The Accidental Vampire

"I'm sure they didn't steal your car, Teddy. Elvi said they weren't going to do anything illegal."

Victor exchanged a glance with DJ as Karen Knight tried to soothe the outraged police captain. Teddy Brunswick hadn't taken it at all well when-after DJ had returned from checking on Mabel to announce that the women were gone-they'd all rushed out to the driveway to find his patrol car missing. He'd cursed a blue streak as they'd piled into Victor and Harper's cars and raced to the park where the fair was being held.

Karen had the unfortunate luck of returning to her car in the parking lot for another box of pies as they pulled in. Spotting her, Teddy had leapt out of Victor's car and charged over, practically foaming at the mouth.

"They were just going to come to the fair," Karen went on. "The plan was they were going to sneak out through Elvi's sunroom and ride over in my car, but there wasn't enough room, with all the pies in it. I wasn't sure what to do, but they said to go ahead, they'd find another way to get here."

"And then they stole my car," Teddy Brunswick said furiously.

"I'm sure they didn't. Elvi said they wouldn't do anything illegal," Karen repeated anxiously.

"Well, then she lied," Teddy snapped.

"That's kind of harsh, Teddy," Mike said with a frown, slipping a supportive arm around his wife. "Elvi and Mabel aren't the sort to lie and steal. They probably just borrowed it. They would have brought it back after the fair."

Seeing that Brunswick was winding up for another rant, Victor interceded. "Where are they now, Karen? I presume they got here, all right? The patrol car is here."

"Oh, yes, of course." She smiled at him with relief, apparently grateful to turn away from Teddy. "They're manning the booth."

"What booth?" DJ asked fretfully. "Mabel shouldn't be out of bed."

"Mabel was supposed to man the pie booth, but there was so much demand at Elvi's booth, she ended up helping her over there and I took over the pie booth," Karen explained. "They're really racking it up too, I can tell you."

"What and where is Elvi's booth?" Victor asked patiently.

"It's the Biting Booth, only it isn't the-" Karen broke off as Victor turned and headed off into the park, the other men hard on his heels.

"I can't believe she's still biting when she knows it's against our laws," Harper said with dismay as they hurried through the crowd in search of the Biting Booth. "And Mabel too. Surely you told her it's not allowed, DJ?"

"Yes," DJ bit off the word.

"The Biting Booth is usually in the back right corner," Brunswick announced, hurrying to keep up with them.

"Show us," Victor said, and allowed him to take the lead as they made their way through the crowded grounds.

Victor was concentrating on keeping Brunswick in his sights in the busy area, so wasn't looking around much, but when Edward suddenly gave a bark of laughter, he glanced around curiously.

"What-?" Victor broke off the question as he spotted the booth Edward was looking at. The booth itself and its occupants were impossible to see for the crowd gathered in front of it, but the sign was clearly visible overhead. It did read Biting Booth, but the Biting had a black line through it and Kissing had been written above it.

"Well," Edward said mildly, "I suppose we can at least stop worrying about the ladies losing their heads over this."

"The hell we can," Victor muttered and strode past Brunswick to make his way through the crowd. He pushed his way to the front of the crowd of men, ignoring the complaints and mutters it caused, but came to an abrupt halt as he arrived at the booth.

Mabel was at the counter, checking off items on a clipboard as she asked questions of the man at the front of the line. He heard DJ's sigh of relief as he reached his side and spotted his lifemate with her clipboard, but Victor didn't comment as his eyes sought out and found Elvi.

She was at the back of the booth, busy removing a needle from the arm of a leering young man. As they watched, she gave him a cookie, a small glass of juice, then a quick peck on the lips, before moving to the man seated in the next of three chairs.

Growling, Victor started around to the entrance to the booth, only to find Mabel suddenly in his way.

"Sorry, Victor, you don't qualify," she said brightly. "We can't take your blood. No blood, no kiss. Off you go now. We're busy here."

"Mabel." DJ caught her arm and drew her to the side to begin whispering frantically. He wasn't as angry as Victor now that he saw Mabel wasn't actually kissing anyone, but Victor was furious.

"There you go," Elvi was saying cheerfully as she removed the needle on the second man and put a wad of cotton over the hole where the needle had been. "Just hold that firmly for a minute while I get you a Band-Aid."

She turned then, only to come to a halt to keep from crashing into Victor.

"Oh!" she said with alarmed surprise. "Victor. What are you doing here?"

"I think the more important question would be what are you doing here?" he said grimly, and then took her arm to move her away from the three men seated in the chairs at the back of the booth.

"I'm working," she answered shortly, then glanced nervously around. "Teddy isn't here, is he? Does he know-?"

"That you stole his car?" he finished dryly. "Yes, he does and he's pretty angry."

"We didn't steal it," Elvi said quickly. "We just borrowed it."

"I don't think he sees it that way," Victor muttered. "He's not happy, and neither am I."

"Well, that hardly matters, since you weren't happy with me before," she said impatiently. "From what you were shouting, it's obvious you think I'm a brainless twit."

"I do not," Victor denied at once, cursing himself for yelling at her earlier. In the next moment he was frowning in confusion, wondering how he'd suddenly become the one in the wrong. Before he could sort it out, Brunswick came rushing up with the others.

"Ellen Stone," he said, yanking out his handcuffs. "You're under arrest for grand theft auto."

"Why is it you only call me by my proper name when you're angry at me?" Elvi asked smartly, not seeming too concerned by the handcuffs he was waving angrily around. "And put those silly things away. You can't arrest me."

"I can and I'm going to," Teddy assured her.

"Then you'll just have to charge yourself with conspiracy to kidnap," she said calmly. When Teddy drew himself up in shock, she went on, "Oh, don't try to deny it. We heard everything from the upstairs landing on the way to my room." Making a stern face, she imitated him in a deep growl, '"We'll just tell them they can't go to the fair, and if they give us any trouble we'll lock them in the cold room.'" She arched one eyebrow and said, "If it isn't kidnapping, it's at least unlawful confinement."

"But we didn't get the chance to lock you in," he argued quickly.

"And I didn't steal your car, I borrowed it. Here are your keys." She dug a set of keys out of her pocket and dropped them into his hand. "Thanks for leaving them in the car for me. It's in the parking lot."

"You left the keys in the ignition?" Victor asked with disbelief.

"The shed was on fire," Teddy muttered, with embarrassment. "I don't even remember turning off the engine. I just slammed the car into park and jumped out to run over." He grimaced. "I didn't even think of them again until the car was missing."

"That ought to look good in the report," Mabel commented, drawing their attention to her and DJ. The couple stood arm in arm. Victor supposed that meant they'd patched things up. It was what he really wanted to do with Elvi, patch things up and get her back to the house where she would be safe. And yelling at her obviously wasn't going to achieve that, he acknowledged. He supposed he'd best try reason.

"Elvi," he began calmly, "DJ can help Mabel with the booth. Please come home with me."

It almost seemed to work. Her stance and expression softened, but then she shook her head and said apologetically, "I can't Victor. I'm expected to be here."

Victor snorted with irritation. "From what I've heard this last week, you're expected at every town event. It won't kill you to leave this one event early."

"Actually, it very well might kill me," she said coldly, her own temper returning. "In case you haven't noticed, it isn't money they're donating here."

"You shouldn't have to sing for your supper like some sort of town pet," Victor said sharply and knew at once that it had been the wrong thing to say. Elvi had started to turn away, but paused and spun back at his words. Curiously, her gaze shot to Edward first and then to him.

"Town pet?" she asked in a very quiet voice.

Victor's mouth tightened, and he pointed out, "That's how it seems to be. They supply you blood and you come when they call like a well-trained dog. They have plays and fairs and displays, and you show up and perform like a trained bear."

Victor saw the blood drain from her face and was sorry he'd said that, but couldn't take back the words. Besides, they were true. He'd caught glimpses of it everywhere in her life. She hated the name Elvi, but didn't demand people stop using it because she didn't want to upset them. She'd admitted that she hated the costumes she wore to the restaurant and these events-like the sleek black gowns she and Mabel both had on now-but wore them because it was expected. The Birthday Bite business was a pain, but she'd continued with it rather than disappoint anyone. And then there was her panic about the pies for the fair, as if should she not participate in this one event it would be cataclysmic. He'd got the impression that she feared they'd stop donating if she didn't make these appearances.

Still, his choice of words could have been more diplomatic, Victor realized as he saw the cool expression now replacing the hurt on her face. He braced himself for a telling off, instead she nodded abruptly and said in icy tones, "It's good to know what you really think of me."

"Elvi," he reached for her hand, but she jerked it away.

"No. You've made your opinion perfectly clear. You may not be able to read me and that might suggest I'm your lifemate, but I don't think I am. You don't think much of me, Victor. You think I'm stupid and in need of a keeper. I don't want to be anyone's pet. Not even yours. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do."

Turning away, she moved back to her charges in the donation chairs, leaving Victor staring helplessly after her, knowing he'd screwed up royally, but unsure how to fix it.

"I can't believe you!" Mabel snapped, suddenly in his face. "You're supposed to be her lifemate, but you call her the town pet and a trained bear?"

"Mabel," DJ murmured, reaching for her arm, but she shook him off with a sharp "no" and glared at Victor. "For your information, this particular fair is all because of you."

"What?" Victor asked with surprise.

"Mabel's right," Teddy announced wearily, most of his anger with Elvi appearing gone. "We arranged this fair to bring in more donors... because of you and the men."

When they began to protest, he raised a hand for silence and explained, "There are five of you here that we're giving blood to for a week. That's five weeks of Elvi's supply gone like that." He snapped his thumb and finger together.

"Actually," Mabel added. "It's probably more than five weeks since you men seem to drink more than she does. We have to replace that blood so she doesn't suffer for your visit."

Teddy nodded. "We realized that when we made the plans for you to come here and arranged the fair to try to build up the blood supply. Though, of course, we didn't tell Elvi that at the time. She just thought it was yet another of the endless Fairs we have each summer. There are so many she loses track. But that was the reasoning behind it... to make sure we had the blood to support this week."

"Yes," Mabel said grimly. "So, perhaps instead of insulting her, you men could be more supportive. It's not like we expect you to sing for your supper. Elvi and I are willing to do it for you. Although," she added grimly, "perhaps you should. Maybe if you had to sing for your supper for a change you'd understand Elvi better and wouldn't be so damned judgmental." Turning on her heel, she stalked off to join Elvi.

"Elvi isn't a pet," Brunswick said quietly, watching the two women work. "She's well loved and cared for in Port Henry. She's one of us. And that's why she comes to these events, not because she's some trained animal expected to perform."

Victor hesitated, knowing that's the way he and everyone else in this town saw it, but they weren't seeing everything. Finally he asked, "Do you really think she wants to attend and volunteer at every single event this town holds?"

"Well, why wouldn't she?" Brunswick asked with surprise. "I do."

"That's your job, Brunswick. To make sure there's no trouble. Her job is the restaurant and bed-and-breakfast, not making an appearance as Elvi the town vampire and running a Biting Booth or whatever else she's done these last five years. When does she get to just sit back and relax and read a book by the fire? Or anything like that?"

Brunswick looked uncertain. "She could say no if she didn't-"

"How could she possibly say no?" Victor asked. "Look, most immortals get their blood from the Argeneau Blood Bank. The donors are completely anonymous. They're faceless, nameless mortals an immortal never has to encounter. It's even delivered like groceries, leaving us to consume it guilt free.

"Elvi, on the other hand, lives and walks among her donors. Almost every mortal in this town has donated to her survival, which is kind and giving and really quite marvelous of you, but it's also guilt-inducing for her. How could she possibly feel she can say 'No, I don't feel like attending this or that' to people she feels she owes her very life to?"

DJ nodded and said, "Her life would have been much easier these last five years if she'd been able to simply order her blood as we do."

"We didn't know she could order blood," Brunswick said defensively, and then added, "And, hell, she's got nothing to feel guilty for. We're the ones who insisted she take that damned trip. We all pressured her into it. If we hadn't, she never would have come back a vampire and wouldn't have needed the blood in the first place. Why the hell do you think everyone gives blood so willingly? Normally, trying to get blood donors is like pulling teeth, but mention Elvi needs more blood and everyone from Dawn down at the grocery store to Jimmy at the garage is lining up to donate because everyone pushed her to take that damned trip. She couldn't go to the corner store that fall without the cashier telling her she should go. So, we feel we owe it to her. And she's one of our own and we take care of our own."

"And I'm sure she's grateful for it," Victor assured him. "I know I am. You kept her alive for me to find. But you need to see that in saving her life, you also took it. Her life is no longer her own. She spends her time running from the restaurant where she's expected to make appearances, to rushing to event after event to pay back for the blood she needs... To the point where now she's putting her life at risk by attending this fair so no one's disappointed. That's wrong, Teddy."

Brunswick frowned unhappily and turned to watch the two women work.

"Damn," DJ muttered, his gaze shifting over the mortal men all crowding around Elvi and Mabel, eager to give blood to please them. "Why don't we just call Bastien and have a year's worth of blood sent down? Then they wouldn't have an excuse to be here."

"We can't call Bastien," Victor said.

"Why?"

Victor turned a grim look on the younger immortal and pointed out, "Bastien reports to Lucian."

"Right," DJ said with defeat.

It appeared the others didn't understand, however. They all looked curious, but it was Harper who asked, "So?"

"The first question out of Bastien's mouth would be 'How is the case going?' " he explained, and then added, "I don't want to answer that question."

"Just what case would that be, and why wouldn't you want to answer the question?" Brunswick asked, reminding them of his presence.

Victor frowned, hesitant to admit his original purpose in coming here, but in the end he didn't have to, Edward did it for him.

"I believe Victor is referring to his job as enforcer for our council."

"His job as enforcer?" Teddy raised his eyebrows, and asked with interest, "Is that like a vampire cop?"

"Basically," Edward agreed. "He is sent out to hunt down rogue immortals."

"Rogue immortals?" Teddy's eyes narrowed. "Like ones who go around biting mortals and such?"

Victor grimaced.

"Yes," Edward answered when he didn't. "Of course, his case was complicated when he got here and found he couldn't read Elvi and she is his lifemate."

"Lifemate, lifemate, lifemate. What the hell is a lifemate?" Teddy asked with irritation. "Everyone keeps throwing that word around. Mabel is DJ's lifemate, Elvi is-or according to her isn't-Victor's lifemate. What the hell does it mean?"

"It is what it sounds like," Victor said simply. "Our other half. The rare woman who would be a proper mate. A woman we can neither read nor control and who balances out our shortcomings."

"She completes us," Harper said quietly. "And fills up the emptiness our existence forces upon us."

Brunswick chewed that over, and then asked, "And Elvi's that for you?"

Victor frowned, his gaze sliding over the other men before he admitted, "It seems she may be that for all of us."

"Yeah, DJ was saying as much the other day," Teddy said with a grimace. "Does this mean that instead of a mate, we've found Elvi a harem?"

"No," Edward assured him. "It does rarely happen where two immortals can't read and would suit one of the opposite sex, but it is very rare, and not the case here. At least," he added, glancing around the men, "I can read her. She is not my lifemate."

"Well, why the hell are you still here, then?" Victor asked with annoyance. "Why didn't you leave the minute you knew you could read her?"

"It was a free week away," Edward said with a shrug. "Besides, I was curious to see how it would turn out. It's like one of those movies-of-the-week. The big tough council enforcer sent to bring in a rogue vampire, only she's not what he thinks she is, and she's his lifemate. What will he do?" He shrugged. "Besides, this town is just... and she's so... and then there are other interests here," he finished with a shrug.

Victor just gaped at the man, unsure how to respond. He then turned a disbelieving glance DJ's way when the younger immortal commented, "Well, at least there's one less man in the running."

"Actually, is two less men," Alessandro announced, drawing their attention his way. He gave a shrug and said, "I too can read bella Elvi."

"You stayed for the free week too?" DJ suggested with amusement.

Alessandro shrugged again. "And other things."

"That leaves you, Harper," Teddy announced pointedly, turning Victor's attention the German's way. "I suppose you can read her too and were just hanging out for the free blood all week and to see what would happen."

"Actually, no," Harper said, and then admitted, "I haven't tried to read her."

Victor frowned. "You haven't?"

"No," Harper said calmly. "I didn't bother to try after finding I couldn't read Jenny Harper."

Teddy Brunswick stiffened. "Jenny Harper, our mail-woman?"

"Yes. The first night at the restaurant I went to thank her party for switching tables with us, if you'll recall?"

When the men all nodded, he said, "Well, the coincidence of her last name being Harper as is my first name, started a conversation and..." He shrugged.

"But you've been courting Elvi," Victor pointed out. "Why-"

"I wasn't exactly courting her, Victor. But I was here at her invitation-or Mabel's as the case may be-and it did seem polite to keep company with her until the week is over. It also seemed a good opportunity to allow Jenny to get used to me before I tell her she's mine," he said simply. "Besides, you did seem to need the help keeping an eye on her with someone out to kill her."

"Which is still the case," Edward pointed out. "Although now there is the added problem of keeping you from losing her. And then keeping the council from demanding her head." He smiled with mild amusement. "For a two-thousand-year-old vampire your lack of finesse in dealing with women is rather appalling."

"What are you going to do about this council?" Brunswick asked before Victor could react to Edward's words.

Victor sighed, his shoulders slumping as he admitted, "I don't know what the hell to do about the council. I've been trying to sort that out all week, but got distracted by... things," he ended lamely. Most of the distraction was due to Elvi herself. Truly, an immortal was useless when he first found his lifemate.

"Well"-Teddy shifted unhappily-"what exactly is it they're sore about?"

"We were sent here originally because of the ad in the paper and the rumors in Toronto," Victor said.

Brunswick scowled at the accusation in his face. "Don't get all pissy with me. If it weren't for the ad, you never would have met her. Besides, they can't punish her for either thing. You already know that the rumors around the clubs are because of me and Barney, and the ad was placed by Mabel. They can't blame her for that."

"Surely, he's right, Victor," Harper said. "They can hardly blame and punish her for something others did."

"No," Victor agreed. "But they can blame her for other things. She isn't exactly living quietly and doing her best to evade notice here. She's a celebrity, if only in this small town, which they won't like at all. And she was biting mortals, and that's worse, that's breaking our laws."

"She didn't know it was against your laws, surely they'd take that into account?" Teddy argued.

Victor arched an eyebrow. "So you let go every mortal who claims they didn't know they were going over the speed limit, or didn't know what they were doing was against a law?"

"Damn," Teddy muttered, dropping his eyes.

"We'll figure something out," DJ assured the man quietly. "Victor's smart and powerful and his brother is the head of the council. He'll sort it out."

Victor managed not to wince at this claim. He didn't have a single idea as to what to do about it all. And Lucian may be his brother, but it didn't mean the man would show mercy here. Lucian Argeneau had a reputation for being one of the most cold-blooded bastards on the continent, and with good reason. Victor's instincts were shouting at him to grab Elvi and flee, hide, move to Europe maybe where the council might not follow.

"Anyway," DJ commented, "that's why Victor doesn't want to order blood in. He's trying to avoid any contact with the council or anyone close to the council until he sorts out the safest way to present this matter to them."

"Yes, I understand now." Harper looked thoughtful. "So, we too are now forced to depend on the goodness of these townspeople for our sustenance."

"And Elvi and Mabel," Edward pointed out. "Unless we'd care to get off our high horses and help, Elvi and Mabel are the ones who will be singing for our supper... or kissing for it as the case may be."

"No," Alessandro said indignantly. "They will not sing. I allow no woman to prostitution herself for me. I will do the prostitution for my own blood."

"And I," Harper murmured.

Victor glanced at Teddy. "So? What can we do to help?"

Brunswick hesitated, his gaze sliding around the fairgrounds, and then turned away. "Come with me. We'll go find Karen and Mike. They're on the committee for this thing."

Victor started to follow, slowing when Edward appeared at his side to murmur, "Once we've settled the issue of helping out, I think we should discuss how best to help you win the fair Elvi. You don't seem to be doing very well on your own."

"He's right," Harper said from his other side. "We'll put our heads together and come up with something. Don't you worry."

For some reason, their assurances only made him worry more.