Honeysuckle Season Page 60
She turned to him and kissed him. Hard. And before she thought much about it, she was reaching for the snap on his jeans.
“I don’t have protection,” he muttered.
“After my last miscarriage, my doctor told me I’d likely never get pregnant again,” she said.
He drew back and studied her.
“It’s a long story. And I haven’t slept with anyone since my ex two years ago. I’m about as safe as they come.”
“There’s nothing safe about you,” he muttered, cupping her face.
She unsnapped his button. “I’m assuming this is breaking a dry spell for you?”
“It is.”
“Then if we can trust each other, this could be fun.”
That seemed to catch him up. He studied her in the moonlight, smoothing the hair from her face, as if he could somehow peer into her soul.
“Jump or dive. Not forever, but now,” she whispered. “We’ve got to take the plunge sometime.”
His eyes darkened and, after finally nodding, he kissed her again. Once the decision was made, the rest came very quickly. They undressed each other in a fevered pitch. Her hands were trembling; several times she reminded herself that this was sex. They both were deprived and starved, and a quick trip to erotica land would do the trick for them both.
When he lowered her onto their pile of clothes on the floor, she had no sense of time or place. This. This was what she wanted.
Their joining was hurried and full of repressed emotions, and when their desires boiled over and they plummeted into the abyss together, she was fairly sure her heart had burst.
After, she curled next to him, absorbing the heat from his body. She had never done the one-night-stand thing, and she wondered what the walk (actually drive) of shame back to her house would feel like. She tried to locate an ounce of remorse but could not find anything. For the first time in a couple of years, she felt alive.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
OLIVIA
Saturday, October 3, 1942
The Woodmont Estate
Sadie’s child had kicked Olivia’s hand, and she had immediately withdrawn it, as if she had been burned.
“Sadie, does your mother know?” Olivia asked.
Sadie drew the folds of her coat closed and turned away from Olivia, as if unconscious fears had roared to life. “There’s nothing to tell Mama. Whatever is going on with me will pass. What you felt was indigestion.”
Olivia stared at the girl now, noticing her face was rounder and her breasts fuller. “That was a kick. A baby’s kick. You have a baby growing inside of you.”
Sadie kicked the stone floor with the heel of her boot. “I’m getting fat, is all. That’s all it is.”
“No, Sadie, you’re pregnant. Who is the father? You never told me about any young man.”
“I don’t have a boyfriend.”
“But you were with a man. Maybe in the spring.”
Sadie buried her face in her hands. “I just went to the dance.”
“You did more than dance.”
“I didn’t want to do what he did. I thought we were just sitting in the back of his car. And then he started messing with my dress and was on top of me.” Tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. “I can’t have a baby inside of me. My mama will be heartbroken, and then she’s going to call the sheriff, and they’re going to take me away.”
Olivia took Sadie’s hands in hers. “No one is doing that.”
“They will,” she shouted as she snatched her hands away. “I don’t have a husband, and the sheriff already warned me after the accident that I’d go to jail if he had any more trouble with me.”
“He did what?”
“The sheriff came to my house after the accident and told me I was in big trouble.”
“You didn’t do anything. I was driving the car, and even that wasn’t enough to lose the baby. The doctor said it is more to do with me than anything that happened.”
“It doesn’t seem right, you losing babies and me with one I don’t want. I wish I could give you this baby right now; then you could carry it in your belly and love it like your own.” Tears now ran down flushed cheeks. “Then I could leave town, and you could have the child you been wanting so bad.”
Olivia wished the same. She would like nothing better than to take this child and make it her own. But her husband would not accept it. She loved him but understood he would not raise a child that was not of his flesh.
“When did this back seat event happen?” Olivia asked.
“In March.”
“Which means you’re nearly seven months pregnant and due in December.”
Sadie’s face tightened with worry, as if the mere mention of the child terrified her. “December’s so close. I can’t have a baby in a couple months. What do I do?”
“Do you have the father’s name, Sadie?”
“He told me not to tell.” Her voice hitched with desperation. “He said no one would believe me.”
“Who was it?”
Sadie dropped her gaze to her calloused palm. “It was Malcolm. Your husband’s cousin.”
“Malcolm Carter?” He had a reputation as a ladies’ man, and he had visited them in March to cheer up Edward after the loss of the baby. He had invited them both out to hear the band, but she had been feeling poorly. Edward, too, had declined his offer. If she had gone, she wondered if her presence would have spared Sadie.
“Please don’t tell your husband.” Her voice sounded desperate.
“Why not? He should know what kind of man Malcolm is.”
“Malcolm said if I told, it would get me in more trouble. I don’t want to get sent away.”
Olivia wasn’t naive. If it came down to Sadie’s word against Malcolm’s, everyone would take Malcolm’s version of events over Sadie’s. For girls like Sadie in this kind of situation, the reality was unjust and bleak. “Go home, Sadie, and tell your mother what is happening. You need her help.”
“She’ll throw me out.”
“Is your mother a kind woman?”
“Of course she is. She’s my mother.”
“Then trust that she’ll help you. You need her.”
“I don’t want this baby.”
“That doesn’t matter now. Unfair as this may sound, you also need to stay away from town until after the baby is born. If you weren’t so small, I’m sure someone would have noticed by now.”
“I’ve been wearing my brothers’ pants because mine don’t fit.”
“You have the advantage of the winter as well,” she said. “People tend to stay at home and not socialize as much.”
“What about supplies? I got to go into town to get those.”
“I’ll bring you your supplies.”
“How are you going to do that?”
“I can drive.”
“I thought you didn’t want your husband to know.”
“Don’t worry about him. I’ll handle it.”
“What about Malcolm?” Sadie’s face was pale and stricken with fear.
“Leave him to me.”
“What are you going to do to him?”