Cain's Identity Page 43
Faye turned back to the dresser and gripped the handles, but before she could shut the drawer, Cain was behind her and captured her hands with his, immobilizing her.
“Then why are you packing?”
His breath ghosted over her skin, making her shiver. She wanted nothing more than to lean back against his strong chest and let him catch her, but instead she remained stiff and unmoving. She couldn’t allow herself to be weak. It would only make it harder to leave.
“Because it changes nothing. I have no right to live in this suite anymore.”
“I see.” He released her hands and stepped back.
Faye pulled a deep breath into her lungs, hoping it would strengthen her, but it had the opposite effect. It made her only more aware of his presence and of what she’d lost.
She changed the subject. “I’m happy that you’re alive and have returned to us. Your clan needs you.”
“How about you?” Cain asked unexpectedly.
“I’m not important now that you’re back.”
“Why do you say that?”
Faye sighed. “Because it’s the truth. I don’t belong here. It’s time I realized that and moved on.”
Cain’s hands on her shoulders turned her to face him. “You’re planning to leave the kingdom?”
She nodded, her heart getting heavier by the second. “Not this minute, of course. I have to make arrangements first. If it’s all right with you, I’ll stay another week or two until I’ve sorted things out and know where to go.”
“You can’t just leave.”
A sad smile stole onto her lips. She appreciated that he was decent enough to make an attempt at convincing her to stay. “In the end it will be better for all involved.” She would never be able to bear it to have to meet the new woman he would eventually install in the palace.
“Better for whom?” he ground out.
Surprised at his harsh tone, Faye looked at him and noticed the tempest that seemed to rage in his eyes.
“I’m sorry. I can see that my presence upsets you, and that’s the last thing I want.”
“It’s not your presence that upsets me, but your words,” he corrected her. “Why do you want to leave?”
“Isn’t that obvious?” she asked. Because to her it was. “You made it clear to me when I came to you that you don’t want me anymore.”
Cain studied her with his dark eyes. “It’s not that simple.” He shoved a hand through his hair and turned away from her. “I’ve been away for a long time. I’m not the same man anymore.”
Her heart bled for him. What horrors had he endured during his captivity?
“Much happened while I was gone. Things I can’t explain right now.”
Faye pressed her lips together so she wouldn’t cry. As much as she wanted to know what had happened to him so she could help him heal, she couldn’t bear the thought that he’d confess that he’d met another woman and fallen in love with her.
“I can’t pretend that the last twelve months didn’t happen, don’t you see that, Faye?”
She nodded to herself. “That’s why it’s better that I’m leaving now,” she concluded. “So you can be free to do as you please.” So he could bring the woman he loved. “To start a new life.”
“A new life.”
Faye pushed back the tears that became more urgent with every second. “I’m sorry, Cain, I need to . . . I have to . . .” Unable to complete her sentence, she tried to dash past him, but his hand clamped over her upper arm and pulled her back.
“I want my old life back,” he said, his eyes boring into hers as if she had the key to it.
Cain wasn’t the same man anymore. She could see that now so clearly. He’d changed. Whatever he’d been through had made him more inscrutable. Where she’d previously been able to interpret his state of mind, she now met with an obsidian wall that was as impenetrable as Fort Knox. And as well guarded as the White House.
Cain was hiding his feelings from her.
No, she wouldn’t be his toy to play with as he pleased. She’d loved him too much to allow him to destroy her love for him.
With her last ounce of strength, she ran past him, fleeing her room without another glance back.
Cain cursed and swiveled on his heel. Seeing her with tears in her eyes felt like somebody had driven a stake through his heart. He couldn’t deny that he felt something for Faye, that despite the misgivings he had about her, he was drawn to her like to no other woman. To hear that she wanted to leave had felt like a punch in the gut.