“He bought me from my mom for who knows what reason, because she sent him to prison. Maybe even before if that’s why he was paying her for two years before he was even arrested.”
Maddoc shakes his head. “I don’t know. His going to jail never made sense, my going to jail made no fucking sense if you think about it from our perspective. We’re Brayshaws, that doesn’t happen to us, so I knew he had some sort of plan behind it. And the one he had shocked the shit out of us. We thought maybe because he was arrested in another town that it made a difference, and that’s why he wasn’t released right away – them not knowing who he was – but learned later it wouldn’t.
“Raven, we’re not the only family like ours, there’s several of us spanning across the state line like a barrier, blocking people from coming into our worlds. We all serve a purpose, live a certain way to have the lives we do,” Maddoc says, then glances to his brothers before looking back to me. “But we will fucking find out where you fit into this. Your area is outside of our maps. I don’t even know how he found you or your mom. None of the families connected to us have business that way.”
I rub at my eyes and let out a deep breath.
The last two days have been a huge fucking information overload. My head is starting to spin.
I meet each of their stares, each a complete contrast of the last – dark brown, light blue, and jade green – but each hold the same intensity and promise.
One I chose to believe, even if it makes me a sucker in the end.
Family runs deeper than blood, and I think I might have found mine.
We all stand, and Royce and Captain both move in for a hug before disappearing inside to crash.
Maddoc grips my hand and pulls me behind him, not bothering to close the balcony doors on our way to our designated room for the night. Our door, though, he closes and locks.
Grabbing a hold of my other hand, he pries my knife from my fist, pulling it closer to his face. A frown finds him as he stares, slowly running his fingers across the words that mean more to him than I probably even understand. He nods to himself, then sets it on the table beside us.
Maddoc’s eyes shift to mine. He tugs his hoodie over his head, drops his jeans, and then moves to relieve me of mine, not once looking away from me.
He steps against me, wrapping his arm around my lower back and pulling me in.
I halfway hate how I like it when he does this, touches me, stares at me with dark eyes full of more than I might ever be ready for.
He tips my head back with a touch to my chin and runs his lips across mine, nipping lightly, before he pulls back. “Don’t think too hard on all this, baby. Just let it play out, and while it does, know something,” he whispers, walking me backward to the mattress. I allow myself to fall and he drops down, hovering over me. “I don’t care what happens tonight, tomorrow, or next fucking year. I don’t care what anyone wants from, or of me. I decide what I want from you.”
He wedges his knee between mine, bringing himself even closer as he runs his lips across my jawline, stopping to whisper in my ear, “And I’m bettin’ on everything.”
I turn off the shower and step out, quickly dressing and towel drying my hair.
Last night was the best night’s sleep I’d had in weeks and it has everything to do with the one who slept beside me, while my knife sat on the table beside him.
My knife that was given to me by his father.
What a crazy few fucking days.
I quietly step into the living room area of the suite, and as expected, it was Captain’s footsteps out on the balcony that woke me.
He stands there looking over the foggy city a moment before running his hands down his face. He grips the railing, dropping his chin to his chest, and the sight has a pain hitting mine.
I knew he’d be the first up, if he ever even closed his eyes.
My footsteps give me away and he glances over, a wretched smile on his lips.
I pull my sleeves over my hands and blow into my palms, moving to stand beside him. We both stare out at the early morning city below.
“How many times have you asked yourself if he really did it?” My question comes after a few quiet minutes. I don’t have to say what it is, he knows what I’m referring to just like I know what’s on his mind.
He has a baby girl to love and protect, even if that means protecting her from his own father.
“Too many to count.” He looks my way. “And every time I do, I feel guilty for it.”
“And then you feel angry, followed by ...”
He frowns, but admits quietly, “Unworthy. Of her.”
I clear my throat, wanting to look away, completely overtaken by the torment in his eyes, but I don’t dare. If this shit’s hard for me, must be ten times harder for him.
“Captain,” I call his name, even though he’s already focused solely on me. “Your dad, the man who saved you, who loved your biological father as a brother, like you do yours...” I trail off and his hand shoots out to grip mine on the railing, the corner of his eyes tightening. “He did not rape my mother. He is not a rapist.”
His grip on my fingers tightens, and he starts to shake a little, so I step closer.
“Rolland was good to me, too,” I whisper. “The only one that ever was, to be honest. He was the first person I ever felt any kindness from, I remember that clearly. The knife? He gave it to me because he said he wanted me to be able to protect myself. I was just some kid he didn’t know and had no tie to, and he wanted me to be safe.” He tries to fight it off, but he can’t, and his frown grows a little glossy.
“If he wanted that for me, some random kid in a beat-up trailer, imagine what he would do to protect his own grandbaby, pac man?” I whisper. “I’d bet he’d die for her.”
He pulls his lips between his teeth, nodding as he takes his eyes from mine. A deep, ragged breath leaves him, and his head falls back, a heavy chuckle escaping him. In the next second, he yanks me against him, hugging me tight.
I let him hold on until he’s ready to let go, but even when he does he only pulls back a bit.
“Raven—”
“Don’t,” I cut him off. “Don’t thank me. You deserve to know all that. He’s your dad, Cap, and that’s your daughter.”
He sighs. “My mind, it’s been fucking with me lately. I knew something was coming, I get that nagging in my gut right before it does, every damn time. I didn’t know what I’d have to do. I love my brothers, and I love my father, but if he was guilty of what they said, I ...” He trails off taking a deep breath. “Zoey is everything to me, Raven. I’d—”
“Stop. You don’t have to say it.”
He nods. “I know they’d stand with me, whatever I needed, they’d do it beside me without question, it’s who they are, who we are as a unit, but I’d hate to of had to be the reason they lost our dad a second time.”
“Yeah, well,” I try and make light of things. “My mom sent your dad to prison for eleven years, Cap, and look where I’m standing right now.”
The corner of his lips tip up, some light coming back in his blue-green eyes. “Yeah, pretty sure it could have been you yourself who did, and you’d still be standing here.”