“Don’t. It was wrong to give you the wine. It doesn’t make things better. It only makes you believe that it does.”
I was starting to feel shaky and dizzy. “Maybe that’s enough. If things can’t get better, than at least I can pretend they will.”
Growl sighed. “I will tell Falcone and Cosimo that we’re leaving. You will stay where you are while I’m gone.”
I leaned against the wall. I didn’t feel like going anywhere. The room was spinning and I was starting to feel hot. With another look at me, Growl headed off to where Cosimo was talking to Falcone. The crowd parted for him with fear and sick fascination, and he towered over them, strong and tall and proud, despite their whispers.
I wished I could be like that, but deep down I still cared what people said. It hurt to see them judging and pitying me. I closed my eyes against their scrutiny and soon lost all sense of time.
A touch on my shoulder roused me from my stupor. My eyelids felt heavy as I opened them. Growl scowled down at me, and I shied back from the anger on his face. “Never close your eyes around your enemies. You won’t survive like that.”
I smiled tiredly. “As if you ever take your eyes off me. Nobody can hurt me when you’re around. If someone ends up killing me, then it’s probably you.”
Growl didn’t deny it. He wrapped his fingers around my upper arm and steered me toward the door. I followed him in a trance-like state. When we got outside, the fresh air helped me regain my senses and I gulped down the oxygen eagerly.
But I still wasn’t in the best state of mind, and it took me a while to notice a man leaning against a car and smoking a cigarette. I didn’t know him, but Growl seemed to recognize him from the way his fingers on my arm tightened in warning.
“Nice catch,” the man called.
Growl ignored him and tried to pull me past him, but the man pushed away from the car, threw the cigarette down on the ground and smashed it with his shoe. He smirked. “How do you fit your big cock into that small lady mouth of hers?” He sounded drunk, and I swore to myself never to drink as much as tonight again.
Growl suddenly tore away from me and I stumbled but caught my balance in the last second, bracing myself against another car. I whirled around upon hearing a muffled scream. Growl had grabbed the man by the neck and thrown him down on the ground. He kicked him in the ribs twice before he leaned down and punched him in the face. The man moaned and blood spewed out of his nose and mouth. “Don’t,” Growl rasped in a voice that sent cold chills down my back. “Don’t ever talk like that again, or I’ll gut you and strangle you with your fucking bowels.”
The man coughed.
“Understood?” Growl asked, shaking the man roughly.
“Yeah,” gasped the man in a blood-soaked voice.
Growl wiped his hands on the man’s suit before he straightened up and sent one of the bellboys a warning look. Then he returned to me with a calm expression. No sign of his previous fury was visible.
“Why did you do that?” I asked as he led me toward his car, which was parked on the side of the road near the entrance gates.
Growl helped me into the passenger’s seat. “Because you’re mine and I won’t let anyone talk shit about you.”
“In the house, at the party, they were all talking about me.”
Growl looked back toward the brightly lit house, and for a moment I worried he’d storm back inside and beat up a few more guests, but then his gaze settled on me. “They were clever enough not to say anything when I could hear them, and most only feel sorry for you. They say bad things about me, not you.”
The way he stood there, with a few droplets of blood on his white shirt and cold determination on his striking face, he looked like my avenging angel. Who could be better to seek revenge than Growl? He knew how to hurt people, how to destroy them. Could I convince him to help my sister and mother? Even if he never let me go, perhaps he’d at least help them get away from Las Vegas and start anew. He was conflicted, I could tell. Could I make him go against Falcone after all? His amber eyes bored into mine, and a flicker of hope rose in me. I wouldn’t give up. He was my only chance.
Growl
I had been suspicious from the start. Why would Falcone invite us? Now I knew. It was to humiliate Cara, and by doing so, me. I had never cared about what people said, what Falcone said. I’d lived my life, tried to survive, never wanted or needed much.
Falcone’s only purpose tonight had been to humiliate Cara. My blood boiled at the memory. I didn’t let anyone humiliate something that was mine, especially Cara.
For some reason that girl meant something to me. I’d never cared for anyone, except for my dogs and perhaps myself, but with Cara, I wasn’t sure what was happening to me. I didn’t want to care about her. I knew she didn’t want me. What she was doing was a tactic, a way for her to survive what had been meant as a horrible punishment.
I didn’t know what was going on in her mind. Perhaps she didn’t hate me as much as I suspected. Sometimes she looked as if she didn’t loathe being around me that much. She enjoyed my touch and sex and my kisses, that was obvious. That was something I could understand, but beyond that, she remained a mystery to me.
And it didn’t matter either way. She was mine and I would protect her. Even against Falcone. That man had been ruining my life for far too long. I’d never found the motivation to go against him despite everything Falcone had done to me.
I wasn’t even sure why. I would kill anyone who tried to kill me. I wouldn’t even hesitate. But Falcone? I couldn’t identify what had been keeping me from revenge all these years. Falcone was my father, but I didn’t think that was why. I didn’t feel anything when I said or thought the word “father.” It was an empty word for me. And yet my father was still alive. Had I been hoping deep down that Falcone would see me as his son? I couldn’t answer that question. And now I didn’t have to anymore. It was irrelevant why I hadn’t taken revenge on the man yet.
Something had changed. And the reason for it was Cara. In some way, Falcone had set everything in motion. By giving Cara to me, he’d signed his own death warrant, because I wanted to help Cara get revenge. I wanted nothing more. Falcone always called me his killing machine. Falcone had created the monster, and now it would come to kill its creator.
Perhaps she’d stop hating me if I did this. I couldn’t hope for more than that. I knew nobody could ever truly come to care for me, and I’d accepted that.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Cara
Growl had been very quiet since we’d returned from the party yesterday. I couldn’t tell if he was still thinking about helping me.
Growl flicked his thumb over my clit, tearing me from my thoughts. He pushed a finger into me. “I want your full attention,” he rumbled, pushing into me again.
I nodded quickly, and banished any worry from my mind. This was my reprieve.
Suddenly Growl pulled his hand away. Confusion rushed through me. ”What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Touch yourself,” he ordered, sitting back on his haunches.
I flushed with embarrassment. The last time I’d done that had ended in mortification. “It’s not right,” I said.