But when I pull her into my arms and kiss her, we both melt. We fuck in her bed. I go home.

The next day, the torment continues.

Because I don’t deserve Bernadette. None of us do.

And yet … there’s not a single one of us that isn’t in love with her.

Shame.

It could only work if we could learn to share. But that … it’ll never happen.

Never.

November eighth, Now …

Bernadette Blackbird

There must be something on my face when I get back that screams just got my brains fucked out by Aaron Fadler because Vic takes one look at me and scowls.

“I was starting to wonder if we might have to come after you. Answer your damn phone when you’re going to be out for so long.”

I just stare at him as he stands up from one of the chairs at the dining table, casting those ebon eyes of his over me and then flicking them up to glare at Aaron when he comes in behind me.

“You’re right,” Aaron says, somewhat breathless, but resolute as he returns his leader’s stare. “We should’ve called and let you know we were going to be out longer than expected.” Vic taps his nails on the surface of the table and looks away, but not like he’s giving in, more like he needs a minute to trap some of that wild violence in his eyes.

“You’ve worked out your differences?” Vic asks, glancing back at me. He’s wearing dark purple cargo shorts and a loose white tank. The holes on the arms are so big, I can see his gorgeous chest and abs underneath. My body throbs in response, and I exhale sharply.

“By that, you mean, did you two fuck?” I ask, moving around the couches and coming to stand as close to Victor Channing as I dare. He looks down at me, and it doesn’t take a mind reader to tell that he’s absolutely furious. Sharing me with Hael is one thing, but Aaron? Aaron is a threat in Vic’s eyes. He had to know it would come to this, right? I couldn’t just step into Havoc and not come to some sort of understanding with my ex. He took a bullet for me. I won’t soon forget that. “The answer, by the way, is that yes, we did.”

Vic says nothing, but the shape his mouth makes when he frowns scares me a little bit.

“Why?”

Of all the questions Victor could’ve asked, that’s the one that trips me up the most. Why? Why?

“I … don’t know,” I say, because I don’t. Glancing over at Aaron, I can see that he isn’t sure either. Are we back together? If we are, how do things work with Vic? I chew at my lower lip for a moment. “That’s what the sex was about, testing our limits.” I lick my lips and taste the sweetness of Aaron’s mouth. If Vic is my poison, Aaron is my antidote. One burns so good that you can’t help injecting yourself, even if you know it’s wrong. The other is violent relief, a desperate soothing balm that feels like old memories and hope.

I’m stuck right in the middle.

“Our girl,” Aaron says, voice low. I glance sharply in his direction and see that his head is tilted down, his eyes focused on Vic. He’s breathing hard, but he’s calm. Almost too calm. “A Havoc Girl. You keep saying she’s yours, and I can’t blame you. I’d like her to be mine, too, but, uh”—Aaron pauses to grab a beer from the fridge, leaning his back against the door after it closes—“that’s not what we agreed on. You’re as bound to Havoc’s price as she is. Or are you above it, Vic?”

Victor just stares at Aaron, devoid of emotion, as impossible to read as always. The thing is, if you want to consume someone, you have to make room in yourself to hold all of that energy. You have to make space. And what happens to that bit of you that you give away? Sometimes it’s eaten by somebody else.

I can feel Victor inside of me—metaphorically speaking, at this moment anyway—and I know him much better than he thinks I do. His dark eyes slide to mine, studying me.

“I can sleep with any Havoc Boy I want,” I say, and there’s a visible ripple in Victor’s demeanor. He stalks toward me, but I’m not afraid. He just doesn’t scare me.

His hand lashes out, fingers curling around my wrist.

Aaron steps forward, teeth bared in warning.

“I keep trying to let her go, Vic, because I betrayed her, so I know I don’t deserve her. But you know what Bernie and I figured out today? I’m not the hero in the cape anymore. If I want her, I’ll have her. You agreed to that, when you slit her palm with that knife.”

“What’s your point, Fadler?” Vic asks, cocking his head to one side. His entire body radiates with rage, but he doesn’t act on it. He told me I needed to master my anger. How can I argue that, seeing as he’s most definitely got an ironclad grip on his own? “Your girl, my girl. I’m taking her into the bathroom. If I try to talk to you before I do that, I can’t be held responsible for how I behave.”

Victor pulls me away from the kitchen and into the half-bath near the front door.

“Are you insane?” I ask him as he steps inside with me, slamming the door behind us. It’s dark in here, but for a single nightlight. I notice Vic doesn’t exactly rush to turn on the light. Instead, he sits me on the counter, just like Aaron did. Does he know he’s mimicking what happened between us earlier? Not likely.

“I can’t stand the thought of you hating me,” Vic admits, and my brows go up in surprise. He sounds … different, like his voice is fractured in places. Vulnerable and hating it. That’s what he is. “You’ve barely looked at me since the Halloween party. You’re not afraid of me, are you, princess?” Victor growls at me, nuzzling against my neck and making me shiver.

I laugh at him.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” I say, curling my fingers around his strong upper arms and digging my nails into his skin, marking him as my property. God help the next girl who thinks she can look at my man, let alone touch him. Because, even if I’m not ready to admit it aloud to him, that’s what Victor Channing is.

Mine.

“Then what? You’re upset about the video, I understand that.” He kisses my neck, and I shiver. “You want to run, because of what I told you. Because I’m selfish and I want you, have always wanted you. Or maybe it’s because of what we did to Aaron? Making him give you up …”

“Victor, shut up,” I snap, and he leans back, curling his lip at me. The nightlight illuminates the room just enough that I can see his teeth, and the shine of his dark eyes. “Yes, all of those things are bothering me. I felt like you betrayed me and honestly … it was almost a worse feeling than watching Neil hurt my sister. Are you stupid or something? I’ve been lusting after Havoc for years, watching you guys for even longer. I’m not going anywhere, not even if you’d truly deserve to see me flee.”

For a few moments, the room is quiet. Then I hear Aaron’s footsteps, moving away outside the bathroom door. He was listening, and I’m glad for it. At least the truth is out there.

“You know it wasn’t just me, right?” Vic asks, and I nod, which in reality just rubs my head against his some more. Primal marking, nuzzling, togetherness. I want more. “Nobody wanted to let you go. They’re all into you, Bernie. All of them. And that terrifies me.” He leans back and exhales. “I haven’t been afraid since I was five and here you come, sauntering in and shattering everything. That’s what you’ve done, Bernie, you’ve ruined me.”