She’d have to be careful of sores and bruises as she wouldn’t be able to feel but she was as safe as she could be on a beast.

“Ready for your first ride?”

I’d never seen Jaz’s eyes so bright. The thought of doing something she’d given up granted a smidgen of magic on this melancholy day. “Never been more ready.”

Fighting my brotherly protectiveness, I passed her the reins. “You sure?”

Her lips pursed as she stole the leather. “Positive.”

Giving her a dressage whip, I climbed down the ramp. The whip was longer than a hunting version and meant she could encourage Claret to move without having to kick or twist.

Moving toward Wing’s stall, I stopped dead as Nila came out of Moth’s enclosure already sitting on the dapple grey.

So many times in the past fortnight I’d thought of Kes. Pictured him still living and joking and teasing. Laughing. Filling the holes of our lives with antidotes only he could.

But my brother was gone and his horse, who he so generously gave to Nila, remained.

My heart skipped a beat as Nila pulled to a stop, her eyes drowning with love. For me. Love…something I never thought I’d earn.

I marched to the side of the large dapple and grabbed her wrist. “Kiss me.”

The one sentence that started it all. The command that broke my every resolve.

Nila smiled softly. “When you ask so nicely, how can I refuse?” Bending in her saddle, I stood on my toes to reach her delicious mouth.

It wasn’t a slow kiss or even erotic. Just a quick affirmation we belonged to each other and always would.

Reluctantly, I let her go. Vaughn had managed to help Tex climb onto a large Clydesdale called Bangers and Mash, and a stable hand in turn helped V clamber on top of a newer addition to the stables called Apricot.

“Head on out, everyone. I’ll catch up.”

Jaz obeyed, flicking her whip and urging Claret forward. A procession disappeared out the barn. Tex followed gingerly, his hands tight on the reins while V chuckled, shaking his head at his father’s nervousness.

Their lack of skills was what happened when you worked in a factory all your life.

Now Nila was mine, I intended to share.

I wanted to show her Hawksridge.

I wanted to teach her how to play polo.

I wanted her to help me run the empire of diamonds and run so many facets of my world.

I also wanted to enter hers.

I wanted to travel with her on her runway shows.

I wanted to watch her sew and spend hours just sitting beside her as she crafted exquisite designs from nothing.

I want everything.

Moth snorted as Nila prevented her from following the others into the sunshine. “Do you want me to stay?”

My insides glowed with affection. “No, I’ll only be a minute.”

Swatting Moth on the rump, I sent Nila out to join our family. Retrieving my important requirement, I headed to Wings and secured the saddlebag to the pommel. “Ready, boy?”

Wings snorted, his eyes black and endless.

“I’m not, either.” I pressed my forehead against his silky neck, just like I had whenever my condition got too bad and needed space from life. “I don’t want to say goodbye but at least this way, he’s still with us.”

Swinging my leg over his immense side, I kicked him and followed the others.

“This is the place.” I pulled on my reins, bringing Wings to a stop.

For an hour, we’d trekked through woodland and glens over chases and riverbeds of Hawksridge Estate. The moment Kes's Will had been read, I’d known what his instructions would be.

We’d had such happy times here. Away from our father and obligation. Away from even our sister. Just us and the wilderness.

“It’s stunning.” Nila came up beside me. Moth’s breathing caused plumes of condensation in the chilly winter air.

Jasmine encouraged Claret to move further up the ridge, looking down the valley to where a small village rested in the distance. Hawksridge Hall couldn’t be seen from here. That was why Kes and I had liked it.

Sitting at night, wrapped up in sleeping bags and roasting marshmallows on a fire, we used to watch the twinkling lights of the village and conjure stories for what each person did.

We pretended we lived hundreds of years ago. Discussed and argued what sort of career we would’ve had. I was adamant I would’ve been a horse farrier or black-smith. There was something about hammering hot metal until it submitted that appealed to me. Kes, on the other hand, wanted to be a carpenter. Not because he liked to create things from trees but because he reckoned women preferred a man who knew how to use his wood.

I laughed under my breath, remembering his quips.

“You’re such a moron.” I fired a flaming marshmallow his way.

Kes ducked, swatting the gooey mess into the ground. His shaggy hair glistened with moonlight, while the horses munched contentedly on grass behind us. “Whatever, Jet.” Holding up his hands, he smirked. “These puppies were on Selena’s tits last week. She told me I had good hands.”

I rolled my eyes. “She’s probably never been touched by a guy before and had no one to compare you to.”

Kes scoffed. “I might only be sixteen, but I know how to please a girl.”

Sighing, I reclined in my sleeping bag, looking at the stars. “Well, she’d be lucky to have you.”

Kes shuffled closer, the crackle of the bonfire wrapping us in safety. “Same with you. You’ll meet someone who doesn’t just think of shopping and teenage girl idiocy one day. You’ll see.”