Hold on Tight Page 21

What the hell . . . ?

Sienna was just laying it out there. Why? I’d told her that I couldn’t be what she wanted. I had tried to hold her at arm’s length, so why would she walk into my apartment and tell me she could never get enough of me? That was brave. Unbelievably so. It was time I admitted the truth too.

“If I get a taste of what it feels like to be inside you, I won’t be able to stop. Ever. I’ve been addicted to you since I was seventeen years old. I fought it because you were my brother’s. Then I fought it because I wasn’t worthy of you. It’s my fault he wrapped his car around that tree that night. I’d threatened him, and he was drunk and ran off.”

I couldn’t tell her the rest. That I had been mad that he had gotten Kimmy pregnant and had been cheating on Sienna for over a year. I never wanted her to know that. Ever.

“Dustin made his own mistakes,” she replied. “He chose to drink and party, and he chose to drive his car when he shouldn’t have. I begged him not to drink, but he always laughed me off, saying he was only having fun and wasn’t hurting anyone. I let myself believe him. But in the end Dustin made the reckless decision that took his life. He missed out on knowing our son. He missed out on his future as a star. He missed out on so much. But it was no one’s fault but his. I blamed myself for so long, but I know now that he made that decision. Not me. And not you.”

No one had ever told me that. I knew it was true, but no one had ever said those words to me. Still, I knew what I’d said to Dustin to send him racing back to Sienna in a panic. He was worried I was going to tell her what he was doing. He wanted to stop me. I’d never imagined he would get behind the wheel.

“I loved him. I miss him every damn day,” I said, gripping the edge of the countertop. I never talked about Dustin like this. It hurt too much.

“I loved him too. He was my best friend. He gave me the greatest gift on earth before he left me. I have Micah.”

I wanted her memories of Dustin to remain intact. I owed my brother that much. Because I wasn’t staying away from her anymore. She was right—Dustin had made his own decisions, and he hadn’t cherished what he had. I would. I’d been cherishing her from afar for so damn long.

“Stay. Eat some cake with me,” I said, not wanting her to leave. “Where’s Micah?”

“Your parents’,” she replied.

“Can you stay the night?”

Her eyes went wide, and she took a deep breath. Then she nodded. “Yes.”

I shoved away from the counter. “Sienna.”

“Yes,” she replied a little breathlessly as I closed the space between us.

“Can we eat the cake later? Much later? Like for breakfast?”

She nodded again just before my mouth captured hers.

SIENNA

He was everywhere all at once. My head was spinning, and if he hadn’t backed me up against the wall, I would have crumpled to the ground. It was overwhelming and thrilling.

Dewayne sucked on my bottom lip before trailing kisses across my jaw, then settled in to torture the spot behind my ear. “Wanted to do this for so long,” he whispered against my skin. “This one spot. All over. Fuck, Sienna, I don’t know if I can go slow. I want to so much, but right now I just wanna be inside you.”

I wanted Dewayne any way I could have him. Knowing that he wanted more with me than one night and that he wanted this made me willing to grant his every wish. “We have all night,” I told him.

Then I was off the ground, and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he walked me through a door off to the side of the kitchen and straight to a king-size bed in the middle of the room. “Naked and on my bed. Fucking want that. Now,” he said, jerking his shirt off and tossing it away. He reached for my shirt, and I raised my hands willingly and let him pull it off me. His eyes looked like they had caught fire when he took in the sight of me in my bra.

“Take it off. I want to watch,” he said, not looking away from my chest.

I unhooked the back clasp and let my bra fall forward. Then I pulled it off my arms and moved it aside. I didn’t care where it ended up. I just cared about the look of hunger on Dewayne’s face, and knowing it was me he was looking at like that.

It sounded like he muttered something like “magic tits,” but I wasn’t sure I’d heard him right. His hands were on the waistband of my shorts and tugging them down, so all thoughts of his muttering left me. I had only been completely na**d with one man, and he had been a boy. He had also never taken his time with me like this. Or looked at me like he was in awe.

Dewayne knelt down in front of me and pushed my knees apart. I sucked in a breath as he kissed my knee and looked up at me through hooded eyes. “I love these red curls. So f**king hot.”

Oh my.

“Lay back, Sienna. And keep these legs open for me,” he said as he stood up and unzipped his jeans. I wanted to watch him shove those jeans down, but I did as he asked, trying hard to see him. I had fantasized about all of him for a long time too.

“I’m gonna have to taste you first. I want inside you, baby, but I gotta kiss this,” he said as his hand cupped me between the legs. I was exposed, and I should have felt vulnerable. But it was Dewayne. It felt right. It was exciting.

Dewayne lowered himself to his knees and picked up my right foot, then kissed it before putting my leg over his shoulder. Then he did the same with the left. The warmth of his breath was so close I shivered.

“Smell like the f**king candy store,” he said just before his tongue slid against me. The sensation was amazing. I cried out and reached for something. I ended up with handfuls of the blanket underneath me.

With each stroke of his tongue my body bucked, and tremors of pleasure coursed through me.

“Dewayne,” I whimpered as the intensity got to be too much. I was so close to something I’d only had with myself, alone in my room.

“You close?” he asked, lifting his head. His tongue came out to lick his lips, and nothing in my life had ever been as sexy as that man.

“Yes,” I replied, breathless.

He bent his head, then pressed a kiss to the sensitive spot that always needed the most attention, and I moaned, unable to keep quiet. This was all more than I had ever expected.

Then he stood up, and the solid, muscled body covered in colorful tattoos was there on display. I was so close to an orgasm that just seeing him like this almost sent me over the edge. Every hard line of his body was beautiful. I wanted to touch him everywhere. Then my eyes dropped and went wide with sudden panic. I wasn’t an expert on penis size since I had only been with a sixteen-year-old boy, but that was big. Maybe too big. Sex had always been uncomfortable with Dustin, and sometimes hurt. He said it was because he was too big and I was too tight, but that . . . Oh no.

“Much as I like you looking, I’m not feeling very patient right now,” he said before lowering himself over me. “God, you’re perfect,” he said, then kissed the tip of one of my breasts.

He wasn’t going to think I was perfect when he didn’t fit inside me. Or when I was screaming in pain and begging him to stop. This was what I had wanted for so long, and now I was positive it wasn’t going to happen. I tensed and closed my eyes, praying that I didn’t embarrass myself and do something like cry. If I could just suffer through the pain . . . I would do anything for Dewayne. I just hoped I could do it quietly.

“Sienna?” Dewayne’s voice was concerned. Of course it was. I was acting like an idiot and he hadn’t even tried to get inside me yet.

I opened my eyes and looked up at him. I was so sorry. I wanted this. I wanted him. But the pain. It had been bad at first with Dustin, and I knew once a guy got going he couldn’t stop just because you were crying in pain. He had to finish.

“What’s wrong, baby?” he said as he brushed my hair out of my face with his thumb, then ran it over my bottom lip. He was so sweet. Who would have thought Dewayne Falco could be this sweet?

“It always hurt . . . before. Always. And you’re bigger . . .” God, I hated this. Reminding him I’d slept with his younger brother was a mood killer.

He frowned. “It should have only hurt a little bit the first time.”

I had to explain this. As humiliating as it was, I had to tell him. “I’m, uh . . . It always hurt. I never enjoyed it.” There. I admitted it.

Dewayne closed his eyes and let out a hissing sound through his teeth. When he opened them, he locked his gaze with mine. “This won’t hurt. I swear to you, Sienna, it’ll feel good, baby. I’ll make sure you see stars.”

I almost believed him. With that fierce look in his eyes, it was easy to believe. But the fact remained that he was much bigger than Dustin had been. “But I haven’t had sex in a long time. I was tight then.” I had also had a kid, but that was five years ago, so any stretching that did was more than likely all gone now.

Dewayne lowered his head until his lips brushed my ear. “You’re tight now. But you’re also so f**king wet and ready,” he said in a whisper, just as his finger stroked the tender heat between my legs.

I gasped and Dewayne chuckled. “That’s it, baby. Let me take care of you. I’m not ever gonna hurt you again. In any way. I swear it.”

Even if it did hurt, I would take it. This was Dewayne. I wanted Dewayne. Deep down I had always wanted Dewayne.

He leaned up, and I watched him reach for a small square foil wrapper, which he tore open with his teeth. Then rolled the condom down. If I wasn’t so scared of sex, I could appreciate it more.

Then he was over me again, and his lips found mine. The gentle glide of his tongue as he took what he wanted eased my fear just before I felt his tip nudge my entrance. “Easy, baby. I’m gonna be gentle. But you need to relax,” he said in a husky, strained voice as he tucked his head into the curve of my neck.

Slowly he eased inside me. With each inch that filled me there was no pain, only pleasure. Maybe I wasn’t as tight anymore. I hoped so.

“You okay?” he asked me, holding himself up over me. I smiled in relief and nodded.

Our gazes locked as he eased in more and I lifted my h*ps to take him. The stretching felt good and the fullness was incredible. But more than that . . . this was right. I knew it now. What had been wrong all those years ago—it hadn’t been Dustin who had claimed my heart. I just loved him like you would a friend. He was what I knew.

Dewayne, however, made me feel things no one ever had before. I had been too young to realize it then, but now it was all very clear. This was the Falco boy I was always meant to be with.

“Sienna, you gotta stop lifting that sweet ass, baby. This is the f**king tightest pu**y in the world, and all I want to do is move hard and fast. But I’m taking it slow. Help me take it slow.”

He wanted to move but he wasn’t. He was being gentle for me. I didn’t know men could go slowly. With that realization, Dewayne took another little piece of my heart. I wanted to protect myself from getting hurt, but I trusted him. I trusted him more than I’d ever trusted anyone. Besides, I wasn’t sure he hadn’t taken my heart years ago and not given it back. There wasn’t much left for me to protect anymore.

“It feels good. It doesn’t hurt at all. I want you,” I assured him.

With that bit of encouragement, he sank into me completely and let out a groan of pleasure. “God, woman, you’re squeezing the hell out of me.”

Feeling braver, I wrapped my legs around him and arched into him.

With his body that was meant to be appreciated for the sculpted perfection that it was, Dewayne held himself over me as he began rocking in and out of me. I wrapped my hands around his bulging biceps and held on. Each time he sank into me fully, he touched something that sent sparks of such intense shocks through my body that I wanted to beg him to go faster. I wanted that feeling.

There was moaning and begging that I was positive was coming from me. After the fourth time he brushed that special spot deep inside me, I became so delirious with need that I no longer knew what I was saying. I just never wanted it to stop.

The explosion of sensation that went off in my body shocked me. All I could do was hold on to Dewayne as I cried out his name. Trusting him not to let me go, I fell into the uncharted bliss without fear.

Somewhere far away I heard Dewayne shout, and his body tensed over mine. I wrapped myself tighter around him as he eased down on top of me. The ability to move had been taken from me already. A lazy, smooth heaven enveloped me, and I wanted to share it with Dewayne in my arms.

“Magic f**king pussy,” he whispered as his forehead dropped to my collarbone. His breathing was hard as he gasped and shuddered. “Fuck,” he said, then pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

A giggle built inside me, and I didn’t even try to hold back. I was happy. So very happy.

Dewayne lifted his head and grinned at me. “Why you laughing, Little Red?”

I pressed my lips together to control the giggles. “You called my, uh . . . you know . . . magic.”

A smirk touched his mouth, and I wanted nothing more than to kiss those full red lips. “It is magic. Which means you’re stuck with me. Never thought I’d find magic pussy. Never wanted it, but damn, I do now. I intend to keep you.”

I wanted to be kept, but I had only really wanted that with Dewayne.

I touched his lips with my fingers, and he pulled one of my fingers into his mouth and sucked. The fire inside me began to stir again as I watched his mouth on my skin. He let it pop free. “I need to make sure you’re okay. Check you out personally and see if everything feels good and I didn’t hurt you. Then I can make you messy again.”