“Worry about what?” I asked.

“About my own sanity, I suppose.”

“You have never shown any sign of the madness that haunts some of the noble lines of faerie.”

“Oh, it’s not just the noble lines, Meredith; some of the lesser fey are just as unpredictable, they just don’t have the power of life and death to indulge their insanity.”

It was my turn to study her. “What makes you say that?”

“The Fear Dearg, for one; you know we have one of them living here in Los Angeles.”

“I’ve met him,” I said.

She shuddered. “I remember the wars against them. It was like their entire race was as bad as Andais, Taranis, and Cel combined. It’s why we took their magic away.”

“The Fir Dhaeg said the sidhe also took their females, so though they live forever they’re dead as a race.”

She nodded, rubbing her arms again. “We could not work a spell to kill them, or destroy their evil entirely, but we destroyed what we could of them.”

“The Fir Dhaeg said that I could give him back his name. That the curse the sidhe placed upon them could be cured by a royal chosen by Goddess and faerie.”

“I do not know the details of the curse, but all curses must have a cure; it’s part of the balance. Nothing is truly forever, nothing is that is made cannot be unmade, and that which is unmade has the possibility of being reborn.”

“What happened to the Fir Dhaeg females? Doyle would not tell me details after we met the one here in L. A.”

“We could not destroy them, Meredith, for they were as much a part of faerie as the sidhe, but we were able to kill them at a price.”

“What price?” I asked.

“That we would take in their essence, absorb them. We would tie the Fir Dhaeg to the sidhe forever, so that if they reincarnated they would come back as one of us. The hope was that our bright blessings from the Goddess and Her Consort would cleanse their evil, but I wonder sometimes if the opposite happened.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I wonder sometimes if the Fir Dhaeg contaminated the sidhe with their darkness.”

“Taranis and Andais were already king and queen by then; you can’t blame their evil on the Fir Dhaeg.”

“I suppose not, but I remember the day that it was done. The females didn’t die; they faded and the energy went somewhere, Meredith. What if it went not into the land, or sky, or plants, or water, but into the ones that did the cursing? Andais was part of that spell; your father was not.”

“You’re saying that in cursing the Fir Dhaeg, Andais may have … what, become one herself?”

Maeve shrugged. “Maybe, or maybe she was mad even then and we just hadn’t realized it.”

“Faerie chose her to be queen of the Unseelie Court, so she was fit to rule once,” I said.

“She was a great war leader, so yes, she was fit once.”

“Have you discussed your theory with anyone else?”

“No, by the time I thought of it I was in exile. I had a lot of time to think upon old things while I was alone.”

“I’ll share your theory with Doyle and see what he thinks.”

“Remember that he was a part of the spell, too.”

“Doyle is not evil,” I said.

“I didn’t say he was, but being around evil changes a person, even if you’re killing it on the battlefield.”

I tried to read her face and couldn’t. “Why tell me this?”

“I don’t know; perhaps I’ve wanted to tell someone my idea for a very long time.”

“You lived in the high court of faerie for centuries, Maeve, and then in Hollywood for decades; you don’t say things without understanding how it will affect people, or how you hope it will affect people, so what’s your point? Why tell me? Why now?”

“I don’t know, and that is the honest answer; it just seemed time.”

I shook my head. “I wish I believed that.”

“I would never mean to make you doubt Doyle.”

I laughed then. “I don’t doubt Doyle; nothing you could say would make me do that.”

She controlled her face, but for just a moment I saw she was unhappy. Why would she want to divide me from Doyle? Out loud I said, “Do you have an old grudge against Doyle?”

“Why would you say that?”

“He’s been the left hand of the queen for centuries, and their court was often at war with yours, so just answer the question. Do you have a grudge against him?”

“If I had to choose a king to follow I would prefer the energy of sunlight and life, not darkness and death.”

“Doyle was who faerie crowned as my king.”

“Your Unseelie king,” she said.

I nodded. “And faerie crowned me Sholto’s Queen of the Sluagh.”

She couldn’t hide her distaste. “They are the stuff of nightmares.”

“True, but the Goddess saw fit to make me their queen all the same.”

“I would wonder who faerie would choose for you if it were the Seelie throne you were sitting upon, or a new throne of faerie. Who would be that king for you, Meredith?”

“Since we gave up the crowns that faerie offered us, and I can’t go back to visit Sholto’s kingdom for fear of Taranis, I don’t think it matters. I think I’ve turned down too many thrones for the Goddess to offer me another.”