My decision made, I snuck a sideways glance at Ethan, and stood up to smooth my dress. “Dillon, I’d love to dance with you.”

Dillon’s skills were such that he made me look good out there. And it was fun. When he spun me, my skirt flared out in a gauzy wave and I loved it. I felt pretty and desirable for the first time today instead of the awkward preggo bridesmaid who watched everyone else having fun while I sat around on my widening ass.

When the song changed to Bloodstream by Stateless, I thanked Dillon for keeping me company, and looked around for Ethan. It was one of my favorite songs and reminded me so much of how Ethan was with me. I think I might have inhaled you—I can feel you behind my eyes—You’ve gotten into my bloodstream—I can feel you flowing in me. Slow dancing to that particular song with anyone other than my man, was out of the question. I didn’t even see him dancing with Gwen anymore. Where in the hell had he gone? My husband should be dancing with me at this wedding. Not some random woman who was thin and beautiful… My body is changing very fast.

Quite frankly, I was irritated. He’d basically abandoned me to drink at the bar with the guys, and then went off to dance with another woman. I didn’t like feeling this way, and for the first time since I’d known Ethan, I could actually imagine he was avoiding me. But why? This morning he’d been fine, and later before the ceremony he’d come to check on me, worried about my headache. My caring, attentive man, as he always was with me. But then, after the ceremony moved onto the reception, he seemed distant, and went off with Ivan and Elaina’s brother, Ian, for some bromance time I suppose. Was it possible all the wedding hearts and love blossoms were getting to him?

Well, he was the one who’d insisted on marrying, I reminded myself. I never demanded a ring. All Ethan—all the way, with the—let’s-get-married-right-now—ridiculousness. If he was having second thoughts about his new ball-n-chain, then he was just a little goddamn late on figuring it out.

Ethan’s game at the moment? Full-blown ass**lery to the millionth power. And a bitter disappointment for his pregnant and crabby wife.

I kissed the bride and groom, made an excuse to Gaby and Ben about my headache, and figured I’d see the rest of the crowd tomorrow at the brunch. Right now, I was ready for my head to meet my pillow. Growing a tiny human made me require a ton more sleep than usual. As I steered for the staircase, I treated myself to a mini-tantrum—inside my head, of course—at how un-romantic this evening had been for me. Talk about a buzz-kill.

My decision in favor of sleep, over searching out wherever Ethan had gotten lost was really very easy for me. Because it’d felt like I’d been on my own all night, anyway. When I got up to our room, I changed into a warm cozy nightgown and settled into the lonely bed, feeling bereft, wondering when he would stumble up to join me. But I did know he would make it eventually.

That was the thing with us. I trusted Ethan even though he was being an ass. He knew the lay of the land with me. Honesty and trust were required, or there was nothing holding us together.

Good sex wasn’t love.

For me, honest devotion and loyalty was love.

If Ethan ever cheated on me I would walk out his door and never look back. I knew it. He knew it.

CHAPTER 11

I gave her half an hour before following her up the stairs. I wanted to wait longer so the alcohol buzz would dull my edge a bit more, making me safer to be around. But I couldn’t stand being away from her another moment. I needed my tranquillizer. Neil had said it to me before. Brynne is your cure. Nothing could bring me out of my hell when I felt like this…except her.

I breathed easier knowing I wouldn’t have to say much. Her new rule of letting me alone to house my demons in solitude helped a great deal. Everything about Brynne helped me.

When I came into the room it was dark and she was sleeping just as I’d hoped. I ditched the tux and slipped under the sheets, settling in behind her. The first inhale of her comforting scent went up my nose and straight to my brain, immediately soothing, giving me hope to make the ugliness fade away. Best I’d felt all night, the instant I notched into the back of her neck and buried my nose in her hair.

Brynne was so generous with herself to me, she never minded when I woke her up and wanted to f**k.

I needed to f**k right now.

Drown out the guilt.

WHEN I moved down the bed and pulled back the blankets, I found her swathed in some kind of nightgown that covered her up from head to toe, and of a style maybe worn by my grandmother…when she was well into her eighties. Ugly thing was a dustbin candidate for sure. Hiding all that beauty away from my eyes only frustrated me. Being half pissed didn’t help my judgment probably, but it didn’t stop me. I found the place where it buttoned down to about mid chest on her, dug my fingers in between the buttons, and split that f**kin’ rag right in two, all the way down to the hem. Her naked tits came into view first, and then the rest of her. I felt instantly better. My c**k was bone-fucking hard.

She woke with a gasp and a scream.

“Shhhh.” I clamped a hand over her mouth and my lips at her jaw. I didn’t want visitors doing the ol’ “is everything all right in there?” routine at this house party, since the place was crammed to the brim with them. Her eyes flared wide, and I sense she was not happy about what I’d just done, but again, that did not deter me. “It’s just me getting rid of that ugly nightgown for you. I loathed it.” I took my hand away and covered her lips with my mouth instead. She mumbled under my kisses at first, and tensed beneath me, but once she got a feel of my tongue inside her, she responded beautifully, softening under my body, letting me play my games, and take her. “I despised that gown, but I love you.” I kissed down her throat to the hollow of her neck, onward over her sternum and then to right between her br**sts. I flicked my tongue out and dragged it over to a nipple. She arched her back to bring herself closer. I swirled over her budded, pink nipple ’round and ’round until she was practically writhing beneath me.

“That’s better,” I told her. “I have to see my beautiful wife…every inch of you.”

“Ethan?”

“Shhhh, baby,” I soothed, “just feel what I’m going to give you.”

I kissed my way down, giving a caress over her stomach as I went lower. Spreading her inner thighs firmly, I opened her up and enjoyed the magnificent view. She took my breath away, and she always had. Her pu**y… No words for it. I inhaled, getting drunk on her intoxicating scent. Unique to Brynne, and utterly delectable, triggering my insta-need to have her.