Evidently, I was wrong before…it can get more serious.

Way more serious.

I don’t have a great relationship with God, but I say a silent prayer anyway.

Two of them.

One for Bianca to pull through her surgery with flying colors…and the second for whoever was in the other vehicle.

Putting more pressure on my shoulder, he looks down at the floor. “Hayley was driving the other car.”

My brain fills with confusion. “Hayley…my ex-girlfriend Hayley?”

He gives me a solemn nod. “Yes.”

I rub the knot forming in my chest. My horrible list of fuck-ups are piling up by the minute.

“I hope she wasn’t hurt.”

“Oak,” he says softly, almost like it pains him to say the next words. “She didn’t make it.”

My stomach lurches and the room tilts.

Sure, I’m a fuck-up—the biggest one I’ve ever known—but I’m not a…

Holy fucking shit.

This can’t be happening.

“She died?” My shout rings in my ears, crashing over the room like a tsunami. “I killed her?”

I peer up at my dad, begging, pleading with him to take the words back.

But he can’t.

Because I killed her.

My vision blurs and I take a breath, trying to steady myself.

It doesn’t work.

Because there’s no getting away from this.

No taking back what I did.

Guilt—the kind there’s not enough remorse for—fills my chest.

“I’m sorry,” my dad whispers, wrapping his arms around me.

I don’t understand why he’s apologizing to me.

This is all my fault.

“I kil—”

The lights above me flicker and an all-too-familiar fuzzy, buzzing sound fills my ears.

“He has epilepsy,” my father barks as footsteps stampede into the room. “Take these goddamn handcuffs off him.”

I blink up at the ceiling, a wave of exhaustion rushing through me.

There are so many things I want to say—and even more I want to apologize for—but I can’t.

Because no amount of repentance will ever be enough.

I just want to close my eyes…sleep for eternity.

Maybe when I wake up this will all just be a dream.

Or a beautiful nightmare.

Fuck. I want to see her, so fucking bad.

Tell her the words I should have spoken before it was too late, and I fucked everything up.

Tell her it was real between us.

“It’s against protocol,” some man states.

“Fuck your protocol.” My dad rubs my head, just like he used to after I’d seize back when I was a kid. “You’re okay. You just had another seizure.”

It’s funny because, despite his small stature, my father is a shark inside the courtroom—a monster who will literally ruin your life with a simple closing statement—but deep down he’s got a heart as big as the ocean.

I used to think I inherited mine from him.

But now I know that’s not true…because people with hearts don’t kill.

“Is he okay?” a familiar voice calls out.

Dylan.

Fighting my fatigue, I peel my gaze away from the ceiling.

My cousin’s blue eyes are bloodshot and puffy, like she’s been crying.

Probably because of the mess I’ve made.

I open my mouth, but my dad beats me to it.

“I’m sorry, Dylan. But you can’t see him right now.”

Dylan shuffles her feet. “I just want to make sure he’s okay.”

“I understand that,” my dad says. “But visitation is for immediate family only.”

Dylan’s visibly offended and I don’t blame her one bit. My dad is being a royal douche to her.

“What the fuck, Dad?” I croak. “Dylan is family.” I look at the nurse who’s injecting a needle into my IV, hoping she has a little sway since I’m technically the patient. “I want my cousin to stay.” Turning my head, I focus back on her. “How’s Bianca?”

I don’t miss the flicker of uneasiness in her eyes. “She just got out of surgery—”

“Escort her out,” my dad interjects. “Now.”

“No,” I roar, but no one is listening to me.

“Dylan,” I shout as the officers begin herding her out the door. When our eyes connect, I say, “Tell her what we had was real.” I swallow hard. “Tell her I lo—”

Dylan’s out of sight before I can finish my sentence.

I turn my fury on my dad. “Why the fuck won’t you let her stay?”

He frowns. “Because her loyalty lies with Jace and the Covingtons and I can’t take the chance of her spying on us to get more information for a potential lawsuit.” An expansive sigh leaves him. “I’m already preparing for Hayley’s family to go after us, and if Bianca doesn’t make it—”

Pain sparks in my chest, shooting through me like fireworks.

“What do you mean if Bianca doesn’t—”

And just like that, the lights above me flicker, that staticky, buzzing sound echoing throughout my ears again.

“Can’t you give him stronger medication?” my dad grunts at the nurse. “This is his fourth one in seven hours.”

It’s not the nurse’s fault I’m clustering.

Emotional stress is one of my triggers for seizures, and right now there isn’t enough medication in the world to stop my chest from caving in.

“We are,” the nurse responds, fiddling with my IV. “How are you doing, Oakley?” She gives me a sympathetic smile. One I don’t deserve. “You hanging in there?”

Barely.

“Thank you.”

It takes a good heart to show kindness to a piece of shit killer.

I’m so out of it, my voice is barely audible to my own ears, but I think she hears me because she gives me another small smile before heading for the exit.

“I have a meeting with your lawyer in an hour,” my dad informs me after she’s gone.

That’s…weird.

“Aren’t you my lawyer?”

He shakes his head. “No. It’s a conflict of interest and I don’t want to give them anything else to use against us.” A weary exhale leaves him. “I’m going to pull every goddamn string and kiss every fucking ass I have to in order to make a deal.”

The muscles in my chest draw tight.

I don’t deserve a fucking deal.

“Dad—”

“But,” he interjects, his voice taking on that serious tone again. “I need you to give me some information I can use.”

“What kind of information?”

His eyes roam to the officers on the other side of the hospital room. “Can I have another minute with my son?” When they look like they want to argue, Dad adds, “I promise if you give me two minutes, I will get the truth out of him.”

Get what truth out of me? He already knows everything.

“Two minutes,” one of them agrees before they step out.

“What—”

“Who were you selling drugs for?”