Looking at her worried expression brought the weight of the recent argument crashing down around me; I could feel it compressing against my chest like a ton of bricks. Not liking the dark path my thoughts were taking, I asked Anna, “Where are the girls?”

“My mom has them. I thought you might want to talk about what happened. Will you tell me what’s going on?” She put a hand on my thigh and started squeezing me like a cat kneading its claws. I was sure she had meant the touch to be supportive, but it just seemed nervous to me, like she was sure I was about to crack her world apart. I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to. I just needed to be ticked for a while.

With a frown, I told her, “It’s just…once again, Kellan is hogging all the glory and I’m being shoved into the background. He is the talent, my ass. You know, babe, between Kellan’s selfishness, Matt’s dickheadedness, and Evan’s indifference…I don’t know what the fuck I’m still doing with them.” I was a little surprised that I’d said it out loud, that I’d finally admitted it to her so bluntly, but the longer it lingered in the air, the more right it felt.

Anna clearly didn’t agree. Her face shifted into an alarming shade of white, and her hand tightened around my thigh so hard I could almost feel the bruise forming. “What are you saying, Griff?” Her voice was shaky, like she was on the verge of losing her composure.

She looked stressed by this conversation, and with everything on her plate right now, what with my family and the new baby, I kind of felt like a selfish dick for adding to her hardships. I knew she thought of the band as family, and she wanted me to suck it up so we could all be happy. But we weren’t. Not really. Matt, Evan, and Kellan were happy, but I was stuck. There was nothing I could do about it though. Nothing but bitch, and that wasn’t getting me anywhere.

The look in her eyes was making my stomach twist into a knot, and I felt like Sam had me in a stranglehold, but…being stuck in a rut that I couldn’t get out of felt worse. Would she stay with me if I jumped this track? I didn’t know for sure, and that scared the shit of me. Wanting to be honest, I quietly told her, “I don’t know, Anna. I just don’t know.”

Anna started patting my knee and nodding, almost obsessively. “It’s okay. We’ll come up with something together. Just don’t…don’t do anything rash. Not without talking to me first, okay?”

Since there was nothing I could do at the moment anyway, I nodded. Anna’s face immediately brightened, which actually made me feel a little better. At least one of us was happy. And that would have to be enough. But even as I thought it, I knew her happiness wouldn’t be enough to tide me over forever. Something needed to change.

I skipped meeting up with the guys that night. Screw ’em. I was expecting an angry phone call, but I never got one. No calls at all. Guess we all needed a break from each other.

Anna needed a reprieve from the chaos of the house, so she’d organized a night out with some ex-coworkers from Hooters. She’d been on track to being on the chain’s management team until we’d financially sealed ourselves together. But with what I made, the paycheck there just wasn’t worth the time and effort. It made more sense for her to stay home with the kids. I think she missed it sometimes. The independence of having her own income, the adult interaction, the men ogling her, although I ogled her enough, so that shouldn’t really be a problem.

She was hesitant to leave me though, knowing I was in a mood. “I can reschedule if you want me to stay home tonight and talk some more. It’s no big deal.”

I knew that wasn’t 100 percent true though. Anna had been going stir-crazy at the house, especially with my family here. She wanted a break. She deserved a break. And…I really didn’t want to talk. “Nah, I’m fine, everything’s fine. Go have fun, you need it.”

With a smile sexy enough to be on every billboard in town, she kissed my cheek. “You’re the best. I won’t be gone long, I promise.” A few minutes later, she left, and oddly enough, without her presence near me, my mood darkened like the sun had just set.

My family wanted to chitchat, but I ignored them all and went to my room to sulk. Grabbing a tennis ball, I sat on the floor at the foot of the bed and played a game I liked to call Whack Imaginary Kellan in the Nose.

Repetitiously tossing the ball against the wall, watching it bounce on the floor, then catching it was soothing, and after a while, I stopped picturing Kellan’s face—a face that for some reason drove girls crazy—and zoned out. My mood evened as my mind dulled, and when I heard a light knock on the door, I automatically said, “Come in.”

When the door creaked open, I expected to see someone holding one of my girls with an exasperated look that said, Please take them. But instead, it was Chelsey at the door. She gave me a small wave while I resumed my peaceful habit.

Sliding onto the floor beside me, she slowly said, “So…today was interesting. What was that about with Kellan?”

Thinking about Denny’s comment—that the producers thought Kellan was the only one with talent—made my stomach roil again. When I caught the ball, I squeezed it so hard I thought it might split a seam. “Same old, same old. Everyone thinks he shits gold and the rest of us are just his backup dancers. Just once, I’d like people to notice me, ya know? Just once, I want to shine. I want…” I sighed. “I just want a chance…”