Where I Belong Page 43
I don’t want to wake up and have this not be real.
I want to stay asleep for days, months, years even. Because this dream is different. This isn’t just my typical nightly fantasy that stars Benjamin Kelly bringing me to orgasm over and over. Not that those aren’t amazing. But this dream is better. Because he stayed. He is holding me like he did the first night we were together. It feels so right. So real. And I’m terrified of opening my eyes and discovering that I’m alone. That we’re still only friends. I can feel his skin against my cheek. I can smell his scent, the strong masculine pheromones that are purely Ben. Is my mind completely f**king with me right now? I shouldn’t be able to feel or smell anything. Right? My curiosity is peaked and I have to risk the disappointment I am sure to feel when I open my eyes.
I peak one, then both open, and I almost cry at the sight of him. I don’t know if I’ve ever been this happy before. Forget sleeping forever. I never want to pry my eyes away from the man that is asleep right next to me.
He’s in my bed.
It wasn’t a dream.
His breath blows across my forehead, his legs tangling with mine under the covers. It’s real. I reach up and brush my finger down his nose, seeing his lip twitch slightly. I run my finger over the tattoo that covers his shoulder, tracing over the outline of the design. It’s beautiful. The way the colors blend together, the way it stretches down his arm and over his muscles. It’s a scene of objects and quotes, but certain ones stand out. Nolan is etched on his skin in the handwriting of a child. It’s the sweetest thing, and I trace over it several times with the tip of my finger. Ben stirs underneath me as my finger runs up and over the police shield that is on his upper arm, the words Honor The Fallen in bold ink standing out on his tanned skin. I run over the words several times as my mind drifts. How many fallen men did Ben know? He doesn’t have the safest job, and the thought of him being in danger is enough to make me want to hold on to him forever and not let him out of my sight. If something happened to him… no. I can’t go there. He stirs underneath me again and the feel of his finger brushing down my nose brings my attention up to his face.
“Hey.” I press my lips to his chest and rest my chin on my hand. His eyes seem brighter in the morning, almost as if there is a light shining behind them. His hair is a bit messy and he’s rocking the perfect amount of stubble. I could get used to morning Ben. I run my finger down his nose and he catches it, bringing it to his lips.
“I like it better when you’re not trying to sneak out on me in the morning.” He rolls over onto his side, running his hand down my arm. “You looked like you were stuck in that pretty little head. What’s going on?”
I glance from his tattoo back to him. “Have you ever been shot at?” He raises his eyebrows, seemingly unprepared for that type of question. I trace over the words underneath his shield again. “I mean, your job’s really dangerous, isn’t it?”
“Sometimes. But I’ve never been put in a situation like that. Luke got shot in the leg a couple years ago.” My eyes widen and he shakes his head at my worried stare. “The bullet barely grazed his shin, but when he tells the story, he almost died. I’m pretty sure his version has gotten him laid on more than one occasion.” His hand grips my hip tightly and he pulls me against him. His eyes darken to a devious shade as I become aware of his need for me. Very aware. “Is my girl worried about me?” he asks, rolling on top of me and settling his body between my legs.
“Yes.” I wrap my legs around his waist, lifting up my pelvis to grant him access.
He enters me slowly, groaning and dropping his forehead to mine. “Don’t be.” He kisses my lips once, then once more. “Nothing could take me away from you. You’ve got me, baby. This is where I belong. Right here.” He braces himself on his hands, thrusting into me deeply. “Christ, there’s nothing like this.” His voice is strained, his eyes focused on my face, gently caressing my features as he moves inside me.
“Ben.” I reach up and stroke his cheek. The connection we share is so strong, so undeniable. I never want to break it. He’s so familiar to me. Being with Ben feels like being home. And I can’t imagine my life without this man in it. But after the summer is over, what will we have? Will it all just be how this thing between us started out? A beautiful memory that was never meant to last? I can’t imagine how difficult leaving him is going to be, so I don’t think about it. I don’t allow unwanted thoughts to pull me out of this moment with him. I just focus on him.
“Oh God. You feel so good.” I moan, lifting my mouth to his. My legs grip him tighter; my arms holding our bodies together like a taunt rubber band. I need every part of him touching me. I can’t get close enough. I’ll never get close enough.
His hips crash against mine as his hands brace my ankles on his shoulders, tilting my pelvis to that delicious angle. I reach above me and press my hands flat against the headboard, forcing him deeper. Meeting his every thrust. That familiar pull is already building in my core and I watch mesmerized by the way the muscles of his upper body contract with each thrust.
He runs his eyes down my body and settles right where he’s entering me. “Touch yourself for me,” he demands with both his tone and his eyes that are daring me to refuse him.
I slide my hand down my body and stop when my fingertips feel the hard edge of his c**k sliding in and out of me. “Oh my God. I’m so wet.”