***

Sienna and I spent the entire day watching bands and eating food on sticks, some of which I wasn’t even sure what it was. Some of the day we spent with Kyle and Justin and the other musicians on the tour, but it was difficult to move through the festival with so many girls stopping Kyle and Justin for autographs and pictures. More than a few lifted their shirts to reveal bare skin and requested that they each sign a breast, which the guys happily obliged. The day was a lot of fun, although I did notice that Justin kept his distance from me most of the day.

After a few hours of constant stopping for fans with Double Strife, Sienna and I decided to ditch them. With the size of the crowd of women circling them, anxious for whatever attention they could get, I doubted they would even notice for a few hours.

The rest of the afternoon Sienna and I watched bands and danced together and I couldn’t have asked for a better, more laid-back day — except, of course, if at the end of it I was going home to Jack. We met back up with the guys in time for the nude run and I found it amusing how many more of the guys from our tour had decided to join in on the fun after finding out Sienna was going to participate. Sienna, of course, would be the only woman participating from our tour group, but that didn’t seem to bother her at all.

Justin and I watched the nude run together, both laughing hysterically as drunk people ran around, falling often. The run had become a greater spectacle than usual, as the grounds were muddy from a heavy rain the night before, making the grassy campsite area slippery and muddy. The messy conditions seemed to have not mixed well with the inebriated campers, making most participants appear as if they had been mud-wrestling.

Although we didn’t talk much, I was glad that Justin and I got to spend a little time together having lighthearted fun. There had definitely been a tension between us the last week and people on the tour had been starting to notice.

After the nude run festivities wrapped up, most of our group decided to spend the evening at the beer tent. I politely declined, as my throat had become scratchy and I wasn’t sure if it was allergies or I had begun to come down with a cold. Considering I was being paid to sing, I thought it best to forego the evening festivities and call it an early night. I was excited to play the next day and wanted everything to be perfect.

Back on the tour bus I made some eucalyptus tea and settled in for the night. The camping area was loud outside, but a little soft music made it easy to forget that there was a giant party going on around me. I called Jack and filled him in on the day’s antics and he told me about his day. He mentioned that he had a board meeting in the morning and his tone changed as he told me about it. I knew that a board meeting meant being in the same room as his father, something that Jack unequivocally avoided at all costs.

He planned to do a ten mile run in the morning to work off some of the stress before having to spend hours so close to his father. He had basically disowned his father years ago when his mother was dying of cancer and his father had traipsed around town with a bevy of mistresses half his age instead of taking care of his ailing wife. Since then, he tolerated his father only when absolutely necessary and restricted any interactions to solely business. Things had got progressively worse in the last few months, after Jack’s father had interfered in mine and Jack’s lives. I wanted to ask if anything new had happened to cause the current animosity in his voice, but something told me that it was best left for another time, perhaps when we were in person.

We talked on the phone for over an hour, and as we were beginning to make plans to talk the next day, there was a knock at the bus door. I stayed on the phone with Jack as I unlocked it, expecting to find a drunk Sienna on the other side. But instead it was Justin. Justin didn’t speak, he stood outside and waited for me to invite him in. I told Jack that I would call him the next day because the tour manager had come to go over the plans, and we both said goodnight. I hated to lie to Jack, but I knew how he felt about Justin and he had enough on his mind, having to deal with his father and the board meeting in the morning.

Justin waited outside the door to the bus, with me holding it open, until I had hung up the phone.

“Can I come in, Syd?”

I was leery at first, but then stepped aside while still holding the door, silently accepting his request. I knew Jack wouldn’t like me spending time alone with Justin, but I figured it might be best to clear the tension between us. I thought about my promise to Jack not to have men in my room, and justified to myself that I wasn’t breaking my promise as long as we stayed in the common area of the bus. I couldn’t imagine that it would be possible to spend three more months on tour with Justin and not sit in the front of the bus together at some point. It was best to clear the air and move forward with less tension between us.

Justin sat down and we both began to speak at the same time. We both laughed, almost nervously, and an awkward silence followed.

“You first,” he said.

“I was just going to ask why you weren’t out at the beer tent partying with the others.”

“Oh. The beer party turned into an autograph signing party so I got out at the first lull in the line.”

I smiled. “Part of the cost of your fame.”

“I guess so.” Justin ran his fingers through his hair. His body language let on that the constant attention actually bothered him more than he let on.

“What were you going to say, Justin?”

Justin pushed his hands into his pocket and looked down, playing with a small spot on the rug at his feet. His movement reminded me of a small child who was about to confess something to his mother, but was nervous of her reaction. “I was going to apologize for acting like a jackass lately.” He looked up at me with a hesitant shy smile. It was the first glimpse of the old Justin that I’d known.

“You have been a bit of a jackass.” I smiled and nudged my shoulder in to his in a friendly gesture meant to ease the apprehension of our conversation.

Justin responded with laughter in his voice. “I knew you wouldn’t let me off the hook that easy.”

I laughed, feeling some of the tension between us release at our friendly exchange. “Want me to kick your ass at Rock Band, friend?”

Justin’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and his cocky dimpled smile returned. “Bring it on, blondie.”

We played Rock Band on the flat screen in the front of the bus, while lounging at opposite ends of the couch for more than two hours. I lost track of the wins and losses, but by the time Sienna came stumbling in I was pretty sure I had lost.