Once again I was setting my hopes up for nothing, longing for a relationship that could never be. His inevitable departure date was still looming.

“Listen, Ryan, I have to go. Marie is all by herself behind the bar and we’re kind of busy. It was nice talking to you.” I had the sudden urge to flee.

“Okay. Um, I guess I’ll talk to you later then.”

I don’t think I even said goodbye. I shoved my phone into the front pocket of my jeans and hurried back behind the bar. The sooner I could get distracted the better. I kept slipping up over and over again, letting my guard down with him and allowing myself to swim in dangerous waters.

A few minutes passed and my cell phone buzzed again. I opened the picture Ryan sent; he had a funny expression on his face while pointing to his fake cut lip. I couldn’t help but laugh.

I tried to convince myself that I wouldn’t get hurt if I kept this thing with him strictly platonic, but to do so I’d have to make sure that I didn’t let him touch me anymore. No more holding hands, or running my fingers through his soft hair, staring into his eyes. Hugging… that was dangerous too.

Anything that involved physical contact must be off-limits. I even tried to force myself to have a dream where we were only friends, playing a game of softball with us on the Mitchell’s Pub team, but even my subconscious betrayed me.

The following day I tried to banish the lingering memories of the hot and steamy dream I did have about him, where I tore the baseball uniform off his body… “Hey baby!” Marie greeted me as she started her shift Thursday night.

I dumped a new bucket of ice in the bin, thinking I should dump an entire bucket down my shirt too. “Hey. I have some applicants coming in today. I’d like you to interview them too, since we both have to get along with whomever I hire.”

“Sure. No problem,” she said as she tucked her bar rag in her back pocket. “Did you hear from Mr. Wonderful?”

I smiled. “He called me three times today.”

“Three?” She looked surprised.

“He wasn’t in a lot of scenes, so he was bored,” I muttered privately.

“Bored? Yeah right! He’s definitely crazy about you,” Marie insisted.

Marie and I were handling a decent sized crowd when our second applicant came into the bar. He was twenty-something, dressed like a normal human being, and he was early. Marie spent about twenty minutes with him before she returned to the bar.

“I like this one,” she murmured to me in passing.

The young man’s name was Cory. He was twenty-three, tall and beefy with a short haircut and a dark brown goatee. He was taking business and computer courses at the local community college and needed rent money.

Halfway through the interview Ryan called me again. I looked at the time; he was on his dinner break.

“Hi, um, can I call you back?” I answered quickly. “I’m interviewing someone right now. I’ll call you in a few minutes, okay?”

“No, that’s okay. I have to get back on set in ten minutes and then I’m going out to eat with some of the cast. I just thought of something I wanted to tell you. I’ll call you when I get to the hotel later,” Ryan rambled and then hung up.

“Sorry about that,” I apologized to Cory. Knowing Ryan, he just wanted to talk.

I escorted Cory out to the bar, and instead of leaving, he sat down on a barstool. I liked the fact that he wanted to check out the atmosphere of the bar. It showed he was interested in working here.

“I like him too,” I said to Marie. “If his references check out, maybe we can give him a trial run this weekend?”

“Yeah, sure.” She nodded. “He knows his drinks and he seems like a nice guy. Something for all the females to look at?” she added. “Besides, two bitches behind the bar are enough.”

Chapter 9 - Gestures

I spent an hour Friday afternoon calling Cory’s references, even though I was pretty decided that I was going to hire him. Cory was willing to start tonight and that sounded perfect to me. I was wondering if Ryan was going to just show up again; surely we would get slammed with customers if he did that.

I was tempted to call Ryan since he didn’t call me back last night like he said he would. I wondered if he was waiting for me to call him - if it was a test. It didn’t matter; I still wasn’t going to sway from my rule not to chase him.

I had already given up hope hearing from Ryan when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I looked at the time; it was ten thirty.

“Marie, I’ll be right back,” I said as I ran for my stairwell.

“Hi,” I answered, very much knowing whose voice was going to respond.

“Hi – how are you?” Ryan asked.

“I’m great! How are you?” I was definitely happy to hear from him.

“I’m good. I just left dinner. I really want to see you tonight.”

“I really want to see you too.” Damn, another slip.

“Good!” he said happily.

“Are you going to walk through my front door in two minutes?” I chuckled, attempting to cover up my mistake.

“Mike, stop right here. I’ll see you tomorrow.” It sounded like he had the phone away from his face, and then I heard a car door slam. I could hear his breathing rate pick up.

“Why does it sound like you’re running?” I asked.

“Because I’m halfway down your alley,” he breathed back.

I ran to the back door.

A few moments later a dark cloaked figure slipped through my back door. The hood of his jacket was pulled way up to hide his face and he had his large messenger bag slung over his shoulder. His eyes met mine and a huge smile appeared on his face.

“Hey you,” Ryan greeted me, slipping his hand through his hair to knock his hood back. The lights in the kitchen made the reddish tinge in his dirty blond hair even more noticeable.

“Hey back,” I said, matching his beaming smile with my own as he wrapped his arms around my shoulders to give me a quick hug.

“Brrr, it’s cold out there.” Ryan shivered slightly and stepped back to release me. “Um... so, how are you?” His eyebrows narrowed.

“I’m good!” I was smiling so hard my face started to hurt. He gave me a little wink. So much for not letting him hug me.

“You look… great!” he complimented. He ran his eyes down my body; his fingers touched the edge of my shirt.

His eyes seemed to linger until the music playing in the pub distracted him.