Perfection Page 20

Her foster parents, all one hundred and fifty-three of them, had been a different story completely. Some had been nice, some not so nice and some had acted like she wasn't there, but in each and every home she'd been a paycheck and a charity case, nothing more. Not in one single home had she been treated or expected to act like one of the family.

There were always separate rules for her and the other foster kids in each home and different expectations. She was expected to do as she was told and keep her mouth shut when something happened that she didn't like. They learned quickly that they couldn't push her around just because no one cared about her.

She knew other kids kept their mouths shut, too afraid to upset their foster parents and be shipped off to a new home, but that wasn't her. The inconvenience of packing up her small duffle bag and going to a new home, dealing with new foster parents, and learning new rules hadn't been enough for her to keep her mouth shut. If they treated her like crap she spoke up, plain and simple. She never acted like a spoiled little brat who liked to bitch and whine about everything, but when she had foster parents who wouldn't feed her unless she worked for it or liked to hit her or some of the smaller kids, she spoke up, loudly.

Instead of coming to her aide and reassuring her that it would never happen again a few of her social workers actually told her to learn to shut her mouth, telling her it wasn't so bad and that if she wanted a roof over her head and food in her stomach that she needed to learn keep her mouth closed. Sometimes she followed that little tidbit of crappy advice and kept her mouth shut. She might have been a kid, but she hadn't been stupid. She knew no one was ever going to rescue her and love her and that she was damn lucky not to have to live on the street, but sometimes the way her foster parents treated her was too much and she couldn't keep her mouth shut no matter how much she wanted to.

It wasn't until she was fifteen and found herself living in an abandoned car that she realized that sometimes it was better to keep her big mouth shut, especially if she was going to make a life for herself. Although she did her best to curb her big mouth sometimes it still got her in trouble and she found herself in a sticky situation a time or two.

When she landed an entry level job with The N.W. Corporation a few years ago she'd forced herself to keep her mouth shut, knowing she didn't want to mess up the opportunity to make something out of her life. As difficult as it had been she learned to keep her mouth shut, mostly, until she barely recognized the person she'd become where being screwed over didn't bother her because she truly believed she'd move up in the company and all the nonsense they put her through would be worth it.

Had she really been that delusional?

Apparently she had, because she allowed them to push her around until she simply hadn't cared anymore. Even though it had only been a few months since she worked in that hell hole she still couldn't believe she let them treat her that way or worse that she let the job become her life. She'd lost touch with the few friends she had and stopped dating, not that she'd done much of that in the past, but at least a decent amount of sex might have made her life more tolerable.

She really missed sex, she thought with a sigh.

But if all went well tonight she wouldn't be missing it for much longer. Not that she'd ever been a tramp. She hadn't. She just had a healthy appetite for sex for a twenty-nine year old woman who hadn't had sex in five years.

She also missed the intimacy of being close to another human being. She missed lazy Sundays in bed, fighting over the remote, snuggling to stay warm and the way she felt when a man made love to her, not alone.

"No f**king way," Trevor said as he stepped out of his apartment and caught sight of the leash.

"This is just getting sad," she said, sighing. "It's just a leash, a cute leash, but a leash all the same."

"If it's just a leash then why aren't you using the black one?" Trevor demanded, crossing his arms over his chest as he continued to glare at the offending leash.

"Because it's cute. Did I not just cover that?" she asked, knowing she was taunting him and god help her she loved it.

"Cute?" he asked, sounding dumbfounded.

"Uh huh," she agreed absently, walking, more like being dragged to the front door by Toby. As she opened the door she decided to taunt him just a little more. Just as she stepped through the door she added, "Cute just like my Red Sox tee shirt," she said, squealing, whether it was from him lunging for her or Toby taking off at a full run and dragging her she wasn't sure. The only thing she knew was she couldn't stop laughing as Trevor's hand missed her bottom by a mile and he promised she wouldn't be able to sit for a week after he got his hands on her.

She knew it probably wasn't the smartest thing to taunt the man, but she just couldn't help herself. He was so damn entertaining.

*********

"Are you done yet?" Trevor demanded, again, as he paced the small confines of his bathroom.

"No, and go away this is getting kind of creepy!" Zoe yelled over the sound of running water.

"If you moved your ass so I could take a shower I wouldn't be bothering you, now would I?" he snapped, feeling edgy.

"Jeez someone's bitchy," Zoe muttered loud enough, no doubt on purpose, for him to hear.

"I'm not bitchy!" But he was. He really was and it was all because he was torturing himself by pacing the bathroom like an idiot while his body's odd little obsession was only a few feet away naked, wet, and sudsy. Granted there was a wall between them, but the way he was feeling right now it didn't matter.

He didn't like the way she made him feel or the way his body ached when she was near. He sure as hell didn't want to feel this way about her. She wasn't his type and he had absolutely no plans on changing his ways now, especially for her.

When he took a woman out, he liked showing her off, knowing that every man took one look at the woman on his arm and envied him. If he ever took a woman like Zoe out they'd wonder what the hell was wrong with him and he wouldn't be able to blame them because there was nothing perfect about Zoe and he couldn't accept anything less. He would never be looked down on with pity ever again or have anyone think that he couldn't do better.

"Go away!" Zoe said.

"Hurry the hell up!" he snapped. "I have plans tonight."

"So do I!" she shot back, making him wonder what plans she had. As far as he knew she never went out at night unless she was running an errand or hitting the pool at the gym. She was a bit of a homebody, but he didn't think she was going to the gym tonight since she didn't usually shower beforehand.

"Where the hell are you going?" he demanded, giving up his pacing to lean back against the sink counter.

"Out."

He snorted. "Out where?"

"Just out," she answered hesitantly a moment later.

"Are we still on for the book tonight?" he asked even though he knew there was a good chance, god willing, that he wouldn't be around for that tonight. Then again if it was a quick lay he might be able to get back here in time.

"I, uh," he could just make out the sound of her clearing her throat, "might not be alone tonight," she said, stunning the shit out of him.

"You have a date?" he asked in a disbelieving tone that probably sounded a bit insulting.

"I could have a date!" she argued.

"But do you?" he asked, noting that she hadn't really answered.

"The shower's all yours," she said brightly, obviously trying to change the subject, which at the moment was fine with him. She could go out with whomever she wanted. He didn't care. They weren't really friends. She was his employee and tenant and nothing more.

Okay, so she also read to him at night and put a smile on his face first thing in the morning and the last thing at night, but she could still do that if she was seeing someone else. It would probably also help get his head straight if he knew she was off limits since he didn't poach. Well, he did, but he wouldn't try to steal her since she really wasn't his type and sooner or later his body would remember that.

Of course if she started to date he would really have to look into having the walls reinsulated. There was no way he wanted to hear her f**king some other guy. Again, not that he cared, but that didn't mean he wanted to wake up in the middle of the night to hear her scream some other guy's name. He wasn't a masochist after all.