Under My Skin Page 57


A horrible greasy feeling swirls in my stomach, because this is bad—really bad. This isn’t leaked emails or embarrassing photos or foolish rumors about government weapons. This is vandalism. This is real, honest-to-goodness sabotage.

And I’m taking it very, very personally.

“We need to see the extent of the damage,” I say. “Can we still use the dock in that condition? Or can you get close enough to anchor and we can wade in?”

“No.” Jackson’s voice is firm. “We need to get Ryan and a team here. I don’t want to run the risk of contaminating the scene. And there’s fuel everywhere. I don’t want you out there until we know it’s safe.”

I start to argue that I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself, but he’s right and so I say nothing. There’s no cell service on the island yet, but the boat has a complete satellite communication system, and the phone starts to ring even as I am running below deck to get it.

I hurry to answer it, not surprised to find that the caller is Ryan.

“You saw the security feed?” I demand. “Could you see who did it?”

“Not exactly,” he says, which makes very little sense. Clearly he knows what I’m talking about, but how would he without seeing the feed?

“I’ll explain when we get there,” he says, anticipating my question. “Damien and I will be there in forty-five minutes, tops. We’re coming by boat with a full team following about twenty minutes behind. And, Syl,” he adds, “stay off the island.”

I hurry back to the deck, mentally running through the to-do list that is now growing in my head. The clean-up, the investigation, and—oh, hell—the press.

My mind is swimming with details as I relay Ryan’s call to Jackson, who doesn’t have any better idea than I do as to how Ryan could know about the island.

From what I can tell, he’s been pacing the deck the entire time I was gone, but he’d stopped the moment I returned. Now he reaches for me, holding me firmly by the shoulders as he studies my face. “Are you okay?”

I understand what he’s asking, and I nod. “I’m fine. Pissed, but fine.” I offer him a smile. “It’s work,” I say, and with Jackson I know I don’t have to say any more, because it’s the same for him, and always has been. Work is our escape. Our safe place. The thing that drives us and centers us. Trouble at work is an irritation, and it might piss the hell out of me, but it won’t cripple me.

It’s the personal shit that can destroy me. Moments like last night that can conjure the nightmares and the fears and the need to just dig deep and hide inside myself somewhere.

At least, it used to have the power to destroy me. Now, I have Jackson and the strength he’s helped me find.

My lover, my friend, my protector.

I slide into his arms, then tilt my head back for a kiss. “Come on,” I say. “Let’s go make a list of everything we need to check once Ryan clears us to go on the island.”

In his office, he works at his computer and I pace behind him as I try to cover every contingency.

I’m mentally calculating what the cost of overtime for a cleanup crew is going to do to my budget when the phone rings again. I grab it up. “What’s your ETA?”

“Sylvia?” It’s not Ryan, it’s a woman. And it takes me a moment to realize it’s Harriet Frederick.

“Ms. Frederick.” My throat has closed up, and it’s hard for me to push her name out. “I . . .”

I give up. I have no idea what to say.

“May I speak to Jackson?” Her words are soft, as if she understands that a normal tone might actually hurt me.

He’s already at my side, having risen at the sound of her name. I hand him the phone, feeling a little numb, then immediately hug myself.

Jackson stays at my side. “I’m here, Harriet. What’s going on?”

I struggle to hear the conversation, wishing that Jackson would put it on speaker but knowing that he can’t because that could mess up the attorney-client privilege. So I try to interpret Jackson’s facial expressions.

Considering he’s standing as still as a statue, I’m not having much luck.

After a moment, he says, “I see. And worst case, when are we looking at?”

Worst case.

Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.

I don’t bother with a chair. I just drop down and sit on the floor.

“All right,” he says. “Thanks for calling.” He laughs. “No, I won’t. It’s tempting. But no.”