“Isn’t she?”
Michael looked at Maddie, who was sitting in her high chair next to him. Maddie dimpled flirtatiously at her father with blissful unconcern for the applesauce dripping from her face. She slammed both hands in the gooey mess in front of her.
“More!” she demanded and leaned forward, opening her mouth wide.
Lyn watched as Michael held the spoon high, made “clack, clack, clack” helicopter sounds, circled it around her head, and zoomed it toward her mouth. At the very last instant Maddie snapped her mouth shut and shook with silent hilarity as Michael tried to wedge the spoon in between her pursed lips.
Maddie might have inherited her father’s black curly hair and dimples, but her sense of humor was pure, unadulterated Kettle.
“She hasn’t had one mouthful,” said Lyn.
“She’ll eat if she’s hungry.” Michael put down the spoon and picked up his coffee mug. “Kara used to do the same thing. She never starved.”
Lyn privately suspected that Maddie was much smarter than Kara would have been at the same age. “Oh, she’s just average,” she told the other mothers at play group, without believing a word of it. She felt sorry for them, Maddie’s superiority was so embarrassingly obvious. “Maddie is perfectly capable of not eating when she’s hungry. She thinks it’s funny.”
“Ah, mothers, you’re all the same!” said Michael comfortably. “Georgina used to get herself in a state with Kara. It’s obviously innate, this desire to see your children eat.”
Lyn squeezed the bridge of her nose hard between her thumb and forefinger. She didn’t want to be in any category that also included Georgina.
Michael pointed his piece of toast at her and spoke with his mouth full. “Your sisters do exactly the same thing with their noses when they’re annoyed. I noticed Cat doing it Friday night. Had a little laugh to myself.”
Lyn let go of her nose. “Did you now.” She stood up and shoved hard at his shoulder. “Swap places please. I’m going to indulge my strange desire not to see my child starve.”
Michael circled one arm around her waist and pulled her down onto his lap. Lyn picked up the spoon and the jar of baby food and sized up her daughter. “Do you want your breakfast?” she asked. Maddie opened her mouth to say “no” and Lyn shoved in a laden spoon. Maddie swallowed, licked her lips, and opened her mouth to bellow at these deceitful tactics. With unerring accuracy, Lyn jammed in another mouthful.
“Your mother has incredible reflexes,” said Michael admiringly. Maddie didn’t look impressed.
“Better than bloody Georgina, I bet,” said Lyn as she wiped Maddie’s glowering face with her bib. “Oh much better than Georgina!” Michael jiggled her up and down on his lap suggestively. “In every respect.”
“What’s better than Georgina in every respect?” Kara came into the dining room, pulled out a chair so that it screeched horrendously across the floorboards, and sat down at the table in front of them. She picked up a box of cereal and looked at it with disgust. Michael and Lyn froze.
“Kara!” crowed Maddie and clapped her hands, showering her parents with applesauce.
“Lyn, I bet,” said Kara. She put on a prissy voice. “Your lovely Lynnie is so much better than Mum, isn’t she?”
Michael cleared his throat. “Good morning, sweetheart!” he said hopefully, while Lyn extricated herself from his arms. “I made scrambled eggs,” she said to Kara. “Want some?”
Kara made retching noises.
“Don’t do that please, Kara,” said Michael.
“What? Scrambled eggs make me sick. So what?”
“You’re being rude and you know it.”
Lyn said mildly, “You liked scrambled eggs yesterday.”
Kara ignored her. She was looking mutinously at her father. “Oh. And it’s really polite comparing Lyn to my mother in front of me, isn’t it? How do you think that makes me feel?”
“Sweetheart, I was not comparing Lyn to your mum. I was just being silly.”
“Yeah, whatever, Dad. I’m not retarded.”
“No, darling, you’re not. You’re very intelligent. Speaking of which, I’ve been keeping my eyes peeled for a good laptop for you—”
“Oh! Now you’ve made me feel sick! I can’t stand it here!” Kara threw down the box of cereal so that Sultana Bran went flying and stormed out of the room.
Michael raised baffled hands at Lyn.
“Eyes peeled,” she explained. “You shouldn’t have said you were keeping your eyes peeled.”
“My God,” Michael shook his head slowly back and forth.
“What do you think of that, Maddie?”
Maddie looked at him in solemn agreement.
“My Dod.” She frowned heavily and shook her head vigorously back and forth. “My Dod.”
TO DO
WORK
Sign off New Year promotions.
XMAS Day staff roster
Staff bonuses
Ring back M.
Accounts!!!
FAMILY
Book M.’s swimming lesson.
XMAS gifts still to buy: Mum, C., K.
Menu for XMAS Day
Appointment for K. with Dr. Lewis
Talk to C. re D.
FRIENDS
Call Yvonne for birthday.
E-mail Susan.
MISCELLANEOUS
Query gas bill—why so high?
“Cat. It’s me. Please don’t hang—”
The phone clicked and beeped ponderously in her ear.
Oh, for God’s sake, thought Lyn, as she replaced the phone. Each time Cat hung up on her, it felt like a stinging slap across her face. It was so childish! So unproductive!
She doodled an asterisk next to Talk to C. re D.
Fine then, she would move on to another priority. She looked at her list, sighed, checked her watch, and considered her half-full coffee cup. It was still hot. She couldn’t even pretend she felt like another one.
Get a grip, she told herself. It wasn’t like her to procrastinate like this. Come on, remember the third habit: First things first.
When Lyn was in her final year at university, she had a profound, almost religious experience: She read The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.
Every page brought a new epiphany. Yes! she kept thinking, as she highlighted another paragraph in fluorescent yellow and felt herself expanding with potential. It was such a relief to discover that she wasn’t at the mercy of her unfortunate Kettle genes or her overly dramatic Kettle childhood. Unlike animals, she learned, human beings could choose how they responded to stimuli. She could change her programming, with a simple paradigm shift. She didn’t have to be a Kettle girl! She could be whoever she wanted to be!