"It's fine," I cut in. "It looks worse than it feels."

Lie.

I tried to smile. "How are you, Alexis?"

Her eyes narrowed in confusion. "Um, I'm okay?"

"Cool." I placed my hands in my pockets and leaned against the doorjamb, faking a calmness that didn't exist. "So you're leaving?"

"Uhh . . ." She trailed off.

I chanced a glance at Ethan; his eyebrows were bunched, waiting for me to speak.

"Look, I don't want to get in the middle of your shit, but if you're leaving because of me, and what happened tonight, then don't. It's not worth what you guys have going. I'm the dick. I deserved it. Truthfully, I'd be kind of pissed if he didn't react the way he did. He's just looking out, protecting her, you know? It kind of makes him the good guy. The best kind of guy, actually." I felt Amanda's hand on my back. "I don't know." I shrugged. "I just think it'd be the wrong decision if you were to walk away. And trust me, I know all about wrong decisions."

***

By the time we went to bed, Alexis had calmed down and decided to stay. We could still hear them talking from where we lay in bed. They weren't arguing or screaming at each other, so at least there was that.

"That was nice of you—saying that shit about him." She reached over and held my hand.

"I didn't do anything. Besides, how many more people need to be caught up in our mess?"

She leaned up on her elbow and looked down at me. Raising an eyebrow, she spoke quietly. "You think we're a mess?"

I glanced at her quickly before looking away. Squeezing my eyes tight, I tried to ignore the pounding ache in my head. "I think that we fucked up. Obviously we can't help the way we feel about each other, but this sneaking around, lying to people—this shouldn't have happened. We should've waited. And now it's out, and I'm gonna have to work five times as hard to get him to understand." My eyes began to drift shut, the exhaustion of the day finally catching up to me. "I think I just need to—"

"Go to sleep, babe." She kissed me softly. I barely felt it. "I love you so much, Logan."

29

Amanda

I woke up the next morning in an empty bed. "Logan?"

He made a grunting sound from the bathroom.

My breath came out in a whoosh when I saw him. I didn't see him for a week after what had happened the night of his birthday, so I never had to deal with the aftermath of him physically. Now, it was staring me in the face. He stood with his arms stretched out, hands flat on the bathroom counter. His back was to me, but I could see his reflection in the mirror.

"I'm fine," he said.

"Don't lie." I stood next to him.

He turned and curled his arms around my neck, kissing my head once. A sheen of sweat covered his body. "I'm good." His voice was low, shaky. "I didn't take my meds last night, so I'm just a little out of it."

I went to hug him back, but barely got an arm around him before he winced in pain. I pulled back and looked at his ribs. Bruises that had just started to show last night were now completely formed. "How bad is it?"

He swallowed as his eyes roamed my face. He hesitated before he answered, "Bruised ribs, that's all. Definitely not broken, though. So that's good."

I didn't even know what expression was on my face, but it made him chuckle. "I just need to get some painkillers. I'll call Dad later."

"No! What are you going to tell him? That my brother beat you? You can't tell him that. I'd be so embarrassed."

"Quit it. He won't care."

"I do!" My voice rose. "I care."

"Okay," he tried to soothe me. "I'll work something out. It'll be fine."

"Great." I rolled my eyes. "Now you're comforting me when I should be the one comforting you."

"Quit being sulky."

I pouted.

Then he smirked. "Caveman Logan want some breakfast."

I stared down at his junk.

"Not that Caveman Logan." He shook his head, but his tone was amused. "Jeez, you're such a dirty girl."

I tried my best to lighten the mood. "I could be a dirty girl."

He eyed me up and down, inhaled deeply, and then winced.

I grimaced.

"Sorry, babe." He held his side. "I think I'm going to be out of commission for a while."

I pouted. "Well then, last night was all for nothing. You're kind of useless to me now."

Logan

Tristan sucked in a breath with a hiss when he saw me sitting at the dining table. Alexis followed it up with a loud gasp. I didn't think it was that bad, but then again, they didn't see me the days after my last beating. This was nothing.

"You look like ass," Alexis said, flopping down on the seat next to me.

"Did someone say ass?" Tristan chirped. "I like ass."

The girls laughed. I spat out my cereal.

Ethan walked into the room.

Dead. Fucking. Silence.

The sound of my spoon repeatedly hitting the bowl broke through the quiet. I watched my hand shake uncontrollably. "Fuck." I dropped the spoon and straightened my fingers. My breathing became erratic. I tried to calm it, but it just made the pain in my ribs worse. I cursed again and folded over myself.

Amanda's voice was quiet. "You broke his ribs, E." She linked her fingers with mine.