Colin lifted Parker’s hand. “You should hear Mom tell this story.”

“Was she horrified?”

Matt shook his head. “First thing out of her mouth was directed at me. ‘Matthew, what are you showing your sister?’”

“Asshat pointed his finger my way so fast my head spun.” Grace nudged his foot with hers.

“I threw Grace under the bus, put the bus in reverse, and backed over her again. She didn’t see it coming. Screw chivalry. Besides, I knew Mom would go easy on her and I’d be banned from the internet for life.”

Erin found herself laughing and completely relaxed. “What was the punishment?”

“An entire dinner conversation about sex.”

“That sounds painful,” Parker said with a moan.

“To hear Mom tell it, she was dying of laughter the whole time. Her favorite memory of that night was when I asked why a woman would want to put a dick in her mouth.”

Erin’s head fell back and her shoulders shook with laughter. “Oh my God, that’s hysterical.”

Parker was cry-laughing right along with her.

“What did your dad say to all this?”

“All he added was one word . . .” Matt looked at Grace and they both said it together. “Foreplay.”

That had Erin laughing even harder.

Grace yawned. “You have to admit, from that day on if we had any questions . . . and I do mean any, Mom and Dad gave it to us straight up.”

“I guess that’s why you’re such a close family,” Parker said.

Erin felt her giggles fading and memories of her own family push in. Not the dark hole she wanted to think about after she’d been drinking. When Grace yawned again, Erin took the cue to suggest cleaning up. “We should probably put this stuff away.”

Parker scooted forward and stood. “It is getting late.”

Everyone mobilized at that point in a group effort to make quick work of the mess they’d created with their impromptu barbeque and pool party.

“We’ve got this,” Colin told her. “Matt still needs to show you how to use your new alarm system.”

“Oh, that’s right.” And just like that, her nerves returned. Erin pulled the cover-up closer together and turned toward Matt. “You said it was easy, right?”

“Yup. I’ll show you . . .” He walked the path to her front door and opened the screen for her. Apparently the chivalry that he denied his sister in junior high wasn’t gone now.

She turned the main lights on in her living room and kitchen.

The brighter it became, the less her nerves danced on her skin.

“I control it from this, right?” She pointed to a portable monitor that looked like a typical tablet.

“Yes, and the app you downloaded on your phone earlier.” He walked toward the larger monitor in the kitchen, and she followed. Matt pressed a button and the screen showed the two camera angles outside her space. One was at the front door; the other showed a wider angle taking in all but the very back of the house. “I’ve set this as your home screen so you can see what’s going on outside at any given time. If Scout runs by and makes the emergency lighting go on, you can check it out here before opening your door.”

He scooted a little closer and tapped the screen again. “If you press one image, it fills the screen so you can see a bigger image. Press it twice, it goes back to the double images.” He then ran through the motions of showing her how to set the alarm for when she left and disengage when she returned home. The night settings were what she was really looking forward to. The alarm would be set so if anyone tried to sneak in while she slept, it would scream and the authorities would be called. Maybe she could sleep without having to be exhausted.

“Show me how the phone works.”

Twenty minutes later she’d fiddled with both monitors, setting and resetting the system until she felt like she had the hang of it.

She stared at her phone and smiled when she saw the image the camera at her door displayed. “I can’t tell you what this means to me.”

Matt leaned against the kitchen counter, his grin spread wide. “You’re welcome.”

She paused, realized she hadn’t said thank you yet.

Erin reached out and said, “Thank you.”

His eyes drifted to where she’d touched him. The tips of her fingers were on his forearm. How they’d landed there she couldn’t say.

“You were flirting with him!”

“I wasn’t. I wouldn’t.”

“You were all over him.”

“I tripped on the carpet. All he did was keep me from falling.” Her voice trembled. The look on his face told her whatever she said wasn’t sinking in.

He took a step closer. Her feet didn’t move. She knew she couldn’t retreat or his punishment would be worse. She couldn’t swallow, couldn’t breathe.

“Who is going to catch you now?”

Erin closed her eyes and flinched.

“You’re okay. Put your head between your legs.” Matt’s soothing voice was beside her. Her vision cleared and she was sitting on one of the two stools that lived under the kitchen counter. Matt’s hand was on her back gently pushing her head down. “Just breathe.”

The beat of her heart was keeping time with a speed-metal band from the eighties. Her stomach sat in her throat, and she didn’t have any feeling in her fingertips.

And she was cold.

So cold.

She placed both hands over her face and pulled in a few more gulps of air to try and calm her nerves. “I’m sorry,” she managed as she slowly sat up.

“It’s okay.”

It was far from okay. “I’m sorry,” she said again. A habit she had still yet to break. Repeated apologies never stopped the fists from flying. But without them, it was always worse.

“It happens.” Matt knelt in front of her so she had to look down to see his face. Compassion, understanding, and a whole lot of concern laced the piercing look in his eyes.

“I’m—”

He lifted a finger in the air. “No more apologies. I’ll get you some water.”

She opened her mouth to stop him, but he was already up and walking to her sink. Erin took the few moments she had while Matt opened a couple of cupboards to locate a glass and fill it with tap water.

Slow breath in . . . slow breath out.

Memories, or maybe she should call them flashbacks, slammed on her like the one she’d just had and dropped her to her knees so often that even driving was sometimes dangerous. This was the second time this had happened in front of Matt. The first, Parker had told him she had a blood sugar issue.

Matt walked around the counter and pressed the glass in her hand. “Here.” She was surprised to see his fingers trembling nearly as much as hers.

“Thank you.” She took a sip. “Maybe I should have some orange juice.”

Matt knelt a second time, his eyes found hers and held. “Sugar isn’t going to help.”

She opened her mouth to argue.

He tilted his strong chin to the side as if he were telling her he was onto her lie. “Feeling better?” he asked.

“I can feel my fingers again.”

She looked down at his clenched hands. When she did, he flexed his fingers and rubbed them on his knees. “Did I do something to bring that on?”