“God, not you too.” He seizes my chin, forcing me to look at him. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry I didn’t take the plane you were on.”

The sincerity in his eyes—and the fact he drove thirty-eight freaking hours to be here—proves he is. “I know.”

His lips find my neck again. “Promise you won’t give up on me.”

I won’t. Ever.

“I promise.”

We fall onto the bed, a fusion of obsessive kisses and soft I love-yous.

A mixture of uncontrollable touches and ragged breaths.

Two damaged, broken people so melded together they became whole again.

I undo the buttons of his shirt and slide it off his shoulders, planting a row of kisses along his collarbone.

I used to think I knew what sex was—hormones and lust. Fulfilling a biological urge and releasing some pent-up impulse.

And while it can be all those things…it can also be more than that.

It can be loving someone so much you want to give them the rawest, most stripped-down parts of yourself…because there aren’t enough words to express how much you feel for them.

It’s needing something a little less fortified…and a lot more vulnerable.

Something pure and genuine.

“I want you inside me,” I breathe as he buries his face in my cleavage.

With a grunt, he tugs down my pajama pants. My panties quickly follow. “My fingers and tongue will be inside you any minute. Promise.”

It’s almost adorable how oblivious he is.

“No…I meant you. All of you.” I clear my throat. “Sex.”

Because if you can’t say it, you shouldn’t be having it.

He stops moving. Heck, I’m pretty sure he stops breathing for a solid minute.

Finally, he lifts his head. “Are you sure?”

I nod. “I’m ready.”

His eyebrows pinch. “I didn’t…I don’t have a condom. I wasn’t expecting…” A rush of air escapes him. “I thought you were waiting for marriage.”

The fact he’d be willing to wait that long means more to me than he’ll ever know.

But I know what I want. Him. Now.

“I’m on birth control,” I remind him. “Unless you’re opposed to having sex without a condom—”

“I’ve never had sex without one before.” He swallows hard. “You’ll be my first.” His lips curve into a smirk. “Be gentle with me.”

I slap his shoulder. “Jackass.”

He tips my chin, his expression turning serious. “I don’t want you to regret this…me. Because once it happens, that’s it. No going back.”

Cupping my hand around the base of his neck, I pull him closer. “I’ll never regret you, Colton.”

Even if we crash and burn…I’ll never regret giving this to him.

I’ll never regret loving him.

Getting off the bed, he steps out of his pants and boxers.

The sight of a nude Colton standing before me is…well, there are no words.

However, it’s the hint of vulnerability in his expression that does me in.

Like this is more than just sex for him too.

“Can I see you?” he rasps. “All of you?”

Panic rises in my throat. Every time we’ve hooked up, I’ve managed to keep an article of clothing on me…attempting to shield myself.

But I can’t do that with him now. Loving someone…means giving them everything.

Including the ugly parts of yourself you’d rather they never see.

I raise my shirt above my head and toss it on the floor…baring myself to him.

“You’re beautiful.”

The fact that he’s not looking at my body, but right into my eyes as he says it makes my heart thump in my chest.

Crawling onto the bed, he kisses me slowly as his hand slips between my legs. “I want to make sure you’re ready first.”

“I am.”

His fingers sink inside me. “Really ready.”

There’s so much anxiety coursing through me it’s hard to calm down. It’s not apprehension or fear…it’s just…my body and mind are fully aware of what’s about to happen, which makes it impossible to relax enough to have an orgasm.

“I won’t be able to…but it’s okay,” I tell him as he lowers his head. “It’s not your fault, I’m just wound—”

Parting my legs, his tongue strikes my pussy.

“Close your eyes,” he murmurs, planting sloppy kisses along my sensitive flesh.

When I do, his mouth clamps onto my clit and I moan.

I love how he always knows just how to please me.

My breathing becomes labored as he pumps his fingers in tandem with his tongue, bringing me closer to the edge.

I fist his hair when the first stirrings hit. “I’m gonna come.”

He laps at me harder, faster…until I’m nothing but a shuddering mess, crying out his name.

“That should make things a little easier,” he says, aligning himself on top of me.

I spread my thighs wider when I feel him nudging my entrance.

“As much as I want this, I hate that I’m going to hurt you,” he whispers.

“The first time is never great,” I remind him, recalling everything I’ve heard from other girls throughout the years. “I won’t hold it against you though.” A smile breaks free. “Besides, you can make it up to me with a lifetime of mind-blowing sex.”

He grins. “You better believe it, Bible Thumper.” Reaching between us, he guides himself inside me, inch by excruciating inch. “Tell me if you need me to stop for a bit.”

My body tenses with the first wave of pressure. “I will.”

He pauses. “You okay?”

Pain is temporary. We’re forever. “Keep going.”

Another round of pain seizes me, and I clamp up. “Are you in?”

His jaw works. “Seriously?”

Oh, shit. I definitely didn’t mean it like that. There is definitely no mistaking that. “I meant all the way.”

“No. Only about halfway. I’m trying to go slow so I don’t hurt you.”

That’s not gonna work for me. I’ve always been a rip the band-aid off type of girl.

“Do you think you can just…you know.”

“Push through?”

I nod so hard I’m surprised my head doesn’t pop off. “God, yes. Please.”

I brace myself for the pain, but he stops again.

I’m about to yell at him, but the adoration in his eyes is so overwhelming my heart somersaults.

“I love you, Sawyer.”

Leaning in, I kiss his lips. “I love you, too, Colton—Oh.”

His cock slides into me in one swift stroke.

“Fuck,” Cole rasps.

A sharp stab that eases into a throbbing ache permeates through me. I force myself to breathe through it as I stretch to accommodate him.

Cole leans his forehead against mine, his breathing frantic. “God, you feel fucking amazing.”

I run my hands up his back. “You do too.”

There’s still some discomfort, but despite that, I have no doubts about doing this.