Before Josiah could say anything, Mateo disappeared. He closed his eyes and steadied his breathing. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. He would do it for Mateo. He wouldn’t make this harder on Teo than it already was. He’d prove to Mateo he was right when he said they could both take care of each other, not just Teo taking care of him.

So he did. He walked around all day, pretending like he belonged here. He stayed off the main paths, trying to steer clear of cops. Every so often he made his way back to the tree where Mateo had left him. It was dusk when he found his boyfriend there.

“Holy fuck, I’ve been freaking the hell out.” Mateo pulled him into a hug.

“You told me to walk around. That’s what I was doing. You worry like you’re a girl or something.”

Mateo laughed. It was the first time since they’d been here that he’d seen Mateo laugh.

“Come on. I got us a place to stay.” He nodded his head in the other direction and started walking.

Josiah’s heart soared. “What? Where? Like, a real place?”

“Don’t get too excited.” Mateo shook his head. “It’s a piece of shit. One room and that’s all. A downstairs apartment in a shitty neighborhood from the kinda guy who doesn’t care that I don’t have a real job and who will break my neck if I don’t have rent.”

Josiah’s feet rooted to the ground. “Umm...what?”

“That’s all we can do right now, Jay. I told you that. I need somewhere to stay where they won’t think twice about seeing you. Where they’re not gonna care if they do find out you’re a runaway. I can’t get a real job because if I do, they’ll know where I am. They have to be looking for me, knowing you’re with me.”

This time it was Josiah who almost vomited. He hadn’t thought about all that. The kind of trouble Mateo could maybe get into because of him.

“I don’t want you sleepin’ on the streets anymore. It’ll be okay. Trust me.” He started walking again, giving Josiah no choice but to do the same.

“What about rent? How are we going to pay?”

“First month’s taken care of. Once I know you’re safe there, I’ll go out and find a way to get us some more money.”

Fear clogged Josiah’s throat. He didn’t want to ask how Mateo got the money for this month, or what he’d be doing to get the rest of it. Instead, he followed Mateo. Together. They were together. That’s all that mattered.

Chapter Sixteen

October

Mateo

Nothing he did for money was on the up and up. Mateo did the dirty work for the guy they got the apartment from and for another street player he found. Mostly drugs and weapons. Even though he hated it, all he had to do was sell. He didn’t come home to Josiah with blood on his hands, and the money took care of them. That’s all that mattered to Mateo.

Months passed by. He felt like shit because Josiah didn’t get out a whole lot. He couldn’t do the kind of work Mateo did, but he couldn’t get a real job, either. Not being a seventeen-year-old runaway.

He’d get excited when he found some crazy piece of furniture, or something for their apartment at this hole-in-the-wall used store. And they bought a chessboard, too, and played every night.

Things were hard, and a day didn’t go by that he hated letting Josiah live this way...but they were happy, too. They were together, and Josiah smiled a lot, which often made Teo do the same. How could he not be happy when he had Josiah with him? Josiah had said it before, and even though he’d argued, he agreed: As long as they were together, things were okay.

At about nine o’clock, after one of the longest days of his life, Mateo unlocked the door to their apartment and went inside. The couch bed, which was what they slept on, had already been pulled out. The chessboard sat in the middle of it, but Josiah was nowhere in sight.

“Jay?” Mateo called, realizing their whole apartment smelled like a coffee shop.

“Hey!” Josiah pushed the bathroom door open and came out. “Check this out.” He had this huge ass smile on his face that Mateo couldn’t help but return.

Teo followed him to the kitchen.

“It’s an espresso machine. I got it at that secondhand store down the street. I made us some.”

Mateo bit back his words. It made him nervous when Josiah went out too much on his own, but he also couldn’t expect him to stay locked up in their dingy apartment all day, either. “Smells good. I drink that shit and I’m gonna be up all night, though.”

“So?” Josiah shrugged. “I’m making it, so you have to drink it.” His eyes were firmly planted on Mateo. They were most of the time now. They warmed his skin. Made him forget about all the bad shit because he had Josiah. He never thought he’d be so lucky.