Cassie’s hands gripped Trik’s shirt as she fought to keep from collapsing under his declaration. He loved her. She could feel it flowing off of him, feel it in his touch, his stare, his soul.
Trik saw the memories, the hurt, and the pain in Cassie’s mind as he held her face and shame crashed into him again. How could he have made her feel so worthless, so unwanted, his beloved? He didn’t deserve her, but he wouldn’t give her up. She would be lucky if he ever let her out of his sight.
Trik buried his face in her neck as words of love in his native tongue poured from him. He wanted to kiss her, to have her feel everything inside him but he would not share their intimacy with anyone. He stood and placed her on her feet. He looked down at her and smiled gently.
“Can you stand?” He asked.
Cassie nodded her head and Trik saw a glimpse of shame in her but she shut it off from him. He frowned at her. He didn’t want any secrets between them.
“Later, Trik. Let’s just get out of here and we can deal with everything else,” Cassie told him but she took his hand and squeezed it, reassuring him that she was with him; she wasn’t going anywhere.
Trik walked over to where Andaer was still being held to the wall. His eyes narrowed at the elf.
“You will apologize to your Queen,” he told him.
Andaer looked at Trik and then at Cassie. She started to duck her head but Trik reached out and gently raised her chin.
“You bow to no one; you hide from no one. You are my Queen, my beloved, and you will hold your head high.” Cassie felt his words give her strength, but still she felt the shame of what she’d done. She knew she was still addicted to Rapture, even now as she stood there she was beginning to shake with withdrawals. She knew that she couldn’t think about it just then; she had to get out of there. She pulled her shoulders back and remembered who she had been before. She had been confident and not with the help of a drug. She met Andaer’s stare and waited.
“I apologize, my lady. I only wanted to care for you.” Andaer was sincere. Though he had still been seeking to fulfill his own desires, she had never felt threatened by him.
Trik was satisfied with the apology but that did not mean he had granted the elf mercy. He began to squeeze Andaer’s throat with his will and knew that it would only take a little more pressure to crush his windpipe, but her voice stopped him.
“Trik, no.” Cassie stepped up beside him and placed a hand on his arm. She looked up at him and shook her head. “Don’t do this. He didn’t hurt me.”
Trik growled. “Do you think what he had planned wouldn’t have hurt? Do you think you would have enjoyed his touch, his kiss?”
She recoiled as if he had slapped her. “Of course not. I couldn’t enjoy anything, I was dead inside!”
Trik stepped towards her and he softened his voice. “Cassie it would have been rape. You weren’t consensual. You weren’t yourself. You were…”
“High as a kite,” Cassie finished for him and her voice dripped with disgust at herself.
“It wasn’t your fault, Cassie. But he knew what he was doing.”
“Don’t kill him. You are not a murderer any longer. Please.” Though her words pleaded for Andaer, her voice was emotionless.
Trik turned back to Andaer and with a snarl freed the man. He dropped to the floor gasping for air and rubbing his throat.
“Thank you, my King, for mercy.”
“Do not thank me just yet. I won’t kill you today but you will spend the rest of your miserable life looking over your shoulder. You will lie in bed at night and hear whispers on the wind and you will shake in fear wondering if your time has come. You will always wonder if that day is your last because I am coming for you. I grant no mercy for one who would take advantage of the helpless, and I sure as hell won’t grant mercy to one who dares to touch my Chosen.”
Trik stepped back, giving Andaer room and gestured towards the reflective walls that were in every room. “Leave now before I forget what Cassie has requested and give in to my desire to cut your fingers off one at a time.”
Andaer blanched and was up and through the wall in the span of a heartbeat.
Cassie was beginning to shake and her palms were sweating. She gritted her teeth against the withdrawals from Rapture and refused to beg Trik to get her some. She couldn’t stand the thought of seeing him look at her in revulsion if he saw the desperation in her eyes and the pleading in her voice when she needed more. Cassie thought of the life that she had been living less than a month ago and she snorted in disgust at what she had become. Cassie Tate, wall flower, rule follower, innocent to the ways of the world, was a drug addict. How’s that for irony?
“Cassie.” Trik was watching her and when he reached for her she pulled back. She didn’t want him to see what was warring inside her, how she couldn’t stand the feel of her own skin.
“Are you afraid of my touch?” Trik took another step towards her and she took a step back, a dance of love and fear, doubt and shame. “You know I would never hurt you, don’t you?”
“Yes,” she answered honestly.
“Then why do you pull away from me?”
Cassie looked up into his face, his amazing, perfect, beautiful face. He was searching her own face for truth, for a sign something to tell him that she was still his. She wanted to run to him, she wanted to let him be the hero and let him carry her, if only for a little while. But instead of telling him that, she lied through her teeth.