I blurted it out before I could stop myself, “I’m not on the fence, Jack. Your work is divine. I’ve never seen it’s equal. Ever. I’m on your side. I’ll do it!” And you can’t stop me! Ha! I was breathing hard, my face flushed with excitement. Jack stopped walking. Slowly, he turned back to look at me. I continued, feeling my pulse rising as he looked at me like my words had an effect on him. “You’re right. If it’s not wrong, then I have nothing to hide and neither do you.”

Moving back to me, he looked down, “You really think that?” His voice was deep, and the way he looked at me made my stomach clench. Parts of me that I hadn’t felt in years were suddenly on fire. The way his eyes lingered on mine, the set of his jaw and slant of his shoulders, it felt like I was melting under his gaze. Jack was caught between disbelief and awe.

Nodding slowly, I looked away from him. I couldn’t say it to his face, “You’ve always been an amazing artist Jack, but this—what you do here—it’s jaw-dropping for so many reasons. You appreciate beauty, but it’s so much more than that. Each painting is like a living thing. I’ve never seen that before. You’ve taken all the best attributes of the art world and compiled them into one thing, one beautifully stunning thing. It took my breath away when you pulled back the curtain earlier.” My voice grew softer as I spoke.

I could feel Jack’s eyes on the side of my face as I tried to look anywhere but at him. When I stopped speaking, the room was utterly silent. The only sound remaining was the muffled noise of the waves crashing onto the sand. When I turned back to look at Jack, I couldn’t tell what he thought. His head was tilted to the side, his arms folded like he was mad, but his eyes said something else. I just didn’t know what. “It’s late. I better go. Kate will wonder what happened to me.”

Jack nodded, silently walking me to my car. Before I reached for the door, he held out his hand. When I looked down I saw a slim, sleek, iPhone. “Take it. I need to be able to get in touch with you in case the shoot times shift. Sometimes there’s drama with the models.” He shrugged like it was nothing.

I stared at his hand, shaking my head, “I can’t take that.” Cell phones were expensive, and I couldn’t afford to pay the bill. Before I could protest more, Jack grabbed me by a belt loop with one hand and shoved the phone into my pocket with the other. I gasped, my jaw hanging wide open.

Jack laughed when he saw the look on my face, “It’s a job requirement, Abby, and I know you don’t have a cell. Take it. You need it. It’s a company phone, so it’s not like you get to keep it forever. We’re only footing the bill while you work here.” He pointed at the phone as I pulled it out of my pocket. “My number is programmed into the thing. If you’re late, call.” I slid into the car, knowing I’d have to take it. “Same time tomorrow. See you then.” Jack was distant again, all the warmth and playfulness from earlier was gone. I felt like I was going to hurl. I’d said too much. I nodded and drove off with a sinking feeling in my stomach.

CHAPTER EIGHT

“You did not! Abby, what they hell are you thinking?” Kate scolded. First she was mad because it was nearly 2:00am and she thought someone killed me and buried me on the beach. Second, she was pissed because she thought I’d made a really stupid decision. Third, she went nuclear when she realized Jonathan Gray was Jack Gray. I shouldn’t have told her that. Ooops.

Irritated, I grabbed a glass from the cabinet and walked to the sink, flicking on the faucet. “I already told you. There’s nothing wrong with it. There’s no lust/ porn element, and having me there will make sure it stays that way.”

Her dark hair fell over her shoulders as she leaned over the counter, “Abby, he’ll drag you down with him. What if the press sees you? What if there’s a scandal in the next year? Do you really want to risk it all for this? For him?” I looked away from her, chugging my water like it was air. I didn’t want to justify myself to her, but in the back of my mind—I knew that if I couldn’t make Kate see that it was all right, there was no way the church board would be okay with it. Before berating me more, she leaned back. Her jaw dropped open, “Oh my God. It’s him, isn’t it?”

Startled, I turned to look at her. “What are you talking about?”

“It’s Jack Gray. He’s turned your head,” she smiled mischievously at me. Kate could sniff things out like a bloodhound. I blanched as she teased, half sighing while she smiled, “Abby’s got a crush.”

I stiffened, placing my glass in the sink. “It’s not like that. It can’t be like that...”

“Lust doesn’t cancel out just because you took a vow, Abby.” She grinned like the Cheshire cat, green eyes glinting.

I stiffened, appalled at her suggestion, “It’s not lust! Good night!” I walked away from her, slapping my bare feet down the hallway like a petulant child, and slammed my bedroom door.

Behind me, I heard her laughing, “Call it what you want, but you have the hots for Jack Gray!”

CHAPTER NINE

The next morning things seemed better with Kate. She was all chatter and smiles. It was Saturday, so she didn’t have to go into the city. Since I had no money, we couldn’t go shopping or get a coffee, but I really wanted to be outside, so we went to the village to hang out. The streets were lined with shops of all sorts, and the beach wasn’t far away. Kate strolled beside me, nodding at the people she knew every so often as we walked.

“I did some research on Mr. Fabulous. You wanna hear?” she asked suddenly when we stopped in front of the bakery.

My nose was assaulted by the scent of sugar and yeast, and I was in a good mood. “Sure, why not? What’d you find, Kate?”

Before answering, Kate said, “I’m buying you a cookie or something. You’re staring through the glass like a homeless chick.” She grabbed my hand and pulled me through the door. I was protesting, but I lost my focus when that door opened. The scent alone was enough to make me move back to New York. There weren’t places like this where I lived in Texas. My mouth was salivating as we stood in line, staring at a refrigerator case filled with millions of tiny cookies, beautifully decorated pastries, and cakes that put all others to shame.

“Well, Jack sold his first painting about eight years ago. It went on auction at a benefit and sold for over $200,000. That auction is what propelled him into stardom. Suddenly, he was discovered and had patrons breathing down his neck, wanting more art like the one he’d given away. Jack didn’t get a dime from that first sale. It all went to charity.” We inched up to the glass when the person in front of us left. Kate ordered two giant butter cookies covered in mini chocolate chips. After she paid, we walked back outside and continued strolling toward the docks. “Oh my god, these are good.” She bit off another piece of cookie and continued, “After that, he continued to sell racy art to the affluent. He only paints models, which is interesting since he did have some patrons who wanted their portrait made like that. Rumor has it that he turned down a multimillion dollar commission, because the patron insisted on being the model and Jack wouldn’t have it.”

“Holy shit,” I didn’t mean to say it, but I couldn’t believe my ears. Kate laughed at me, spewing cookie, nearly choking while I asked, “Who was it? Who would offer that much money and insist on being in the painting?”

“Forget that!” she said. “Who would turn down that much money? It makes me wonder, it really does.”

I glanced at her, wiping away cookie crumbs that were hugging my lips, “Wonder what?”

We stopped walking. She tilted her head at me, “Wonder what’s wrong with him. Guess which painting that would have been if he painted it?” I shook my head. I would have assumed it would have been after he had some money and felt okay turning it down. It had to be after he knew where his next meal was coming from. But Kate shocked me again, “Number two. He was broke, Ab, and turned down all that money on principle.”

My jaw dropped, eyes going wide. I swallowed hard, nearly choking on my coveted cookie. I stared at Kate for a moment, too stunned to speak. Last night when I spoke to Jack, I could tell how important it was to him that people knew he was beyond reproach, but turning down millions to paint a patron... that sounded insane. Especially when you know broke the way we knew broke—Ramen noodles, toilet paper doubling as tissues, and should I buy dinner or pay the electric bill kind of broke.

Kate continued, “That’s what got him more media attention. The poor kid that turned down nearly three million bucks on principle. The public ate it up, and clients poured out the woodwork. Jack’s been able to do things on his terms since then. His principles helped him get to where he is.”

Breaking off a piece of cookie, I muttered, “Same here, with less successful results.” I sighed. Things worked out for Jack, and I was happy for him. But I wasn’t so lucky.

Kate swallowed the rest of her cookie and asked, “You ready to talk about it yet? Or are you just going to continue to make obscure references to what you did down in Texas that pissed off pews filled with crazy, rich white people?”

We walked out onto a pier and sat at the end. “Obscure references for a while longer. Just until I decide if what I did was right or not.”

An expression of shock washed across her face, “You don’t know? How could you not know if it was right or wrong, Abby?”

I glanced at her, “It was definitely wrong. I just don’t know if it was justified, if I should have. They obviously didn’t think so.” I wanted to come to my own conclusions on this, before I told her. I smiled at her. “I’ll tell you soon.”

Kate looked out at the deep blue water. It lapped at the wooden pier, and the sky was gray, ready to rain. “There’s actually something that I’d like to know more.”

“What’s that?” I asked, not really paying attention.