“Grow up, Adam!” Mom shouted as Dad stormed from the room. Her forehead fell to her hands. “We’ll figure this out, Aria. Okay? If this is really what you want to do, then we will figure this out, with or without your father’s approval. But if you can, you should tell the father of the child. It’s only right.”

She left the room with her shoulders drooped low and her stress high.

Mike stood in the foyer, still holding his piece of paper. He grimaced. “I got into UW-Madison,” he said to the now empty room. He crumpled up the paper and walked away. “Not that anyone gives a damn.”

* * *

That night after Mom left for work, I ran to the store to grab a few things. When I returned home, I spent hours in the kitchen baking, enlisting Grace to help me. She told me more horror stories about my pregnancy while she cracked the egg yolks into the cake batter.

Once all of the baking was done, she and I dressed the living room in red and white streamers and balloons. We made signs and hung them around the room, and when everything was in place, I had Grace run up to get Mike, because I knew he wouldn’t want to see me after I ruined his big news.

When he came down, he saw the room decked out in UW-Madison colors with the worst decorated cake ever sitting in the center of the coffee table. It had an animal drawn on it, which was supposed to be a badger, but somehow came out looking like a dead dog.

“Congratulations!” we shouted at Mike as he walked in.

He tried his best not to smile, but it slipped out. “I thought you were an artist? That cake is ugly,” he remarked, walking into the room.

“Hey! I made that!” Grace said, throwing a plastic spoon at Mike.

He retracted his statement. “By ugly I meant perfect.”

KitKat woke up from her nap a few minutes later, and the four of us sat in the living room eating cake and celebrating Mike getting into school.

“I’m sorry for everything,” I said to him, knowing I was the reason our parents had been so thrown off lately.

He glanced my way before grabbing more cake. “If anyone gives you any more shit at school, just send them to me. I’ll handle it.”

* * *

The next night, James and Nadine came over to hang out with Mike. As always, Nadine and James stopped in to check on me. I guessed James found a way to fall back in love with her. I hated how wonderful Nadine was—she deserved more than her current boyfriend who was much more interested in meddling in my life than focusing on her.

“Any updates?” Nadine asked about the baby.

I nodded. “I decided to give the baby up for adoption.” My stare moved to James. “I want Simon’s parents to have the baby. They’ve been struggling for so long, and I really want the baby to grow up in a loving family with a mom and dad who are together. I’m supposed to tell the father to get his permission, but I think he’ll be fine with the idea.”

James’ eyebrows lowered and his mouth tightened. Nadine frowned for a split second before she smiled. “I think that’s so brave, actually, Aria.” She nodded. “You’re really brave.”

He cleared his throat before agreeing with his girlfriend. “Yeah, I think that’s great. I’m sure the dad would be fine with the idea.”

29 Levi

It was funny how the things you once hated became the things you missed the most. Mom hadn’t called me in a few days. The phone calls that I’d hated with her at random hours of the night had become a part of my routine. I missed her begging for me to come home. I missed her telling me how awful I was treating her. I missed her voice, her overprotective nature, her overbearing love.

When I called the house, she would answer, but she’d tell me she was busy and hang up.

I felt as if she was over it—over the idea of trying to get me to come home to be with her.

So instead of her worrying about me, I began worrying about her.

Where was her mind?

Was she healthy?

Was she happy?

Was she still struggling with fake fears and harsh realities?

I called Denise to see if she’d checked in on Mom like she’d promised. When she answered, she sounded extremely pleased. “Levi, she’s checking into a health clinic!” Denise exclaimed.

“What? Why? Is she okay?”

“She’s going to St. John’s Music Wellness Clinic. They’ve been known for their use of music to help people who suffer like your mom. It’s the first place that I wanted to send her, but she never would’ve agreed before.”

“What made her change her mind?”

“I don’t know. You know you’re mom—when she’s up, she’s up. And when she’s down, she’s down. I guess we caught her in an up moment. But no matter what, this is good news, Levi. Really, really good news!”

“How can I talk to her?” I asked.

She went silent for a moment. “I think we should let her get settled first. They are starting her on new medicines and treatments. Maybe give her a week or two.”

Denise went on to ask about Dad, and I proceeded to lie because she would’ve been like Mom and wanted me to come home if she knew how crappy things were. When she hung up, I still kept thinking about Mom.

I missed her so much lately. Her confused mind and all.

Maybe this time would be different.

Maybe this time, the medicine and treatment would work.

I went to the woods that night and played my violin for her. I stood on the largest rock, allowing the cold air to pass by me. I remembered how she used to play music in the forest with me back home. She was always the better musician.