Take a Hint, Dani Brown Page 14
He looked up. “So you don’t mind? It doesn’t bother you?”
“I don’t know,” Dani said slowly, exploring her own thoughts as she spoke. She knew she should be horrified, or at least uncomfortable—especially given her feelings on relationships. But she and Zaf weren’t actually together, so the usual, suffocating pressure that accompanied anything to do with attachment was absent. “No,” she said finally. “No, it doesn’t bother me.”
He took a step closer, then another, until his coffee-and-citrus scent flooded her space and she couldn’t meet his eyes without tipping her head back. She was used to talking with him at the security desk, while he sat down. This was . . . not the same. Or maybe it was the way he looked at her, the urgent burn of his gaze, that made everything different.
Either way, it was hot. Dani still had a few logical worries about romance novels and sweetness and expectations and blah blah blah, but right now, her vagina was pitching an intriguing idea: How about we trust the universe, stop second-guessing this, and take the fucking hint?
“The thing is,” Zaf was saying in that low, smoke-and-whiskey voice, “I had this idea. It’s a ridiculous idea, but it’s still an idea, and it—it would help me a lot. Help Tackle It a lot.”
She hovered closer to him as if hypnotized. An idea that would help his charity? His charity for children? Yes. Wonderful. Fascinating. Almost as fascinating as watching his lovely mouth move. “Tell me.”
“What if . . .” He hesitated, then pushed on, fast and firm. “What if we let people think we’re together?”
As soon as the words left his mouth, Zaf regretted asking. It was as if letting them out of his head and into the light showed him, in painful detail, how ridiculous he was being. Or maybe it was Danika’s reaction that made him wince, the way she stared at him in silence for long, long moments.
Shit.
“Never mind,” he said gruffly. “I have no idea why I said that. Obviously you wouldn’t—I mean, we aren’t—so that would be—it’s just,” he went on desperately, because he should probably explain himself, “the Post sent me this message about some kind of feel-good local feature, and they asked about Tackle It, but I don’t think they’d want to do the piece if they knew we weren’t a couple, so . . .” So he’d lost his grip on good sense, apparently.
Dani continued to stare, sinking her teeth into her lower lip. She was so close, closer than they ever got. He could see the texture of her lips, soft and plump and creased, could trace the smooth dip of her cupid’s bow with his gaze. Could drink in the velvet of her skin and the slight indent of a little scar on the bridge of her nose. He could smell her: she was warm skin and fresh fruit and the sweet smoke of blown-out birthday candles, delicious and a little confusing all at once.
But now really wasn’t the time to lose his head over Danika’s hotness. He was supposed to be concentrating on taking back the fucked-up suggestion he’d just made.
“It was a bad idea,” he said. “I know that. I’ve been reading too many romance novels. No one fakes relationships in real life.”
“Faking a relationship,” she said slowly, as if she were turning the words over on her tongue, examining them as she spoke. “I thought that’s what you meant.”
He searched her tone for amusement or annoyance or something, and came up completely blank. Studied her expression and saw nothing but that familiar thoughtfulness. He’d always liked the way she considered things, the way she learned them inside and out before expressing her thoughts, but right now it was fucking killing him. “Bad idea,” he repeated, trying to ignore the thud of his heart against his ribs. “Even if you wanted to, you probably couldn’t. You might be with someone. Or gay. Or both. Probably both. I never asked. I know you were dating that professor—”
“You know about Jo?” For the first time, Dani sounded kind of . . . off. Upset, maybe.
“I don’t know nothing about nothing.” Clearly. Zaf shoved the final bite of his sandwich in his mouth to shut himself up. In hindsight, he probably should’ve done that a good ten minutes ago.
Her lips quirked, and the tension faded from her mouth, her shoulders. “Okay. Well, I’m not gay.”
He swallowed. “Right.”
“I’m bisexual.”
“Got it.” He crushed his sandwich wrapper into a ball and reminded himself that just because Danika was into guys didn’t necessarily mean she was into security guards with the social skills of a fucking brick wall.
“And, no, I don’t have a partner,” she went on. “I don’t do the commitment thing. Ever.”
Well, shit. Zaf wasn’t exactly in a hurry to find a relationship—he had his own crap to deal with, and sometimes that crap seemed never ending. But he still valued commitment. He still envied old married couples. He still remembered the love his parents had had, the love his brother and Kiran had had, and wanted it despite the danger of loss. If commitment wasn’t for Dani, then she and Zaf weren’t for each other.
So stop thinking about her like that.
Yeah, yeah. Easier said than done. “Ever?” he repeated, trying not to sound too invested in her response. “Like . . . you don’t want to find some nice young, erm, person, and settle down and—?”
“No,” she said, looking unusually severe all of a sudden, shadows obscuring the light in her eyes.
“Are you, erm . . .” Right on time, he forgot the technical term he’d been looking for. “You don’t . . . get those . . . feelings?” he asked, then wondered why the fuck he was delving even deeper into what was clearly personal shit. Like he hadn’t talked himself into enough holes today.
But Dani didn’t seem irritated by the question—more by the topic itself. “Am I aromantic? Sadly, no. Coupledom simply doesn’t suit my constitution. Aside from which, I am entirely too busy for dating and ego-stroking and sharing my feelings and meeting people’s parents.” Her expression grew more and more disgusted with each item she listed. Zaf might have laughed, if something about her carefully disinterested tone wasn’t setting off alarm bells in his head.
“Okay,” he said slowly. “But—you know that sharing your feelings is always important, right? Whether you do the romance thing or not.”
She arched an eyebrow at him. “Is this part of your workshop? Are you going to make me throw a ball, too?”
He sighed. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t just describe rugby as throwing a ball.” He was also going to pretend that the cold weight of disappointment in his belly had nothing to do with his personal feelings for Danika Brown. He was only bothered by all this because, if she had no time for a relationship, she wouldn’t have time to fake one. It had nothing to do with her smile, or how smart she was, or the fact that she brought him coffee no matter how busy she got, or anything else like that, because if it did, he might have to admit that his crush was a little bit more than a crush.
It wasn’t, though. More, that is. Definitely just a crush.
“Okay,” he said finally. “Okay. No relationships for you. You know what? Can we just forget about—?”
“No relationships for me,” she interrupted, “which means that I’m perfectly free to fake date you.”
It was a good thing Zaf had already swallowed the last of his sandwich, because if he hadn’t, he might be choking right now. “Erm,” he wheezed. “What? Wait, seriously? Danika. Are you fucking with me? Because—”
“Yes.” She rolled her eyes.
“Yes, you’re fucking with me?”
“Yes, I’m serious. It’s a smart plan. My grandmother used fake relationships for publicity all the time.”
Was he hearing things now? “Your grandmother did what?”
Dani waved a hand. “Doesn’t matter. If this will help you shine a spotlight on your, erm . . . Tackle It situation, well”—she shot him a wry smile—“I’ll consider it my good deed of the season.” She turned slightly, her gaze focusing on something to their right. “We have company, by the way.”
It took Zaf a minute to process that, since his thoughts were still scattered by disbelief. “What?” He looked up, saw the trio of girls hovering a few meters away with their phones out, and scowled. “For fuck’s sake. I came out here to eat because everyone kept staring at my desk like I was a giraffe.”
“Do you want publicity or not?” Dani asked sternly.
No was his instinctive response. But the right kind of publicity, he reminded himself, could help in countless ways, so he’d better buck up. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.”
“Then fix your face,” she told him.
“What?” Zaf was saying that quite a lot at the moment. Understandably, he thought.
“I’m the catch of the century on paper, if not in reality,” Dani said. “No one’s going to believe you’ve been blessed with my affection if you stand there glaring at everything like the world pissed on your pillow.”