He tucked the pen back in his pocket.

“How many times are you in here?” I asked. I’d counted six.

He seemed embarrassed. “I’ve never written one word in here.”

Good.

Then he spread the towels out on the ground and sat down, patting the floor. I went to him willingly, and we kissed, the heat from our bodies warming up the cool air. His lips were fire, his tongue a flame, igniting me. My hands learned his muscles, discovering the power I had over him. He moaned, putting my hands where he wanted them, teaching me things I didn’t know.

He mapped out my skin reverently with his hands and his tongue followed. My body screamed for him, needing something I didn’t understand, but he did. He gentled our kisses, slowing us down, his face tense with need. “Not here,” he whispered against my lips. “Wait for the stars and moon.”

And inside that old barn at BA, I lost all sense of who Dovey was and fell for him all the way and completely.

Just a simple girl, really, in too deep with a boy way out of her league.

What else could I do but fall in love?

How was I to know that after two more soul-shaking weeks, it would all come crashing down around me?

I got yanked back to the here and now by two things: one was the huge slushy ice puddle I’d stepped in and the other was by a vehicle that passed. I looked around at the empty street. How long had I been aimlessly walking through the snow? My gloveless hands were so cold I couldn’t feel them anymore. I needed to get to my car.

The car that had driven past me stopped and then started backing up. I squinted through the snow, but it was too dark to see who it was. Definitely not Spider since he had the SUV.

Part of me wanted it to be him so I could yell at him for tossing me out.

I shook my head and hitched my bag up more, preparing myself to take off running across the grounds if I had to. No way was I getting in that car. Not even if it were a limo with heat blasting at one hundred degrees Fahrenheit. I considered running back to Spider’s, but my car was closer.

I walked faster.

The car parked on the side of the street, and a tall man snapped open his car door and got out, his movements full of purpose. He stalked toward me.

Oh. What was he doing here?

“You shouldn’t be out here wandering around. It’s too cold,” Cuba said. “Let’s get you inside.”

My adrenaline kicked in and suddenly I wasn’t tired anymore. I was mad. He didn’t know what cold was. Not with his Porsche and ridiculously giant house. And he actually thought I would get in a car with him after all the things he’d told me at the restaurant, about him and all the girls he’d binged on after me. And Emma.

“Dovey?”

“Go away. I liked it better when we weren’t speaking.” I gritted my teeth and turned my back to him, walking the other way. So what if my car was the other direction. I’d figure it out later.

I heard footsteps behind me, so I went faster, putting more space between us.

“Wait,” he called.

“Leave,” I said into the wind. “Go fuck some girl.”

“Dovey, get in the car. Now,” he shouted.

But I couldn’t. Not with him.

He’d destroyed me when he’d discarded me. And tonight, remembering how good we’d been, all that old heartache and despair had come roaring back to the forefront.

I turned my fast walk into a jog, but the ground was slippery, slowing me down.

He caught up with me, putting his hand on my shoulder to stop me. I jerked out of his reach and took off flying for the quad, slipping crazily in the snow but somehow not falling.

I ran past the dance building, putting my all in it. With more stamina than a normal girl, I had a chance.

But if he caught me? I might cry in front of him. I might give in to all these crazy feelings I had. I might say something I’d regret. I might tell him about the drugs.

I pumped my arms harder.

Snowflakes blew in my eyes as I made it through the stone gates that led to the quad. Huge oak trees greeted me and I zoomed past them. Running, running, running. My breath gushed in and out as I powered on. Hope sprang when I saw headlights on the next street over. It gave me a little extra…

He tackled me, and I went face first to the ground, my nose and mouth eating snow and dirt. He grunted and flipped me over, but I was ready, lashing out at him with my hands, punching and slapping, trying to weasel away from him.

I bucked my hips to get him off me. He flayed around on top of me but still managed to grab my hands around the wrist. Sitting on my legs, he pushed my arms up around my head, making me into a T.

I yelled and flailed and shoved with my body, but he wasn’t going anywhere.

He knew it and I did. I wasn’t his first take-down. I wouldn’t be his last.

“What the hell is wrong with you,” he said in a ragged voice. “Are you insane? I just wanted to help you.”

I contorted my body and twisted my head so I didn’t have to meet his gaze.

“Get off me!” I screamed.

My philosophy is to usually hold it all in, but how could I when Sarah had borrowed money, I carted around drugs, Emma was pregnant, and now Spider? It was too much. My life was spiraling out of control, and like a 747 in a tailspin, I was going down, down.

Emotion bubbled and swelled and finally erupted, and I screamed long and hard, the sound splitting into the silence of the night. And when that was over, I covered my face, not wanting him to see. Oh, and I tried to hold back the tears, but it didn’t work. Hot and wet and unwelcome, they coursed down my cheeks, proving that I’d finally broken.