I wonder if my mom has settled down with someone or if she still needs that freedom she craved so much when I was seven. I don’t miss her. I barely remember her. But I do still wonder about her.

Reaching behind me, I mark a tally on April’s tab for her drink and grab a towel to finish drying the glasses.

But then the front door swings open and a voice booms, “Shit, it’s dead in here.”

I look up, the hair on my arms instantly standing on end. My boyfriend enters with a few of his friends in tow, but it’s the all-too-familiar voice leading the pack that makes my skin crawl.

Jay McCabe, my ex-boyfriend, walks in, slowly and taking his time, entering a room like the star quarterback he was in high school and still waiting for a fucking applause. It’s funny how he got less good looking the more I got to know him. My spine goes steel-rod straight, and awareness makes heat spread up my neck.

Cole strolls in behind with a couple guys, and Elena Barros trailing them, and I see his arched brow and the slight snarl on his face as he glances at Jay and then looks over to me.

They don’t hang out, but they will find themselves at the same parties sometimes. My guess is Jay headed here with his pack and Cole followed to make sure I’m okay.

Jay scans the room and then his eyes lock on me, a little smile curling the corner of his mouth. I immediately avert my gaze, my stomach rolling.

I try to pretend he’s of no consequence anymore, but I think he knows he won. He should be in fucking jail after what he did to me, and he’s not, because two years ago, I was scared and pathetic.

I wish someone would hurt him.

And even better if that someone turns out to be me.

Cole strolls over while his friends walk around, chatting up people they know. He swings up the partition and comes behind the bar, an apologetic look on his face as he comes up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

“What are you doing?” I ask, my fist wrapped in a towel and wiping the inside of a glass.

I feel him shrug. “Haven’t seen you. Just missed you.”

I breathe out a laugh, trying to relax my stiff body. “I’m okay. You don’t have to worry about me at work.”

He nuzzles my neck, and we both know he’s just worried about Jay being here.

I put my hand over his, feeling the small scar on his thumb, and inhale his clean scent. He looks fresh and good-looking, a lot better than he did this morning. No one can shake off a hangover like him.

“You know, it’s bad for business if her boyfriend is hanging around,” Shel warns, walking by in front of the bar and setting down a tray of glasses.

Shel fancies herself like the bar owner in the Coyote Ugly movie. ‘You are to appear available but never be available’ type thing. The problem is this is a dirt bar in a small town, so either way, the tips won’t set any records. Whether or not my boyfriend is here.

Cole snuggles my neck, and I smile, feeling safe against the wall of his body. His friends’ voices carry as the level of noise heightens in the room, and I glance up at the clock, seeing it’s nearly midnight.

And it’s Wednesday night. Cole has work in the morning.

I draw in a breath, turning my head to look up at him. “You know, we couldn’t really afford for you to lose those hours today,” I tell him.

And if he’s out tonight, chances are he’ll call in tomorrow and lose more pay.

We still have bills from the old apartment that need to be paid, and I’ll do my fair share, but he’s damn-well helping. If he misses another day, I’m going to get loud.

But he just gazes down at me thoughtfully. “I’m not stupid, babe,” he assures me. “I already know everything you want to say to me, okay?”

“And you know you’re damn lucky to still have your license, right?” I jab at him some more. A DUI on his record is the last thing we need, and he tempts fate constantly.

Especially after everything that’s happened. How can he be so careless?

I glance down at our scars again, remembering.

“What would I do without you?” he says, his breath tickling my ear.

I jerk away. “Your own laundry, probably.”

But he just laughs, tightening his hold around me. “I’m sorry I’m a loser.”

“You haven’t always been.”

He cocks an eyebrow at my dig and walks me back into the bar, a smirk playing on his lips. “I’m good at a few things, though, aren’t I?”

He tips my chin back and dives into my neck, his hot mouth kissing and biting.

Chills spread up my arms, and I gasp. “Cole…”

Ok, yes. You’re not completely terrible at everything.

He’s always been able to make me smile, and he’s a good kisser. I just wish he’d do it at home more. He hasn’t been touching me a lot lately.

And now he’s going out again tonight.

I turn my head, kissing him and hungry for the connection, but then I quickly pull away, pushing him off with a grin. “Not here,” I scold.

I twist around and clear a couple beer bottles off the bar, tossing them away.

“I am really sorry, you know?” he says in my ear. “I didn’t mean to get us kicked out of there and in this situation with my dad.”

I nod, pretty sure he means it. He’s good people, and I’ve seen him at his best. Right now, he’s in a rut, but he stood by me when no one else would, so I want to believe he’ll get on track.

I glance over at Jay, remembering how Cole was my only friend left after I broke up with that asshole. Everyone else took Jay’s side.

“So is my dad being nice to you?” he asks, pulling away and releasing me.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t he be?”

He shrugs. “Just making sure. He used to be kind of a dick back in the day. Cheated on my mom a lot, which is why we don’t get along.” He pauses and then adds, “Just to explain the tension you’re probably feeling between us.”

Cheating? Why didn’t he tell me this before? Jesus.

That doesn’t seem like Pike at all, though. He doesn’t strike me as that shallow.

But people grow up and change. Maybe he was a different guy twenty years ago.

But wait…

“I thought you said your parents broke up when you were two,” I ask.

If he was that young, how would he remember that?

“Yeah.” He starts walking back for the end of the bar. “I just know what she’s told me. It wasn’t pretty apparently, so don’t take any shit from him. He likes to push women around, which is probably why he’s still single.”

Well, his dad did look dumb-founded earlier today when he tried to tell me to stay home, and I got back in his face. I think he’s used to people following his orders. Cole’s last statement kind of rings true.

“We’re going to hit the Cue,” Cole tells me, swinging open the partition and walking through to the other side of the bar. “I’ll see you at home.”

“Don’t be too late,” I say quietly.

His shift doesn’t start until ten tomorrow morning, but I want to see him when I get home. We didn’t get much time together today.

He and his friends trickle out the front door, heading to The Cue to play some pool, but Jay cast a look back at me as he heads out the door, too, putting his arm around Shawna Abbot. His eyes drop down to my chest and then come back up, leering at me with one part desire and three parts threat.

And for two years it’s been just that. Me taking whatever gross looks he throws my way for fear of pushing him into action again. He’s left me alone, otherwise, so I just avoid him and pretend he’s not there.

Both groups leave, deciding to find their fun elsewhere, but before the front door has a chance to close, my sister saunters through, a couple of her co-workers tailing behind her. Every eye in the room turns their way, taking in the hot women in their tiny tops and high heels.

Sammy Hagar’s The Girl Gets Around plays on the juke box, and Cam heads for the bar, holding onto the edge and doing a little dance while lip syncing to me.

She’s a trip.

“All done already?” I ask over the music, glancing at the clock on the wall. “I’m not off for at least another hour.”

“That’s fine.” Cam waves me off as she reaches around and grabs the rum out of the well and the clean rocks glass in front of me. “We need to chill out before we head home to bed anyway.”

She pours one shot, replaces the bottle, and takes the soda gun, filling her glass with Diet Coke.

I pluck the scoop out of the ice bin and add a few cubes to her glass before I move down the bar, checking on the customers.

I replace Grady and Rich’s beers, get a refill for Shel’s husband playing video poker, and mix up three Cosmos for a few ladies who left their editions of Deepak Chopra’s The Gift back at their booth which they bring every week, so their husbands think they’re actually in a book club meeting.

“You want to jump behind here?” Shel shouts to Cam. “I need to restock beer.”

She shoots Shel a look, but she gets up and comes behind the bar. Shel charges down the hallway where the cooler and beer is stored.

“Empty out the tips and start the jar over,” I call out to my sister at the other end. “You don’t get a share of mine.”

She laughs, looking at me smugly as she puts her hands on her hips. I turn to mix a Screwdriver for another customer, and the next thing I know there’s a fat roll of cash in my face.

“Like I need your dimes and nickels, babe,” she replies smugly.

My eyes go wide, and my mouth hangs open as I gape at the wad. “What the hell?” I grab it out of her hand and fan the bills, seeing lots of ones but an impressive amount of tens and twenties, too.

“That’s what making your rent in one night looks like, honey.” She snatches it back out of my hand. “We had a bachelor party.”

Lots of drunk guys showering money. I watch her slide it back into her back pocket and frown at the gleam in her eye. It makes sense she makes a hell of a lot more than me. I work in a bar. She works in a club. She entertains. I pour drinks.