isn't to be perfect. It's to find a place of solace in the mind so that it doesn't cane you for trusting the wrong person or following after the wrong dream. All of us fall victim to harmful guile at some point.

Even I.

But hatred and rage solve nothing. Like a mighty fire, they quickly consume whatever is fed them. Yet it can't last. Soon enough, they devour all around them and burn out, leaving nothing but a hollowed shell no longer capable of feeling anything at all.

You, Makah'Alay, are the mighty Thunderbird. Born of human sorrow, you are the bringer of storms that swept through the land, destroying everything in its path.

Now spent, it is humble and giving. A protector who will sacrifice his life to save another.

How could I ever fault or punish that?

The cycle of the universe is birth, growth, death. And death, while unwelcome, is always necessary. Without death, there is no birth and no growth.

Most men die many times in their lives. The man we become invariably slaughters the child we once were. His knowledge of the world murders the babe's innocence. With the step you have just taken, the wise Makah'Alay has now laid the warrior Makah'Alay to rest. While you still know how to fight, you have now learned when to fight....

And most important, what to fight for.

Others and not himself. The First Guardian hadn't said the last four words, but that had been the lesson Ren had learned. Until the First Guardian had spared him, he'd always fought for his own glory, even while he claimed he was fighting for Coyote and his father. He hadn't really been protecting his brother. He'd been hoping that his father would take notice of his skills. That his father would, just once, embrace him and be proud to call him son.

But no one could change the mind of someone else. That was for them to do. And if they weren't willing, then there was no magic in existence to make them see what they didn't want to see.

His father had never held any use for him.

It wasn't my opinions that changed. It was my perceptions. That had always been Buffalo's quip whenever someone accused him of capriciousness.

Now, centuries later, Ren stared into the same pair of eyes that had once motivated him to murder....

"How much do you know about your father?" he asked her.

"Nothing really. My mother didn't speak about him. My grandmother told me the memories were too painful for her to bear and that I shouldn't mention him around her. So I never did."

"Your mother still won't speak of him?"

"My mother died when I was a girl."

So that was it, then. The First Guardian must have known that the Ixkib's line would die out and so he'd intervened to protect that from happening during one of their most crucial times. Knowing her mother would perish, he'd given her a child so that there would be a new Ixkib to carry on.

Which still begged the question of where the First Guardian was now. It wasn't like him to be missing while his daughter was in danger.

Maybe she's not really his daughter.

But he knew better. Between the mark all Guardians had and her eyes ...

He had no doubt about her. While her powers lay dormant, they were still present to anyone who looked past the surface. In all his life, he'd only been defeated one time.

By her father. And even then, it hadn't been through her father's superior battle skills. Rather, the First Guardian had won the fight mentally. He'd verbally stripped Ren bare and left him exposed until his will to fight was gone.

It was the dirtiest trick anyone had ever used on him. And given his past, that said a lot.

She arched one probing brow. "What are you hiding from me?"

"What do you mean?"

"I've always had the ability to know whenever someone was keeping a secret. You have a deep one. I can feel it."

Oh yeah, she was definitely the daughter. No one else had ever been able to read his moods-not the way the First Guardian had.

And he really wasn't into sharing. "You don't need to know anything about me."

Her other brow joined the first in a look that said he'd offended her. "You don't have a lot of people skills, do you?"

If she only knew the truth....

"Don't want them."

Kateri frowned as the image of Ren being mocked went through her head. That would explain his hostility toward people. And who could blame him?

But this couldn't be the same man. She knew better. Those images had come from her dreams. Some weird holdover maybe from her dig last summer. Her grandmother had firmly believed that objects could carry the essence of previous owners. That the human spirit was so powerful, it could leave impressions on virtually anything. Kateri had handled a lot of different Mayan fragments. Any one of them could have "infected" her and caused her subconscious to create fictional scenarios.

While it wasn't the most satisfactory of answers, it was certainly a lot better than believing he was some reincarnated warrior or immortal vampire or something else bizarre and farfetched.

Which led her back to the oddest question of all. "How did you get me out of that hole?"

"Carried you."

Nice sarcasm there, buddy. Never had she held a stronger desire to kick anyone. Not even the little boy who'd stolen her purse in kindergarten to aggravate her. But this man ... he was purposefully being vague and difficult.

Unlike the little boy in her class, this one ought to know better....

"You're really going to play this game with me?"

His gaze dropped to her lips. For the merest nanosecond, she saw the spark of desire in his eyes. But no sooner did it flame than he extinguished it. "You asked and I answered. No games."

"What? You don't play those either?"

He wore the most emotionless expression she'd ever seen in her life. Man, he should have played the Terminator. He'd have been better than even Schwarzenegger. "No. I do not."

"You should. There's a lot to be learned from games. As Socrates said, a person can discover more about another in one hour of play than in two years of conversation."

He seemed to consider that until his phone rang an instant later.

Ren pulled it out of his pocket and checked the ID, expecting it to be one of his few friends. His heart stopped.

Not a friend, after all.

It was Coyote.

Don't answer it. Nothing good could come of talking to his brother. Nothing.

But his curiosity was too great. He wasn't even sure how his brother had his number, never mind why the bastard would be calling him. Before he could stop himself, he flipped it open. "Osiyo."

"Greetings indeed, big brother. It has come to my attention that you have yet again stolen the very thing I need. I want it back."

Ren tsked at him. "Poor Anukuwaya. You never could hold on to a woman, could you?"

As Ren had intended, Coyote sputtered in indignation. Then he broke off into a round of cursing him.

In spite of the gravity, Ren was amused by his brother's colorful choices. "That is your father, too, Anukuwaya. More so, actually, since he was never interested in claiming me."

Coyote snarled in his ear. "I want her. Now."

Yeah, and people in hell want ice water. "Will not happen."

"Not even for Choo Co La Tah's life?"

Ren froze at the unexpected question. No ... surely Choo wouldn't have been captured. "You lie."

He heard something that sounded like a fist striking flesh. It was followed by a deep grunt. "Say hi, dog."

A deep English-accented voice spoke over the phone. "There is nothing more frightening, Renegade, than ignorance in action." Choo was one of the few who knew what Ren was short for. His way of letting Ren know Coyote really had him.

Not that he had to doubt. An instant later, a photo text message buzzed, showing him Choo tied down to a chair and beaten brutally.

"His future is up to you, Makah'Alay."

Ren gripped the phone as fury tore through him. The man he'd learned to become wanted to save his old friend. But the warrior in him knew better.

When the coyote was hungry, it fed. There was no appeasing the beast until it'd eaten its fill. No matter what he did, it wouldn't change Coyote's actions or Choo's fate.

"Does Choo Co La Tah live or die?" his brother taunted.

Ren ground his teeth before he spoke the only answer he could give. "That decision is yours alone to make. The Ixkib stays with me."

Coyote laughed before he mocked him. "You were ever st-st-st-stupid."

The line went dead.

Ren could have definitely done without that last bit. His gut knotting over what he was sure he'd just condemned his friend to, he closed his phone and met the woman's gaze. His only comfort came in knowing that his other friend, Sundown, was safely hidden from Coyote along with Sundown's wife, Abigail. Ren and Choo Co La Tah had sent them off months ago so that Coyote wouldn't find them. Not because Sundown and Abby were cowards, but because Abigail was pregnant. None of them were willing to risk the baby to Coyote or any other danger.

Until their child was born, Ren would not go near them or ask for their help.

"What happened?" the Ixkib asked.

Right as he started to answer, something slammed into the roof of the house so hard, it sounded like it might have come through the tiles.

Ren rushed to the door to find Rain running up the hallway.

"Man, there's something wicked outside. Like a tornado or ... I don't know. I didn't go to meteorology school."

Ren grabbed him by the shirt and hauled him into the room. "Guard her."

Kateri scowled as Ren left them alone. "What was that action?"

"I don't know. The man scares me."

She scoffed at Rain's words. "That's not saying much, cuz. As I recall, spiders render you catatonic and even ladybugs make you scream like a girl."

Rain stiffened indignantly. "Not my fault. I promise you. If you ever saw my dad dressed like a Killer Ladybug with my uncle, Seamus, for Mardi Gras, you'd be terrified of them, too. Just saying. Ain't nothing more scarring to a young mind than two straight men in drag, singing 'It's Raining Men' to me, and then telling me I was named after that song. And if that wasn't damaging enough, my mom agreed with them. It wasn't until I was old enough to realize my birth predated the song that I finally calmed down."

An image of Uncle Daniel, who was a scary man in his own right, in a dress and bad makeup went through her mind and made her laugh. Yeah, she could easily picture him torturing his son that way, and so would her aunt Starla. They were hilarious people. "I've never met your uncle Seamus."

"Be glad. Seamus is like a head injury. Funny as hell so long as it's happening to someone else.... Imagine Dad, taller, meaner, thicker, and wielding an Irish brogue."

Yeah, that was something that would probably motivate her to gouge out her eyes. "Okay, no more jokes about ladybugs making you their bitch."

"Thank you."

The lights flickered.

Kateri froze for a minute as she heard things breaking. She looked back at Rain. "What did you see, exactly?"

"Honestly? I think it was a vortex. It looked like something out of Doctor Who."

Glass shattered from the direction of the living room. Even though she'd seen enough horror movies to know better, Kateri went to investigate.

Rain crept along behind her. "I don't think we should leave the room."

She ignored him as she moved cautiously down the hallway, closer to the sounds of fighting. As she came even to the living room, her head spun. Once again, she saw Ren in a different time and place. In her mind, he was fighting in a deep valley with his peculiar war club. His chest bare, every vein stood out while he fought against an older man.

Blood covered both of them. It soaked Ren's hair and stained the white feathers that were attached by leather cords.

"You don't really hate me, Makah'Alay. You know this." The older man's voice was thick with fatigue. "And if you don't change direction, you're going to wind up where you're headed."

"I am sick of your pithy sayings, old man. Do us both a favor and die already."

The old man ducked his swing and kicked him back. "They say that your love has blinded you and that your greed is insatiable. But you're not greedy. Not for material things. I know that and so do you."

"Shut up!" Ren bellowed.

"The truth bites hardest through the deepest treachery. You are nothing but a tool being used, Makah'Alay. As you were with your father and your brother. Are you telling me that that is all you ever aspire to?"

She saw the agony in Ren's dark eyes as those words stung him.

"If Windseer loved you, she would be here now. But she isn't, is she? No. She opened the door for the Grizzly Spirit and then he freed her. Like everyone else, she has abandoned you to die alone."

"So what?" Ren challenged as he swung his club at the man's head. "I entered this world alone, and alone I shall leave it."

He dodged the blow. "And the time in between? You are content to have nothing throughout your life? No one? Ever?" Those words were punctuated by blasts of fire that Ren tried to deflect with his club. They caused him to stagger back and drove him to the ground.

Pain echoed in the older man's eyes as he moved to stand over Ren. "Who will weep for you when you're gone? Tell me, boy. What do you live for?"

Ren blasted him in turn. "Revenge!"

The old man paused so that Ren could regain his feet. "You are right to be hurt, Makah'Alay. But your actions have turned a little right into a great wrong. And your vengeance has spilled over to the innocent who have never caused you harm. Would you have the seed you have planted take root in the heart of another boy? What crops do you sow with such vim? Do you really want them to grow uncultivated? For those boys, those orphans, to have the same venom in their veins as you?"

"What do I care? This world has never shown me kindness. They have never once welcomed me."

The old man dropped his club. "But you do care. Don't you? I see it in your eyes. Even now. Even after all you've been through. You still want what all men do. Comfort-"

Ren bellowed so loud, he drowned out whatever else the old man said. "I want nothing! Nothing!" He renewed his fight with such vigor and rage that his blows came too fast to be seen by a human eye. Only the thunderous sounds of them could be heard.

Just like what was going on in the living room.

In that heartbeat, Kateri pulled out of the past or her dream or whatever it was she saw and found herself back in Ren's house in Las Vegas. Thunder and lightning echoed as Rain pulled her back into the hallway.

In the living room in front of them, Ren was surrounded by dark spirits that attacked as one and then split apart to fight separately. Even so, he held his ground with an admirable skill.

The wolf is never tamed through violence. But rather with a kind, gentle, and above all, patient hand. The most ferocious of beasts see enemies everywhere. They have to in order to live. All they know is how to be attacked and how to fight. They expect treachery from all. Her grandmother's voice whispered through her head.

One of the beasts caught Ren a blow that sent him to his knees. He rolled with it, but didn't make it completely free. Another one caught him and kicked him hard.

They were about to defeat him.

Refusing to watch him go down while he fought to protect her, Kateri ran forward....

Then realized she had no weapon to fight them with.

Oh snap ...

Ren glanced up as another shadow approached him. He drew back to strike the beast, only to see the woman there.

For a full heartbeat, her unexpected presence paralyzed him. He couldn't move as he waited for her to attack him, too.

Instead, she went after those he was fighting....

It was so unexpected that it took several seconds before his brain could reconcile the incongruity of someone fighting for him.

Until it dawned on him that she wasn't a match for them.

His only thought to save her, he ran at her and wrapped himself around her body, then teleported them out of his house and into the only other haven he knew.

Kateri couldn't breathe through the tight hold Ren had on her. Completely surrounded by a wall of muscle, she had her face pressed against his chest. His heart pounded under her cheek while the warm, masculine scent of his skin soothed her. There was an underlying spicy smell. Something that made her mouth water.

After a few seconds, he loosened his arms and took a half step back so that he could look down at her.

The concern in those dark eyes caught her off guard. It was such a hot, sexy look. One that set her on fire. Especially when he cupped her face in his hands and leaned down so that their heads were level.

"Are you all right?"

She nodded. "You?"

"I'll live."

To her chagrin, he released her and stepped away. The sudden absence of his warmth sent a chill over her. And as she glanced around the room, she sucked her breath in sharply.

It was a nice hotel suite. The kind of penthouse suite that a billionaire playboy would rent.

What the ...

"I am having one wicked dream," she breathed, wondering what was going on with her unconscious mind.

Ren shook his head. "It's not a dream."

She snorted. "Then how did we get here?"

"I have the ability to teleport."

Sure he did. She laughed nervously. "Yeah. Beam me up, Scotty, right? Did you guys slip me something? Is Rain in on this?"

"You don't really believe that."

Kateri ran her hand along the dark blue curtain beside her. A curtain that didn't vaporize and turn all of this into some psychotic dream. "No, but I want to." She wanted to believe anything other than what this appeared to be.

I'm insane. I have to be-that at least makes sense.

Otherwise ...

She flinched at a reality she wanted no part of. Personally, she liked having an address in the state of Denial. "This is real, isn't it?"

"As real as it gets."

Covering her face with her hands, she tried everything she could to come up with some other plausible explanation.

There wasn't one. When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.... Damn you, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Damn you!

And in that moment, everything overwhelmed her. The death of Fernando, her recent spree of brushes with death, her crazy, weird dreams ... Everything.

Oh God, it's true.

All of it.

No, he can't be the same man in the past. He couldn't be. He couldn't ...

Ren recognized the shock she was falling into. Knowing he had to ground her, he closed the distance between them and cupped her face again in his palms. The softness of her skin caressed his and made him yearn for things he knew he could never have. Things he knew he shouldn't even want.

"What's your name?" She'd called herself "Teri" earlier, but it didn't seem to fit what he knew of her.

Kateri blinked at his unexpected question. "Huh? What?"

"I don't know your name, little one. What do they call you?"

That made her laugh. "Of course you don't. Why should you? You've only saved my life twice now. Pulled me out of..." Her brain went from her situation to another one that scared her even move. Is Rain okay?"

"They won't hurt him. They're after you."

Of course they were....

"What are they?"

Ren hesitated. Being told that basically everything wanted a piece of you wasn't conducive to calming someone down. While he didn't have a lot of people skills, he knew that one bit of knowledge was best kept to himself. "Enemies."

She screwed her face up at him. "Really?" she asked, her voice dripping in sarcasm. "Enemies? That's the best you can do?"

"You still haven't told me your name," he reminded her.

"Kateri Avani, though most people call me Teri."

Ren repeated it in his head. It was a beautiful name, like the woman who bore it. "I'm Ren."

"I know."

"But I didn't tell it to you."

She frowned at him. "Does that make a difference?"

"Where I come from, it does."

Kateri bit back another retort as she stared into eyes so black, she couldn't even make out his pupil.

From the deepest part of her brain, she remembered something her grandmother had once told her about the way her people viewed names. Why "Waleli" was only known to the two of them and no one else. "It's a sign of trust."

He nodded. "When someone knows your name, you give them a small piece of yourself. It's the first step toward friendship."

And in that moment, she had another insight into why he so seldom spoke. That, too, was giving her a part of himself. If he really was the man in the past, then he was trusting her not to mock him should he stutter. "So we're past that whole two-syllable thing, then?"

One corner of his mouth quirked up into the most devastating smile she'd ever seen on a man. "We are..." and then as if realizing he was about to give her only two syllables as an answer, he tacked on, "Kateri."

Dang ... the way he said that with his accent ... It sent shivers over her. She'd never particularly liked her name. While it was uncommon, it came with the annoying drawback that no one ever could spell or pronounce it.

But her name rolled off his tongue like a caress.

Against her will, she felt a part of her melt toward him. He really was sweet when he wasn't being a total ass.

And that made her wonder if his lips would taste as good as they looked....

Teri! She never had thoughts like that. She was too focused on her career to bother with something so trivial. But for once, she couldn't seem to quell her desire.

She really, really wanted to bury her face into the crook of his neck and inhale his warm, masculine scent.

Licking her lips, she leaned in to him. She was almost home free when they heard a sound at the door. At first, she thought it was a mistake.

Until the lock turned.

A moment later, the door was blasted open, spraying debris all over them. Ren shielded her body with his. Violent winds tore through the room. They were so strong that it stole her breath and whipped her hair around her body. If not for Ren holding her, she'd have been sucked out of the room. How he continued to stand strong against the ferocity of a hurricane, she had no idea.

And as the winds picked up speed, she met Ren's gaze. Her heart stopped.

His black eyes had turned blood-red.