“With good reason if you’re talking to Blue Stone.” His breathing increases as he seems to break and let go of himself. He scrubs at his face and pales, the enormity of something hitting him hard. “Shit, you . . . you played me so good. Sophia told me there was something, but I never dreamed—”

“You let her talk about me?” I suck in a breath. “That’s why you came back so strange. All it takes is a real conversation, Jack, something we don’t really have, and maybe we could have solved this. And as soon as this play is over, do you think we’ll ever see each other again? Have you even thought about it? We don’t talk about the future. We don’t make plans. Besides, since you had me investigated by Lawrence, surely you knew that I used to work at Blue Stone. I told you the night we met that I edited romance books!” I’m yelling, and I hate it.

He rakes a hand through his hair, his voice low, calm, and steely. “Stop stalling. Just tell me who he is, Elena.”

Dread fills me. I suspect it’s not going to matter what I say. “My old boss. He calls me all the time and offers me a job.”

His face flattens more. “And a book deal to sweeten it? How much money will you get?”

I close my eyes, emotion clawing at my throat.

He’s putting me in a category in his head, right up there with Sophia. Liar. User. Manipulator.

It slices right through me. He’ll never trust anyone. Ever.

He’ll never—

My hands tighten around my purse as I drape it over my dress.

“I want the whole truth. What do you plan to do with what you know about me? You know it all, don’t you? Stories about Harvey I never told anyone. How . . . unsure I get. My shoulder. Are you even on the pill?”

That slices into me deep like a knife, and I bite my lip, tears threatening, and I didn’t think he could hurt me any more, but he’s crushing me. Anger battles back, fighting as my throat tightens.

“I don’t owe you an answer to those questions,” I whisper. He already has my heart. And my pride holds me in her tight grasp, because why should I respond to such things when he should know how I am with him, he should know I . . .

He falls back on a chair, his head bent, shoulders hunched.

Tears come roaring back, and I can’t stop them this time when they fall down my face.

“Don’t cry, Elena, please. I can’t handle . . .” His voice is ragged, tired. Done.

I hang on to my purse, needing an anchor to hold me upright and away from him, because everything inside is battling to take him in my arms and beg him to see me.

“I love you,” I say, the words broken. “I knew you’d sweep me away—and in the end, you’d crush me. I stayed right with you all the way because I couldn’t bear to not be part of your world!”

He doesn’t move a muscle. “Sophia said she loved me too.”

I let out a harsh laugh. “Right. Silly me. All girls say that. But I’m not just any girl, Jack. I’m the girl. The one. The one we joked about at Milano’s that night we met. Deep down, I think you know—”

“I don’t know anything anymore.” He stands, a vulnerable, scared look on his face. His hands shake, and he sticks them in his jeans. He gulps in air. “I need . . . to get my stuff at your house.”

His laptop. His clothes he changed out of before we came. A funny mug he brought to drink coffee from with me in the mornings. A thriller he put on my coffee table.

He turns, then pauses and says, almost as an afterthought, “Do you need a ride?”

Is he serious? I can barely breathe and he’s . . .

I force control into my voice, but the edges tremble. “I’ll walk the two blocks. It’s a nice night. Please go ahead. The door is unlocked.”

His jaw pops as he throws a look at me. The scared look is gone, replaced by a blank face except for a muscle ticking in his jaw. “I brought you. I can take you home.”

I gaze at a point over his shoulder. “I don’t want to be there when you walk out, Jack.”

He hesitates for a second, then pivots and stalks away, shoulders swaying as he moves out of the gym exit and into the hallway. I bite my tongue to keep from calling him back to beg him to just believe in me.

I hear a door shut from the stage and turn to see Giselle there, horror on her face. “Elena, I’m so sorry I heard . . . I was grabbing some of the props, and then you two started talking . . . and . . .”

“It’s okay,” I push out, but I’m not okay.

I’m not. I’m not.

She drops her purse and runs to me and wraps her arms around me as I burst out crying anew. Her hand brushes at my hair. “You’re shaking all over, Elle. Let it out, sweetheart; no one is here but me.”

All I see in my head is his back. Walking away.

I love him. I love him.

And he’s throwing it all away.

He’s dismissing us without even trying.

He’s letting go of us.

Emotion pummels me, and I weep on her shoulder for a long time, the finality of his words playing over and over in my mind.

She stares down at me. “What can I do?”

I close my eyes. “Nothing.”

“I can kick him in the nuts.”

I laugh hoarsely, not meaning to, but the image of Giselle attacking Jack . . .

She takes my hand, lacing our fingers together like we used to when we whispered secrets to each other when we were little. She wipes my face. “Come on, Elle. Let’s get you home.”

Home.

I nod, and we leave the gym, the stillness of the dark hall a reflection of my heart. We get in her car and sit there for a few moments, both of us staring straight ahead, absorbing. I feel numb. Tired. I picture him walking through my house, gathering his small amount of belongings, and leaving.

God. I took too many chances. I accepted each day as it came, hoping that I’d get a little more.

Love is messy, and it takes two people to work at it, two willing people.

Jack will never let his heart go. Emptiness gnaws at me as I think about tomorrow. And the next day. Emotion builds again, and I clench my hands, keeping it at bay.

Giselle holds my hand.

“I think he’d be gone by now,” I say after a long exhale.

She cranks the car, and we drive to the house and head inside. His car is gone, of course. Topher meets us in the kitchen, eyes on me, worried. “What’s going on? Jack came in, then left. He looked . . . messed up.”

Giselle explains in a halting voice, from the conversation with Marvin to the one with Jack, and I head to the cupboard and get out the Pappy, pouring us all a drink.

I hand Giselle her glass, my hands shaky. I inhale a deep breath and look at Giselle . . . “Where’s your ring?” I ask, shoving Jack down deep and focusing on my sister.

She starts and blinks. “Elena, let’s talk about you and how you’re going to get through this play—”

“What happened?” I say, frowning.

She swallows a sip. “I ended the engagement with Preston today.”

“What did he do?”

“Um, sexting with his secretary at the law office. Found them on his phone yesterday. Very descriptive. Boob pics. The usual sordid shit.” She swallows her drink.

Giselle never curses.

“That sonofabitch,” I mutter.

“Asshole.” Topher shakes his head.

Her blue eyes find mine. “I suspected something for a while. Those Saturdays at work. Late evenings.”

“What is wrong with men?” I pour myself another shot. “Except for Topher. We love you.”

“Good to know,” he says, his gaze still watching me carefully.

She grimaces, staring into her glass. “Will you ever forgive me, Elena? I’m sick over it still. Dating him was stupid. Thank God I never slept with him. I think he put a ring on it just so I’d do it.”

I cough as my drink goes down. “What the hell? You’re still a virgin? At twenty-three? I just figured at some point . . .” I gape at her. She barely dated in high school. She never brought guys home from college.

She snorts. “You should see your face.”

I shake my head at her. “You’re an innocent! You have no experience with jerks like him. No wonder you fell under his spell! Oh my God. I will kill him.”

She sighs, that anxiousness still on her face, and I know what she wants. She needs to hear it from me because she never has.

I sigh too. “I forgive you, Giselle. I did a long time ago. He is a mere speck, and you are my blood, and I love you fiercely, and nothing comes between family. It’s all I have, and it means everything to me. This house, this small town, our memories. Do you know how lucky we are? Some families can’t even stand to be in the same room with each other—they give up, but I won’t. I won’t. You are my sister forever.” I feel tears itching to get out again. “Plus, you loved him. And I didn’t, because I know what love really is. I love Jack.” Those last words are whispered.

She bites her lip and hugs me. Pulling away, she says, “I’m sorry. And Jack is just scared. That day they came to clean up, he never stopped looking at you. You walked in the kitchen, and he followed. You went outside—he did. He watched you like you were the sun to his moon. The way you two say your lines . . .”

“That’s pretend,” I say. “For the play. Which is really going to suck.” I inhale a deep breath. How will I get through it?

“No, it wasn’t, Elena. He loves you.”

My lashes flutter. “Yeah, then where is he now?”

Chapter 30