“When I started working on this case, ladies and gentlemen, I didn’t see myself as a racist. Now I realize I am. Not because I hate people of different races but because—intentionally or unintentionally—I’ve gotten a boost from the color of my skin, just like Ruth Jefferson suffered a setback because of hers.”

Odette is sitting with her head bowed at the prosecution table. I can’t tell if she is delighted that I am building my own coffin out of words or if she is simply stunned that I have the balls to antagonize the jury at this late stage of the game. “There is a difference between active and passive racism. It’s kind of like when you get on the moving walkway at the airport. If you walk down it, you’re going to get to the other end faster than if you just stand still. But you’re ultimately going to wind up in the same spot. Active racism is having a swastika tattoo on your head. Active racism is telling a nurse supervisor that an African American nurse can’t touch your baby. It’s snickering at a black joke. But passive racism? It’s noticing there’s only one person of color in your office and not asking your boss why. It’s reading your kid’s fourth-grade curriculum and seeing that the only black history covered is slavery, and not questioning why. It’s defending a woman in court whose indictment directly resulted from her race…and glossing over that fact, like it hardly matters.

“I bet you feel uncomfortable right now. You know, so do I. It’s hard to talk about this stuff without offending people, or feeling offended. It’s why lawyers like me aren’t supposed to say these things to juries like you. But deep down, if you’ve asked yourself what this trial is really about, you know it’s more than just whether Ruth had anything to do with the death of one of her patients. In fact, it has very little to do with Ruth. It’s about systems that have been in place for about four hundred years, systems meant to make sure that people like Turk can make a heinous request as a patient, and have it granted. Systems meant to make sure that people like Ruth are kept in their place.”

I turn to the jury, beseeching. “If you don’t want to think about this, you don’t have to, and you can still acquit Ruth. I’ve given you enough medical evidence to show that there’s plenty of doubt about what led to that baby’s death. You heard the medical examiner himself say that had the newborn screening results come back in a more timely fashion, Davis Bauer might be alive today. Yes, you also heard Ruth get angry on the stand—that’s because when you wait forty-four years to be given a chance to speak, things don’t always come out the way you want them to. Ruth Jefferson just wanted the chance to do her job. To take care of that infant like she was trained to do.”

I turn, finally, toward Ruth. She breathes in, and I feel it in my own chest. “What if people who were born on Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday were never the subjects of extensive credit checks when they applied for loans? What if they could shop without fear of security tailing them?” I pause. “What if their newborn screening test results came back to the pediatrician in a timely manner, allowing medical intervention that could prevent their deaths? Suddenly,” I say, “that type of arbitrary discrimination doesn’t seem quite so silly, does it?”

AFTER ALL THAT.

After months of telling me that race doesn’t belong in a court of law, Kennedy McQuarrie took the elephant in the room and paraded it in front of the judge. She squeezed it into the jury box, so that those men and women couldn’t help but feel the pinch.

I stare at the jury, all lost in thought and utterly silent. Kennedy comes to sit down beside me, and for a moment, I just look at her. My throat works while I try to put into words everything I am feeling. What Kennedy said to all those strangers, it’s been the narrative of my life, the outline inside of which I have lived. But I could have screamed it from the rooftops, and it wouldn’t have done any good. For the jurors to hear it, really hear it, it had to be said by one of their own.

She turns to me before I can speak. “Thank you,” she says, as if I’m the one who’s done her the favor.

Come to think of it, maybe I have.

The judge clears his throat, and we both look up to find him glaring. Odette Lawton has risen and is standing in the spot Kennedy just vacated. I stroke my mother’s lucky scarf, looped around my neck, as she begins to speak. “You know, I admire Ms. McQuarrie and her rousing cry for social justice. But that’s not what we’re here for today. We are here because the defendant, Ruth Jefferson, abandoned the ethical code of her profession as a labor and delivery nurse and did not adequately respond to an infant’s medical crisis.”

The prosecutor approaches the jury. “What Ms. McQuarrie said…it’s true. People have prejudices, and sometimes they make decisions that don’t make sense to us. When I was in high school, I worked at McDonald’s.”