My heart clutches at the thought of that. I touch his face. “Blaze—”

“Let me finish.” He takes a breath. “I just figured you were trashed and saying things you didn’t mean. I mean, we were just having sex—even though it felt like more, you know? Couldn’t throw it away, never in a million years. You wrote it. You said it…and I wanted to believe it.”

There’s a long pause.

“Did you mean it?” He’s staring at me, his breath seeming to halt.

I close my eyes as the word falls from my lips. “Yes.”

He doesn’t speak for a long time, and I open my lids to see him still looking at me, his expression full of wonder.

“I do,” I whisper.

He swallows. “I’m sorry I said those shitty words to you at your party, and I’m sorry everyone knew. It wasn’t what I really meant. I screwed it up, but we’re here. We can do this thing again. I don’t know how good relationships work, and I’m not good at talking except when it’s to run my mouth. I never know what to say…” He touches my chest, tracing the lines of my heart. “Everyone in my life ends up leaving me at some point. You won’t, will you?”

Never let him go. “I won’t.”

His lips land on mine, soft, and I sigh and curl my hands around his neck.

I’m taking this chance. I knew it the moment I walked out of that bathroom at The Purple Iris. I also know I’m flying close to the sun, brushing at the flame he is, but is life worth living if I give up on the most precious thing I’ve ever held in my hands?

26

I blink in the darkness, checking the time on the clock on my nightstand: five in the morning. Charisma is lying next to me. The last time she was here in the fall, we had sex and she left.

Not this time.

We fell asleep after talking and catching up. She told me about going to Nashville and more about her family. Will she let me meet them? Will they like me? Will her mom? Shit. Am I ready to commit to whatever this is?

She turns over to face me, still asleep, her face relaxed, lips parted. I brush a knuckle over them. She’s never kissed another guy here, and I know what that means to her.

She meant it when she wrote I love you. I let those words reverberate in my chest.

She snuggles in closer to me, a sigh coming from her. Last night already feels far away, a fleeting moment, tenuous and fragile, so I kiss her, savoring the feel of her lips against mine.

“Morning,” I say with a smile when her eyes blink open.

“It’s the ass crack of dawn. Why are you awake?” she murmurs.

“My brain is up. I can’t sleep once it’s running.” I push hair out of her face. “It might help if you took your clothes off.”

“Me taking my clothes off will help you sleep?”

“It might. Wanna find out?”

“Well, I must do my part to ensure that Blaze Townsend gets his beauty rest.”

“Smart girl.” I reach for the hem of her shirt, tugging it up, and she moves around with me, sliding her arms through. I toss it on the floor. She’s wearing a purple bra, lacy and low, accentuating her creamy pale skin.

“Charm,” I groan, my fingers teasing the outline of her cleavage. “You wreck me.”

“I know.” She has this bemused expression as she pulls my shirt off and throws it over her shoulder.

I wrap my arms around her and hold her against me, her skin on mine. “This…this…your skin against mine…”

She kisses her way up to my neck until she’s finally on my cheek, my chin. My body tightens, anxious for her lips on my mouth, and I let out a growl when her tongue touches mine then plays, dipping in and then coming back out. I lie back and let her make love to my mouth, kissing the corners, tilting her head and exploring, flicking her tongue against mine.

I take control of us, my mouth straining up and opening, taking her in deep, sucking on her tongue and swirling. I can’t get deep enough. I can’t crawl inside her like I want to, but I think my kiss tells her how long I’ve waited.

“Fire in my hands,” I whisper, breathing out.

“The things you say…”

I reach down and slide my fingers inside her shorts, my fingers grazing over her tiny, lacy underwear. “How many of these kinds of panties do you have?”

“So many. All colors. A few thongs.”

“I want to see them all. Fashion show later at your place?”

She’s laughing as she pushes my jeans to my feet and throws them to the floor. My cock juts up, pointing straight at her, and I laugh. “He knows what he wants.”

“So do I.” She runs her hands from the tops of my bare shoulders to my thighs, where she tangles her hands in the leg hair there. Those big brown eyes lift to mine as she strokes my cock, rubbing her fingers over the head.

Lust licks at me, but I tamp it down. I want to savor her, enjoy her.

“No need to rush,” I say, and I lean up and pull her back to where I want her, flush against me.

I suck her nipple through the lace while my hands unhook the back clasp. Her nipples are rosy and erect, her breasts straining as I massage them, licking and blowing on her skin.

My fingers dip into her panties. “You slay me, hot and wet…” I rub circles on her clit. I slowly slide her underwear down until they’re gone.

I just stare down at her, taking all of her perfection in.

She watches me. “I like how you look at me.”

“Get used to it. You aren’t getting away from me this time. You aren’t walking out that door unless I’m with you.”

She laughs and says, “Okay.”

I move down her body, my hands clenching around her inner thighs, kneading the soft skin there, my nose drifting up her knee. I lick at a freckle and she gasps. My thumbs spread her apart, and when she tries to close her legs, I tsk. “Let me see you. We never did this, Charm, and I can’t stop thinking about you on your bed that day. I wanted to put my mouth on you and taste you. I wanted to play with this…” I run my tongue over her folds, delving inside her softness. My tongue rotates on her, and her body arches up off the bed. “You’re beautiful.”

She spreads her legs and clutches the sheets as I own her with my tongue, taking and lapping, her little gasps making me hotter. Her body is wet, dripping down her leg, her nub hard as I take it in my mouth and flick it. “Do you like this?”

“Is it not obvious?” She exhales heavily.

“This?” My thumb presses against the star opening below her opening, that forbidden part.

“Yes, damn you.” She huffs out a laugh. “Though if you pull out a butt plug, I’m out of here.”

I laugh against her skin and kiss her inner leg. “No plugs. No one’s done this with you?”

“No.”

Satisfaction runs through me and I smile.

She raises her head and glares at me. “Don’t stop now.”

“Never.” I laugh and write my name on her with my tongue. Blaze.

She writhes under me. Her legs move restlessly on the bed and her skin turns a rosy color.

“Blaze…”

“Promise you won’t get tired of me, Charm. Promise me you’ll stay.” I say the words against her skin, not able to look at her, terrified of my own vulnerability. My tongue flicks at her as I slide my fingers inside. “Say it, baby.”

Her hands clutch my head as she bows up closer to me. “I promise, I promise…”

She stiffens and arches up, spasming under my mouth.

I crawl back up to her and stare down. My eyes hold hers. “You’re mine. Right?”

I hate that anxiousness in my voice, the need to hear her say it, and she seems to know, her eyes soft as she returns my look. “I’m yours.”

Emotion swells inside me. My hands shake as I move over to the side of the bed and grab a condom from the nightstand. I tear it open with my teeth, my body wiggling to get back to her.

“Face me, baby.”

She does, her body pliant and loose.

“Put your leg on my hip, Charm,” I say. “Side by side. I want that. Soft and slow.”

She hitches her leg over me until we line up, her brown eyes on mine, and I groan at the feel of her tits against my chest.

And then we’re kissing again, and a sense of completeness fills me.

She feels so right. This feels right.

Is this what love is?

Is that what’s driven me to near madness every time she’s gotten close to me?

I want her.

I want her.

I want her.

For as long as I can hang on to her.

My hand palms the back of her head, and I kiss her mouth with a ferocity I didn’t realize I was holding back, a banked feeling I’ve let build up for months, a reaction to her finally being in my arms.

I rise up and stare down at her. Words, heavy fucking words, teeter on the tip of my tongue…but I can’t say them. So, I kiss her again, loving her with my mouth, showing her who I am, how deep inside her I want to be.

Later, after we’re both exhausted from doing everything I’ve had in my head for months, we find ourselves on the floor and staring up at my ceiling fan.

We’re holding hands, and I turn to look at her. “Wanna sandwich?”

She rolls on top of me, hair in her eyes. She pretends to think. “It’s breakfast, but I’m starving. Whatcha got?”

“Turkey and Swiss in the fridge. There’s some bread in the cupboard.”

“Got mayo?”