“It’s pretty late,” I whispered, not knowing how to convey my thoughts. I didn’t want him to run anywhere.

We gazed at each other for a moment; I watched his mouth curl down in disappointment. I, too, felt the same sadness thinking about him leaving. There was only one answer. “Stay,” I whispered.

“Do you have an extra pillow?” His eyes flashed down the hallway to the living room. I guess he was offering to sleep on the couch.

We stood there in the hallway leaning on opposing walls in silence, just staring at each other, waiting and gauging each other’s reaction. He was trying to be a gentleman and not force his way into my bedroom without an invitation, but in my mind, the couch in the front room was too far of a distance between us. Things would be a lot different in my bedroom tonight from how they were last night, and we both knew it. The door to physical contact and sexual intimacy had been opened.

I held out my hand, craving for him to hold me in his arms like he did this morning. Ryan gently smiled and placed just the tips of his fingers on mine. I curled his fingers into the palm of my hand and led him into my dark bedroom.

I turned on the little lamp that sits on my dresser to softly illuminate the bedroom and quickly slipped into the bathroom to change. Ryan waited for me to return. He stood there, staring at me as he peeled his shirt off over his head. His chest and arms were strong and defined, and the light from the lamp made his skin glow.

I watched him open his jeans and take them off his long legs. He tried to lay his pants on my bedroom chair but he missed; some loose change made ting sounds on the wooden floor when it fell out of his pockets. He quickly stripped his socks off and tossed them one by one to the floor.

Ryan slid into bed and adjusted the pillows until he was comfortable. We inched closer to each other and I hesitantly rested my hand on his bare chest. I wanted to let my fingers roam free but my hand was inconveniently frozen in place.

He slid down the bed until our eyes were at the same level. We gazed into each other’s eyes and he gently stroked my cheek; those unspoken words of the possibilities of what could happen next flowed between us.

His fingertips guided my face to his as he softly kissed my lips. His touch was so gentle it made me smile.

Slowly, sensually, our hands touched each other’s bodies. Our fingertips lightly trailed over each other’s skin, taking the liberty to explore uncharted territory.

His hand pressed in the small of my back as he pulled me closer; his kisses completely aroused my body. Softly he bit and sucked my bottom lip into his mouth and I moaned from the pleasure.

I ran my hand down his back, pressing my fingertips into his skin to massage his muscular frame. I had wanted to feel his body for so long now and I was finally getting my wish.

His hand gripped my hip in response, sending another shockwave through my veins. I could feel his fingers tense and press into my hipbone as I ran my tongue over his luscious lips.

My fingers trailed down his chest to his stomach; his body quivered lightly under my touch. I could feel that he was completely aroused.

I was getting too carried away in the moment; a few minutes more of this and there’d be no turning back. Doubt, fear, crept into my thoughts, quelling ecstasy and desire. I placed my flat hand on his chest and lightly pushed back away from him; I needed a moment to catch my breath. I rubbed my eyes as the sensible person who lives in my brain spoke up.

“Taryn, I understand. I want you so bad, but I don’t want to do anything you’re not ready to do,” Ryan whispered.

I had no will left. My body craved to feel him - all of him. My thoughts wrestled with that desire as all the warning bells went off in my head.

He wrapped his fingers around my wrist and moved my hand away from my eyes. “Talk to me. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

“I’m worried.” I shrugged, trying like hell not to appear like an immature, neurotic mess. My words came out in a whisper.

“What are you worried about?”

I took a deep breath and sighed.

“I know you’re not…” I murmured, stopping myself. “I don’t do casual very well. Sex for me involves emotions and in reality… you’re not going to be here for much longer.” The words were difficult to say.

“Look at me. Please... look in my eyes,” he softly pleaded.

I turned to gaze back at him. His eyes were captivating.

“If you haven’t noticed, I’m pretty crazy about you. You’re all I think about,” he said as he brushed his fingertips on my cheek. “You’re not the only one making an emotional investment here.

“I know why you’re worried, Taryn.” He took in a deep breath. “I’m not here to use you or to hurt you. You have to understand - it’s not easy for me to have any kind of relationship, despite what people think. It’s difficult for me to keep a private life or to trust anyone. One of my old girlfriends sold our relationship to the tabloids for money.”

He looked away, wincing from the unpleasant memory. “After that, well, let’s just say it’s been a while since I’ve been this emotionally close with anyone.”

He looked back into my eyes. “Believe me when I say that random one-nighters are not my style. That’s all I need, for stuff like that to be in print too.”“

I guess we’re two kindred spirits then,” I said.

“What do you mean?” He looked at me for an explanation.

“You don’t trust women and I don’t trust men.”

“Huh,” he breathed out. “So why don’t you trust men?”

“I was… involved with someone a few months ago, too,” I said hesitantly. I didn’t want to accidentally say the scary word “engaged” out loud fearing that Ryan might run if he thinks I only have marriage on the brain.

“Let’s just say that one woman wasn’t enough for him.” I pursed my lips from the thought. “Anyway, sounds like we’ve both had our fair share of pain to deal with.”

“Yeah, but the difference is that your heartaches aren’t front-page news printed on the cover of millions of magazines,” he huffed as he ran his fingers back through his hair. “And you don’t need a Publicist when you break up with someone.”

I sat up on my elbow and rested my hand on his chest. “Ryan, I care about you, a lot. I guess that’s why I’m hesitant to jump into this – because we both need to be able to trust each other. But I promise, no matter what happens between us, I will never, ever, betray you.”