Up in Flames Page 33
Rush was studying me like he didn’t believe a word I was saying. “Yeah,” he said slowly. “With Blaire.”
“Want to walk down to the water?” I asked. That shot both his eyebrows up.
“Why? What is this about, Nan?” His stern tone made me smile.
“I’m not dying, and I’m not pregnant. Can we just go talk?”
His tension eased some, and he finally relaxed. “Sure.”
I asked about Nate and the pregnancy. As Rush began talking about his family, I wanted to stay focused, but my mind was wandering back to Gannon. Back to the time I’d spent with him. “When you met Blaire, did you know? That she’d change everything for you?” I asked when he fell silent.
“Yeah. Scared the shit out of me, but I knew.”
I figured as much. He had never been the same since the night she walked into his house. As much as I had hated her at the time, I saw the way she made his eyes light up. Was this how he had felt? Like I was feeling? Wanting someone you couldn’t have?
Major
I wasn’t sure what I’d done wrong, but I’d messed up somehow. Nan wasn’t mentally with me. She was off somewhere else, like she’d been all day today, and I didn’t know how to bring her back. The worst part was that I knew Cope could see us where we were currently sitting. He knew I was failing.
“Dinner was great. Thanks. I was going to pay for it, though,” I said, wondering if the fact that she’d paid for dinner was bothering her. She’d ordered it, and it had arrived before I did, so I wasn’t around to pay. It would be silly if that was her problem.
“No, that’s fine. I’m glad you enjoyed it,” she said with a forced smile, then turned her attention back to the movie.
It was something with guns and action. She’d chosen it for me, I was sure, and most of the time, I loved watching movies. Tonight, though, I was trying to romance Nan, and it wasn’t working. She wasn’t even trying to cuddle up to me like she used to do. I wasn’t used to this behavior.
I cut my eyes to the hidden camera pointed at us and felt like flicking the asshole off. Watching the movie here was a bad idea. It was like Cope was judging me.
“You enjoying the movie?” I asked, realizing it sounded stupid and pathetic to try to get her attention.
“Yeah, sure, its great,” she said, without even a glance my way this time.
It was like she was mentally counting down the minutes until I was gone. That stung like a stake through the heart. Damn, she was seriously not interested in me being around at all.
My ego was nonexistent at this point. I couldn’t keep this up. I needed another plan. If Nan wouldn’t talk to me casually, she sure as hell wasn’t going to chat with me about her past boyfriends.
I gave up trying to get her to soften up or at least care that I was there. Leaning back, I watched the movie, and it wasn’t bad. I enjoyed it.
Nan fell asleep.
After covering her up and locking the door behind me, I left the house. Tonight had been a bust. It could have been my fault for not planning things out better. I should have gone in with a game plan. Cope would have had a play-by-play. That was why he was the best. Damn him.
Maybe I should have let him finish it. Maybe this thing with Nan wasn’t more than me just wanting to prove myself. Hell, if the woman didn’t want me, then she didn’t want me.
If I were a lesser man, I’d take the rejection and walk. But I was Major fucking Colt, and I welcomed challenges. I owned them. I took what was thrown at me and destroyed it. I could figure Nan out. She was a woman, after all.
Before I went and drew up a new game plan, though, I was going to find that waitress from the club today. Hannah or Tabitha, or was it Tammy? Oh, hell, who cared? I knew what she looked like. I’d figure it out.
Nan
The heaviness of sleep held me as I felt my body being lifted and carried.
It was his smell. Inhaling deeply, I clung to it, turning toward what I knew was the wide strength of his chest. This was what I’d been waiting for. Sleep. He came to me then, and I needed him. Every thought centered on him.
Sleep was my friend, my sanctuary. The only place I found happiness. There were no shallow people who called themselves my friends, no need to pretend, just us. Gannon and I. In a world that couldn’t really exist, but I wanted it to so badly.
I wrapped a hand around his thick arm as he began lowering me onto my bed. I didn’t want him to let go. Would he vanish now? Was this all I would get tonight? It wasn’t enough. I wanted to taste his skin, feel his hard body move over mine. I wanted him to exercise total control over me and lick my body, close to pain but with a feather’s touch.
I mumbled a plea and kept my eyes tightly closed, hoping I wouldn’t wake to find him gone.
“Shhh, sweet baby. I’m not leaving you yet.” His dark whisper made me tremble, and I almost wept in relief.
He was still here.
I heard the rustle of clothing, and I wanted to see him, but I feared that would wake me. So I denied myself the beauty of his body in hopes of keeping him longer. The back of his hand stroked my bare arm and continued down to my waist. I was naked. My dreams were manipulating themselves to please me. We were closer than I’d thought.
“Turn over.” His tone was hard and cold.
Instead of scaring me, it excited me. Something that only made sense with Gannon. I trusted him, yet a part of me feared him, too. The combination was heady. It was unlike anything I’d ever tasted. My fantasy.
I arched my back, and his palm pressed it down. “Don’t. I tell you when to move this beautiful body.” His fingertip continued to trail over my body. Each touch a caress so hot it burned my skin. “Don’t wiggle, or I’ll have to slap you.”